Too much honor?
I’ve heard concern that too much honor may de-motivate volunteers and employees. If you give people too much praise they’ll lose passion and get fat and lazy. They’ll settle into the notion your organization is lucky to have them. They’ll need to be served rather than serve.
Show honor that motivates.
You get what you honor. Saying, “great job,” celebrates a completion and allows recipients to define “great.” You may be more effective if you carefully choose what and how you honor others.
Honor behaviors.
Rather than saying you’re great, highlight the fact that they stayed late to help their team meet a deadline.
Honor behaviors connected to values, mission, and vision. Say, “When you stopped in the hall to help a bewildered customer you helped make us who we want to be.”
Honor and explain the impact of behaviors on other employees. Don’t say, “Great job.” Say, “Mary is encouraged and our safety record is preserved when you keep your area clean.”
“Giving people self-confidence is by far the most important thing that I can do. Because then they will act.” Jack Welch
Honor and explain the impact of their behaviors on the company. Say, “When you leave your station to help Bill it keeps the line moving and helps us surpass quota.”
Don’t honor completed tasks. Honor the energy and effort that got the task done.
If you’re concerned that “too” much appreciation makes people over confident and lazy, start honoring the right things.
*****
Have you seen “too” much honor de-motivate an employee?
How can managers and leaders show honor that motivates?
As one of my sergenat-majors once said: “…there’s only 30 centimetres difference between an encouraging tap on the shoulder and a kick in the butt”. What he meant was that you have to be cautious with both praise and reprisal. You have to think twice before you use either of the instruments.
Which reminds me of an instructionmovie we used in the eighties. It was part of a management development series made by John Cleese who was then at the height of his MD-period and (therefore?) pretty hilarious. The message was that “managing isn’t cheerleading”. If praise becomes just a yell people see through it and the message certainly will not come across.
Hans,
I’m so glad you took a moment to stop in. Great seeing you again.
The concern you mention re: encourgement/kik in the butt, motivated this short piece. I’m troubled by those who too frequently withhold praise because they think it leads to laziness or indulgence. I hope it was clear that I think the issue is the way praise is given.
Once again it’s all about leadership. We might want to blame others but maybe we should blame ourselves.
All the best to you,
Can
Dan:
Your post reminds me of a lesson that is taught to new parents. When your child does something wrong, you do not say “Bad Boy!”, you explain that your boy did a “bad thing”. At the same time, praising your child’s actions when they do a “good thing” and tying it back to how that makes them a better person reinforces the behavior AND self image. “Good Boy! You helped your brother pick up his toys.”
Praising or correcting a behavior, reinforces the lesson. Tying it to your perception of the person – postively or negatively can affect their perception of themselves.
In parenting, or in the workplace, the secret is moderation. As a leader,not showing appreciation, sharing credit or offering insight on how a job can or should be done, shows a lack of concern or attention. Equally important, doing it constantly,for every little thing can lessen the impact over time. The trick is to be consistent and to provide recognition or guidance commensurate with the value of the behavior.
Joan,
Thank you for bringing family/parenting to the conversation. I frequently feel that leadership principles need to be exercised first in our homes. After all moms and dads ARE leaders.
While reading your comment I was reminded of a manager who kept a praise calendar. Whenever they praised a member of the team they put their name on that date. As time passed it helped them include everyone and kept them balanced.
I usually don’t care much for “moderation.” However, I think you have a point… constant praise becomes meaningless.
Always a pleasure,
Dan
Dear Dan,
I appreciate your point that we should honor effort and energy that got the task done. Similarly rather than praising position of a person, praise his determination and dedication. The question comes to mind is- how to measure success? is it by position or achievement? I think it is the judgment, decision and action that are measured against circumstances and not the position itself.
I agree that too much honor de-motivates employee. It is because too much honor seems to be layered with self centered or self interested intention. So, when you show too much honor to someone, over a period of time, he creates a perception about your intention and behavior. In practice, it happens in almost similar track. People who honor excessively have hidden intention to benefit themselves and in their effort they do almost everything. On the other side, superiors who like excessive honor do the same things with their superiors. And eventually it becomes a trend and perhaps desirable norm for the people in the organization. Why people do so? It seems that people who believe in excessive honor either do not believe their capabilities & potentials or do not have it. So, they make it as a strategy to remain loyal to organization by excessively praising their superiors. Any productive or performing organization do not believe in this philosophy. But, this kind of practices occurs mostly in non performing/non growing organismic or where promotion is based on personal relation and connections. Where pay of performance policy exists , usually excessive honor does not exist. So, too much honor de-motivates competent and capable employees and in fact it motivates incompetent and incapable employee.
Leaders and managers can honor employee by creating a feeling of togetherness, harmony and brotherhood. Respect people opinion, thoughts and engage them into decision making process. Delegate them important assignment and help them to perform higher responsible job. By doing, this actually you create confidence by making them competent and capable.
