10 Best Questions Ever
Ten best questions ever plus two
If you’re interested in building relationships, start asking questions. If you’re interested in enhancing your opportunities and reaching higher, start asking questions. If you want to honor someone, ask them a question.
Asking questions is the smartest thing you can do.
Most important, asking a question creates silence and silence is the ultimate opportunity.
10 Best Questions Ever
- At the end of a conversation – “Is there anything I should be asking?”
- While talking with a passionate person – “What’s important to you, right now?”
- At the beginning of a meeting – “Why are we here?”
- At the end of a meeting – “Who does what, by when?”
- Any time – “How can I help?”
- When receiving criticism or advice – “Where will your suggestions take us?”
- With your wife – “What can I do that makes you feel loved?”
- With your husband – “What can I do that makes you feel respected?”
- With your children – “What am I doing that frustrates you?”
- Within your own mind – “What vision drives me right now?”
Bonus question when conversations are ending – “Do you have any questions?”
Bonus stupid question – “Why do psychics have to ask your name?”
Reminder: Always follow a question with silence.
Which question can you use today? What questions do you like asking?
We asked questions yesterday.thanks for the opportunity.
Bill
Yes we did! Love you Bill
These are thought-provoking questions, Dan. I should avoid #9 right now because my teen’s list of things that frustrate her would probably take all day!!! But I find that true in an area of my life outside my job that I do “for fun” — being involved in our local film school’s productions. I have asked the STUPIDEST questions but the beautiful thing is that for the most part, the students are so excited about filmmaking and sharing their passion that they answer, and never make fun of my ignorance. There’s something to be learned from that!!
Hi Paula,
I chuckled at your comment regarding #9.
Regards and best wishes 🙂
Dan
and the always relevant – “how’s that working for you?”
Good one Renee… 🙂 thanks, Dan
I love the apologetics approach to teaching even though I am not very good at it. I lwould love to be better at teaching by asking the rigth questions like Christ did during his ministry here on earth. This skill is one of the many things I appreciate in the minstry of Ravi Zacharias whom I consider to be a master at asking the right questions when confronted by individuals. Thnaks for the list.
Hi Dan,
I stumbled upon your blogs, and now can’t stop reading your thought provoking articles.
As you know, what compliments your asking questions, is the discipline of listening. The result, a more engaging conversation/relationship.
Great work, I look for to subscribing.
Dujon
Dujon,
Thanks for subscribing and thanks for leaving your thoughts. I’m honored that you enjoy Leadership Freak.
All the best,
Dan
I agree with you. I would ask #10. I would like to add “questions need to be asked the moment it comes up in our mind to either another knowledgeable person or ourself”. I have observed, most people refrain from asking question(s), thinking they might appear ‘dumb’ asking question(s) or question(s) themselves could be ‘dumb’. In my experience, if we don’t ask question(s), we would become dumb. There is no question which is ‘dumb’.
Yogeesh
Yogeesh,
Your idea of not waiting makes sense to me. I find if I wait I forget!
Thanks for leaving your first comment.
Best to you,
Dan
Dan,
I’m running for the Board of Directors of the Students Guild of my school, and these questions have been helping a lot while meeting with members of my administration for discussing our proposals.
Our talks are getting smarter, and that’s good for us – and for our colleagues!
Regards,
Will.
Will,
Thanks for leaving your first comment. I’m delighted you are participating in the discussion and hope you win! Love how you say, “our talks are getting smarter.”
Best to you,
Dan
I liked this post until I got to #7 & #8. Unfortunately, one of the problems I’ve witnessed for perpetuating a lack of communication in relationships is exactly what played out here in your list: women don’t need respect, and men don’t need love.
Women in turn are afraid to fully engage in a conversation because they don’t feel their opinions are respected, and men refuse to engage in difficult conversations for fear of the “delicacy” of the women.
Feeling loved means little without feeling respected when it comes to communication.
JJ,
Thank you for joining in for the first time and adding your thoughts to the conversation. I appreciate your approach.
I look forward to hearing more from you.
Regards,
Dan
Love #10 – it’s what reminds me of what keeps me going with my various projects.
Lol at the bonus stupid question 😀
Sulthana,
Thanks for being a first time commenter. I appreciate it. I’ve learned over the years that vision is the most important thing in my life. I can do this or that and work hard and try to be excellent but if I don’t know where I’m going (vision) then how can I know if I’m using my energies well.
All the best to you,
Dan
Dan,
Good article. I just wrote a piece about the power of questions. We all need to ask more questions and take the time to listen to the answers. Everyone loves to talk and its amazing what one can learn by asking good questions and hearing the response.
Teresa
http://www.dailyvoicemaildealio.com
Your virtual retail coach!
Teresa,
Welcome to Leadership Freak. I’m glad you added “take time to listen.”
Regards,
Dan
They say Socrates was one of the wisest philosophers ever. All he ever did was ask questions. I’m always amazed that some of the most obvious questions never get asked in meetings.
Jason,
Thank you for leaving your fist comment on Leadership Freak. I’m ashamed to say that sometimes, I still don’t want to look like a fool so I don’t ask. Pride keeps me from asking questions I should ask and keeps me in the dark! Sounds dumb but sometimes its true.
Thank you for contributing to others by leaving your comment.
Best to you ,
Dan
> What questions do you like asking?
“Why…?”
It’s often easy to ask “why” of others. It’s a question I like to ask to get myself and others thinking creatively.
And I need to ask myself “why” as well, which isn’t always easy, because I don’t always want to examine why I do something, or face the truth of “why.” Sometimes I don’t want to know.
Sam,
Thank you for leaving your first comment. You add value to the LF community.
Love how your honest about not wanting to ask yourself why. In my own life, I’m all about change but I’m finding it so much easier when change is about others. It’s different when it’s me. Why is that? 🙂
Best to you,
Dan
Dan,
Ah, you’ve asked the “why” question. 🙂
We don’t want to be in the spotlight — the hot seat — when our motives might be questioned. It’s not always easy to face the truth about ourselves. We all come with baggage, and that usually involves a lot of emotional pain, which can be triggered when the “why” questions start. Our natural reaction is to avoid or recoil from.
Those of us who have or are continuing to learn to face the truth of our own baggage and work through it, can then more honestly face the truth of ourselves, be more accepting of others, and provide a safe environment for asking “why” and other questions, and get honest answers and conversation.
When that happens, then you have an environment of trust where creativity can flourish.
Sam
Hi Dan
Brilliant post and some great responses! I too laughed out loud at the stupid bonus question – quality!
Besides often asking ‘what do you feel about […]’, as a vision-oriented person I mostly ask ‘why’ and ‘where are you going’ and ‘what will it look like when you get there?’.
Have a great weekend – kind regards
John
Great questions!
love leadership tips. It keeps me on my feet!