Breathing Life into the Walking Dead
Image source by David Wagner
Leaders with nowhere to grow are blind, self-indulgent fools. They’re the walking dead.
Every time you know more than those around you, growth stops – death begins.
I spent most of my early leadership years believing I was someone I wasn’t. I felt smarter and more skilled than I actually was. Others were the problem, not me. I repeated ineffective behaviors because I was “right.”
Those who focus on changing others while neglecting their own growth, become the walking dead.
Leaders who aren’t developing leadership skills believe they’ve arrived. Sound dangerous? It’s worse than dangerous; it’s zombie land. Unleash growth by feeling dissatisfaction with your current leadership skills.
Dissatisfaction with others is easy.
Dissatisfaction with self, stings.
Forget balance, it’s for weaklings and milquetoasts. Jump overboard when it comes to growing your leadership skills.
- Observe yourself. Imagine you’re floating in the corner of your office invisibly watching. Monitor interactions. Observe responses from others. Are you inspiring?
- Serve others so others can serve others. Growth happens when you help others grow. Enabling “others to serve others” requires humility. Share your skills. Provide opportunities for others, don’t take them for yourself. “Serving others so they can serve others” means helping them do things you easily do.
- Take personal assessments. My leadership coach, Bob Hancox, recently gave me the ProD Leadership assessment. I recommend it.
- Grow content with discontent. Growth is on the other side of average. Mediocre leaders fear letting go of average.
- Personally own your aspirations for exponential impact. Just say it! Don’t hang your head in false humility. Tell someone you want to matter. Embrace your ache for meaning, don’t snuff it out.
Life always means growth. What isn’t growing is dead.
What prevents leaders from growing?
How can leaders grow their own leadership skills and potential?
Good morning and excellent post Dan. So important it is to surround ourselves with people that we can learn from, especially when the experience is mutual amongst peers. ‘Enabling “others to serve others”’ does require humility, but is such a great pleasure and an honor to be able to do so.
Thank you for your contribution today and for all the twitter support you give. Much appreciated.
Reading your comment made me think about learning from those I feel superior to. It’s been a mental shift to stop feeling superior and become a learner which seems synonymous with listening.
I totally agree, once we’ve shifted to enabling others to serve others it’s very gratifying. For me, it was an important step.
Not to get too deep but live spelled backwards is evil.
Stagnation is where mold grows. Enough mold and it stuffs life out.
Remember 95% of what is really going on we are completely unaware of. You reading this have any idea how many involuntary actions are going on in your body right now keeping you alive and thinking……how many of them are you actually aware of as they are happening?
The humility of knowing how little you really know is quite refreshing once you get adjusted to it. Your next great accomplishment comes from the 95% you do not know, not just from feeling frustrated. Use the energy that comes with the frustration to fuel your desire to get what is next.
If I am not always engaged personally in relentlessly learning and adapting the world is leaving me behind. Plus the world is still chugging along if I am disilusioned by thinking I got it. Be aware of wonder.
Get something great done or just something, then NEXT!
Motion creates emotion so got to keep moving.
All beliefs for me are subject to intense scrutiny in my world. There is no separation and no short cuts to getting better. What I mean is I can’t be super whiz bang dude at work and a total jerk in my personal, not work related relationships. There is no separation.
I am the first person I meet in every situation I encounter.
So yeah, the biggest room in my house is the one for self improvement. Be the change I have identified, don’t just be great at whining about it,
Leaders who are all human beings, allegedly, can realize all growth starts by deeply reflecting on ourselves. Folks do not grow cause they want to coast, just the human condition don’t work that way.
After reflection though comes a time for action! Gotta DO something.
Now time for me to go chase the windmills!
SP OUT!
Thank you Scott.
A couple of things in your comment got real traction in my thinking… Love the expression “relentless learning”
I can’t say the shift to serving others so they can serve others has been a once-and-done act. I see a wide swath of selfishness in my heart. Not proud of that but it’s true. I have to keep learning that it’s not about me.
Yeah but see Dan when you are at least having that conversation with yourself how far and wide that separates you from most of the lunkheads occupying space and time with us!!! LOL
One thing I have found is there is a fine line between your life being all about you. Sometimes people wanting to overdo their goody two shoes attitude take it a bit far.I am so selffish this and that….blah blah blah. Your life IS about you, who else?
Many times in my 12 Step Experience the same do-gooder attitude makes people goofy. My folks like to say, “my best day drunk was worse than my worst day sober”?
Really? Not me, some of the best tiomes I ever had I can hardly remember at all and some of the worst days I have ever had have been completely sober and clean! People just forget there is a start difference between enthusiasm and stupidity. hehe
Anyway, from what I can see since stumbling onto your blog you are a good guy, sharp too. I look forward to starting out each day with you helping me get my thinker into gear.
Not sure each day you have been pleased with that result but that is ok I am not everyone’s desired taste, at least noit everyday!
Anyway, have a great day!
Back to relentlessly pursuing whatever I was doing before I decided to respond to you.
SP OUT!
Excellent blog, I have shared this with my network
Thanks Lou.
Dan,
Thanks! Agree about zombie land. All your articles somehow make me immediately think …. ‘am I a zombie?’ ‘am I an egomaniac?’ Especially good is your exhortation to have your own goals and want to matter.
But I disagree that balance is for weaklings. It’s easy to hide at work and just give everything over to the company. It’s hard to serve the family, the company, the world, and any other things that you personally may be signed up for in this life. In my group, only the strong have the guts to go on vacation. My goal is to be that tough this year. My family deserve my attention too.
Kind regards!