In the organization where, too much honor practice is followed, incompetent, unskilled and incapable people are generally loyal and talented and competent people leave the organizational. So, if you check the category of people who leave the organization, you can see that it is often the second category of people.
Dear Ajay,
Thanks for stopping in to share you insights.
In particular I notice that you expand the conversation by including – “People who honor excessively have hidden intention to benefit themselves and in their effort they do almost everything.”
Insincere honor = manipulation. Thats a whole new dimension to consider.
I also notice how you suggest that honor doesn’t have to be overt. It’s seen in the culture of an organization that values people.
You have my best regards,
Dan
Ajay is a featured contributor on Leadership Freak. Read his bio at:
http://leadershipfreak.wordpress.com/ajay-gupta
Dan,
I was intriguied by the title of this post, and have a slightly different perspective. When I hear the word ‘honor’, I interpret that not as feedback, praise or criticism, but rather as an intention or a value. I honor ‘you’, and in honoring you as person deserving of respect, I make choices in how I behave toward you. I might choose to praise your effort or the outcome or some specific action you took. I also honor you in giving you candid feedback about what didn’t work, where the outcome wasn’t on target, and have a conversation with you so that we both learn from the event to avoid a similar situation in the future.
What strikes me is that we (collectively) have come to associate a value/intention/orientation toward another human being – honor (a verb) – with ‘honors’ (a noun), meaning praise or acclaim or a measurement of some sort. It is possible to honor someone even when we are giving them a harsh message, even if we are ending the employment relationship. It isn’t easy or natural for many managers, but it is how we would want to be treated.
Everyone deserves to be honored as a human being, to be treated with dignity and respect. It seems to me that we can never ‘honor’ someone too much. Perhaps we need to bring more honor back into the workplace…
Have you seen “too” much honor de-motivate an employee?
How can managers and leaders show honor that motivates?
I would like to address these questions from a slightly different angle. Yes, I have seen “too” much honor de-motivate an employee. And I have to admit, in 14 years of working for the same boss, someone I looked up to but who gave approximately two genuine compliments in those years, perhaps I have not seen much evidence of honor that motivates!
I think that it is important for leaders to be aware that some employees have some pretty entrenced negatives beliefs about themselves — and that when those “empty honor” type comments are bestowed (as well as some constructive honor comments) — the employee continues to spiral into a negative mindset. I don’t know what a solution is for that, and at some point an employer has to focus on the vision and productivity, while the employee has to pursue whatever helps them climb up out of the negativity (EAP? Therapy?). In the long run, even for these employees, concrete honorifics, like you mentioned (rewarding the behavior, such as staying late to help a distraught customer) versus vague ones (you sure are dedicated) bridge a bit of the gap and give the employee something specific to hang on to.
Dear Dan
The real honor is commanded and not demanded .
This philosphy is applicable to individual as a leader and to organisation who believe in the creation of leaders.In early days it was percieved that the leaders are born and they have the birth right to be honored whether they deserve it or not. but the situation is now different leaders has to have the quality to qualify in this segment .there are ample example , the first generation entreprenure who created the huge business empire and created a numoures laedership postion . this laeders are not striving for honors and any amount of honor or praise showered on them is insufficient , here we ahve to distinct the real honor and fake honor which is ( fake Honor ) prevalent now .
We have to differentiate between the opportunistic who create the hype of a person and create the fake image and honor .
Lets go behind the desk and find what is fact .
Interesting post Dan.
I think honor is about one’s overall concept, perception,and appreciation of an individual who she/he is and how they contribute to the overall Values, Mission, and Vision as you so aptly stated. Honor is earned while recognition is given. I don’t think we can honor someone too much, we either do or we don’t however we need to temper our episodes of recognition lest we make them become insignificant and redundant. Like has been mentioned recognition is given for a person’s actions, committment to team work, engagement in pursuing excellence and over all value added to the organization. We established recognition awards 5 years ago for our physicians and the program has been a big success and well received. Similarly our COO has a program in place for our associates. We have also done the same for our mid-level providers and in fact recognize them at the Physician Staff Meeting. We have learned that a sincere and genuine “thank you for all your hard work and dedication. We are proud and grateful you are on the Harbin Team,” goes a long way and supersedes by far any associated tangible reward. People will give you more than 100% and go beyond expectations if what they are being recognized for is meaningful to them. “Motivate them with recognition and teach them with constructive relevant feedback.” thanks, Al
“People will give you more than 100% and go beyond expectations if what they are being recognized for is meaningful to them. “Motivate them with recognition and teach them with constructive relevant feedback.” ”
On the mark. Well said, Al.
Thank you Tracy, I appreciate your kind support. Regards, Al
Dan,
I’ve never seen praise turn into a de-motivator. You might find a similar result if leadership lacks direction while flattering the workforce but that is not truly too much honor. Leaders tend to give too little positive feedback and to dwell on the negative. It’s natural to do so because the negatives are often what needs to improve. I doubt many leaders are capable of giving too much honor if they are also providing the direction and constructive feedback that is also needed.
Chris
Good morning Dan,
When I first read the title of your post, honor as a character trait (like “code of honor”), was the kind of honor that came to mind. Now I see that you mean praise. I believe that it can be too much when the praise in on the wrong things, as you suggest.
Po Bronson published an article a few years back, on some of Carol Dweck’s research with regard to teaching and/or raising gifted (or “smart”) children that I think really illustrates this point. Essentially that praising a child for being “smart” tends to undermine the whole purpose of instilling self-confidence. That it’s so important to praise hard work and effort (action that actually takes place), not the passive state of being “gifted.” I personally think this is a consideration that is human specific and does not stop with children alone.
You can find two insightful articles about Dweck’s research here:
“How Not to Talk to Your Kids: The Inverse Power of Praise,” by Po Bronson
http://nymag.com/news/features/27840/
“Confessions of a Smart Kid,” by Jonathan Rosenblum
http://tinyurl.com/2akr93v
From a personal experience, I appreciated my daughter’s 1st grade teacher. She carefully observed her students throughout the year to support the positive things they put effort into. At the end of the year, she presented certificates specific to each child’s actions that read along the lines of “The effort you put into your drawings really shines,” or “Your helpfulness in the classroom really helped brighten everyone’s day.” The emphasis was on the efforts, with specific positive feedback that empowered the kids toward continued action, even if they’d never thought of what she’d noticed before.
It’s food for thought…
Julia
Anyway, sorry – I lost my summation there. But to tie into your post. The point is that if praise is to be given, it should be communicative and specific to the actions that we wish to encourage. Not nebulous, or generalized to passive states and not in such a way that creates a dynamic we never intended.
Okay all you leaders out there…how do you ‘honor’ those you work with/for?
Verbal, email, written, treats, lunch, chocolate, coffee, mini-event, big event?
Do you have a stash of ‘thank you’ cards in your office that you write up a personal note (specific to a behavior as Dan noted or to overall presentation style that you can clearly identify) and give it to that person…in person? If not, why not? The meta-message behind physical gestures carry lingering, long-term effects. (Had a person who I dropped 4 lines of appreciation to, 8 years later, he still talks about it. He had worked in the field for over 10 years and never gotten a ‘thank you’ note…and did excellent work.) Maybe previous leader ascribed to the ‘leave well enough alone’ style.
Interesting, I had a reaction to the word ‘honor’. (honor may be another umbrella word for me that is not specific enough, other than the honor of being allowed to lead.)
Is another reframe for this column, too much recognition or too much appreciation?
Thanks Dan for the petri dish and all for their ‘cultures’, I have been revisiting older posts more frequently– what a wealth of ideas, concepts, values.
Hi Doc.. Hear what you are saying and yes personal notes get a lot of mileage and I do that for birthdays and anniversaries, kids graduation etc. However for work related accomplishments especially when I know it is something the individual cares about well that requires a face to face in my mind i.e. Breakfast or lunch with the CEO or the MD (me) with a personal ” Hey there thank you for your hard work; thank you for being an owner and not a renter; thank you for “taking care of us” and most of all “thank you for being here and making us all proud.” Those folks will be telling their grand kids about that meal and their loyalty will be carved in marble never to be erased or marred in any way. Now would you not work or stay with an organization that treated their associates and partners that way? I would hope so. Thanks, Al
Hi, I have a question. If in the workplace, a person (not referring to me but someone else) works very hard, is loyal, has contributed major suggestions and information to the business, yet is treated disrespectfully and others take credit for his work, how would he approach the leadership? Currently, he is taking everything hard and is about to give up and quit. The workplace for him is a daily slap in the face regardless of what he does. I would like to explain more, but it is my family’s business and I cannot stand injustice, yet many do not have a say. Many egos involved. I pray alot but feel totally helpless to help or make a difference.
Thank you for any wisdom you can impart. I believe as John Maxwell says, that “Everything rises and fall on leadership”. I am not employed by my family but do not know how to advise one in a situation as this.
Thank you.
FYI — Susan’s question motivated this post:
http://leadershipfreak.wordpress.com/2010/08/30/correcting-the-boss/
Hi Dan,
I really find it interesting (worrisome) that some “leaders” might think that it’s possible to praise too much.
I would suggest that these people review the studies that Dan Pink refers to in Drive! (I haven’t read it yet but it’s purchased and is #2 in my list right now).
A great intro is the RSA Animate on the subject : http://comment.rsablogs.org.uk/2010/04/08/rsa-animate-drive/
Cheers !
Eric
@ericjacques
Hey Eric,
Love Pink’s work and thanks for leaving a link to a classic animated talk by the RSA folks.
You are an encourager,
Best to you,
Dan