Thank you Catie.
My writing makes me wonder the same things. 🙂
Thanks for extending the definition of balance. I still want to be out of balance when it comes to my passion for developing my own leadership. Sounds like egomania… ugh
Cheers
Life is about the overcoming. I’ve said this before. Everything in nature points to this. If you’re not overcoming something, if you’re not challenged by something, you’re simply not only not living, but not thriving.
Thank you Julia.
“overcoming” is a powerful metaphor for growth. It feels challenging and fulfilling. It feels like life.
Cheers
Dear Dan,
Dissatisfaction with others is easy, but with self, stings, is really powerful statement. Those who dissatisfy with others, generally see themselves better than others. They feel that they know more than others and they do not need to learn anything. This comes from their unawareness, incompetency and perhaps their attitude. They are full of arrogance, ego and that comes from fear to look inside. They are fearful at looking at their actions, decision and behaviour. They justify it by all the means, but point others with great justifications. And this attitude prevents leaders from growing. I agree with you that such leaders need to imbibe humility. Humility is a power attribute that has potential to grow leadership skills and character.
I believe that dissatisfaction with self is motivator. Dissatisfaction with other is sucker. And dissatisfaction without action is defeat. But dissatisfaction with enhanced effort is winning and lead to right path.
Thank you Ajay.
“Dissatisfaction without action is defeat” KaChing!
I might add that it could also be delusion.
Ka-ching, you knocked it out of multiple parks today Dan! Entropy happens!
Your #1 point of observe yourself from a corner is a great skill to develop and lifetime to master. If you want to get to a point of unconditional positive regard, that perspective is needed in an ongoing manner. Very hard to do when the emotional rivers start running at higher tides.It may be one of those cases of dual vision…try to watch from afar and then re-engage and back. It is an uncomfortable mirror but so valuable. It can be practiced in low key social interactions too. Are you really hearing what the other person is saying or are you already planning your response? Ouch.
Milquetoast Dan, wow! 1950s dysphemism!! One might wonder if you developed a case of matutolypea this morning. (had to dig to find that one!) 😉
Why do I see a Far Side cartoon of zombie CEOs milquetoasting around saying “staaaaattttus quoooooo….staaaaatusss quooooo”
Thank you Doc.
You sent me off to look up matutolypea… Frankly, I can have a bad mood any time of day. 🙂
“Entropy happens” oooo gotta love that one too.
I find the times I should observe myself the most are the times I least likely to do it. But it’s an aspiration.
You got me laughing again… thanks. Even I can’t be in a bad mood after reading your contribution.
I like this – reminds me of a quote (John Maxwell, I think): “As long as you’re growing you’re green…once you think you’re ‘ripe,’ all you can do is rot.”
Great quote! Ripe fruit only rots.
I have not heard of the ProD Leadership Assessment. Can you give more details?
Hi Sue, here is the website. http://www.taiinc.com/ click on the assessments tab. I’d be glad to share more of my experience…feel free to drop a note. dan at leadershipfreak dot com
To extend the zombie theme, this is also a “disease” you pass on to others.
Thank you Justin.
I’m starting to feel queezie.. 🙂
I have a terrible confession to make, Dan, right here on your post . . . I can never remember a time when I thought I knew more than those around me (except for maybe when I was 9 and my younger twin brothers were 4). I don’t try to fool anyone by faking knowledge. I’ve been in leadership roles for long enough and in enough different settings, that I recognize the value in telling people up front that I am not a specialized expert. I lead a staff right now, all of whom have greater expertise in their various specialties than I do.
For me, there is a certain adrenaline-producing aspect to leading people who you know are more technically — and maybe even more intellectually — qualified than you. I love it; and I make no qualms about it. I can’t program. I can’t design. I can’t recite word after word of jargon-filled business language. I can’t make excel spreadsheets do loop-the-loops. And I don’t want to, because I CAN lead all the people who do those things. I can advocate for them. I can have their backs. I can run interference for them. I can be a sounding board for them. I can provide motivation and encouragement, and be enabling.
But this also means I have to constantly be paying attention and learning; otherwise I’m leading with no one following. (As an example of this, here I am at age 62, working toward an advanced degree.)
Thank you Scott.
I find your contribution compelling, encouraging, and challenging.
BTW, I earned my MBA when I was in my 50’s 🙂
I have often wondered what makes people “old”, and how us baby boomers are going to avoid this trap. Here is an example – today’s blog! Are you actively looking for new things to learn and contribute? Are you actively looking for ways to inspire others to learn and contribute? Your work is NEVER DONE!
Thank you Betty.
“Old” is all around…sad but true. Lets keep learning.
I got a laugh when I read , “jump overboard when it comes to Leadership skill’s”, I don’t recall the autor , but ‘Love’ & believe his quote – (If your tired of wait’n for your ship to come in, swim out n get it! ) You just have to ask yourself, “am I willing to swim through the sharks to get to the sunk’n treasure”?
Thank you Steve,
Love the swim out and get it attitude. You strike me as one who considers the sharks but as willing to swim through, too.
Hi Dan,
Great post. But there can be occasions when your aspirations as a leader may not sync with the organisational plans.What is the way forward then?
Shakti
Thank you Shakti.
So true. Not in sync is a reality. Of course, completely in sync is rare also.
I’d ask how much out of sync am I?
Can I live with it?
Express concerns privately, clearly, and humbly.
This is one challenge middle managers face. They have to own decisions from higher ups that they may not have had input in making.
If things don’t change and the difference is big enough, what option is there but to move on?
Doscendo discimus – We learn by teaching.
powerful