If You Want to Motivate Someone, Shut Up
Raise your hand if you say, “I know you can do it,” to motivate. Recent research suggests that feeling like you can’t motivates more than feeling like you can.
Verbal encouragement may not be
as encouraging as you believe.
Brandon Irwin’s research indicates that working out in the gym with someone who is better than you motivates more than having someone egg you on with verbal encouragement.
Motivate by pairing with someone more proficient.
Why it works:
“A big reason why superior partners are motivating is that people want to compare favorably with others.” (Brandon Irwin interview in HBR July-August 2013)
Surprise:
Surprisingly, exercise partners were virtual, on a screen. Even more surprising, silent virtual exercise partners were more motivational than vocal. It seems that comparing ourselves with someone more proficient motivates, especially if they aren’t encouraging us verbally.
Teams:
Irwin studied motivation as it relates to virtual teams as well. The feeling of being part of a virtual team motivated most of all.
Affiliation with a team where your behaviors impact team
performance motivates most powerfully.
Irwin said, “What we think is that the feeling of being indispensable, which results from the shared goal, makes you work harder, especially when you know you’re the weaker link in the team. The bond becomes stronger.”
Implication:
Irwin’s research focuses on exercise but his results suggest that organizational leaders:
Motivate best by pairing weak team members with strong.
My experience indicates that working with high performers – people outperforming me – raised my game. How about you?
What are the pros and cons of pairing weak with strong?
What success factors are most relevant when pairing weak with strong?
Kansas State University news release: http://bit.ly/11ukW3T
What an interesting post. As a teacher I’ve experienced the validity in this. But I still think it’s best to pair weak performers with strong and yet encouraging partners. Encouragement doesn’t have to be vocal. Some of our greatest encouragers are role models without many words. They are just good at what they do and they make us want to also be good
But skilled performers who put others down DEmotivate. They cause others to disengage. (Even THIS doesn’t have to be vocalized. It’s an attitude).
Dauna
Thanks for adding an educators perspective to this topic.
It makes sense to me that attitude matters. Irwin’s research was interesting when it came to vocal encouragement. He said that generalized encouragement didn’t help but he believes verbal encouragement that includes the persons name is more effective. Interesting…
I agree, pairing people of different skill levels is good; but to ensure success of the process, it’s important that the stronger one know that he/she needs to set a positive example — and be encouraging and empowering.
Accomplishing this can be a challenge, because many people in more powerful positions got there by stepping on and over those less powerful, less assertive.
Great points Scott. Some high performers are jerks.
I’ll add that Irwin’s research indicates we should use their name when we say encouraging things. “Scott, you’re making an awesome point,” is better than, “You’re making an awesome point.” I think I should write about the power of using names tomorrow. 🙂
Totally agree with you on this. We also have to take in consideration that the most skilled person might not enjoy paring with the weakest one…
Dan…I also like to pair the young and the old or the unexperienced and the experienced. It gives different perspectives to a problem or task.
Great point Larry. I’m such a fan of connecting with young leaders. Plus, think of how helpful it is to hang with someone who’s already done what you’re trying to do… Thanks
Excellent post. Very practical in guiding how to use the power of being in a group to elevate individual performance. Pairing is good because it’s simple to set up.
I agree with Dauna that the attitude of the “higher tier peer” has a big influence. I see this even with my two sons (3 years apart) — when the older/more competent presents himself as an example, the younger one aspires to be like him and doubles down on his efforts; but when the older one gloats in his superior skills, the younger one “checks out” and finds another game.
Great illustration W. I’m thankful you shared your insights. I was the oldest and can see how gloating defeats. Cheers
GREAT STUFF TODAY DAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Told you when you hit it our of the park I will sing your praises.
Been sharing with more words and longer than most of the folks here what to hear! I get it! But MAYBE ONE person might benefit lifelong from what I have to share. Sorry but that means the others of you got to put up with me.
Helping ONE is more important to me than irritating the many.
So show folks with your actions, not flap your gums. Horray!
Second thing I cannot motivate ANYONE. Boy what a difference that made to me when I finally GOT THAT.
I can INSPIRE another by living my life based on the inspiration I get from my Higher Power.
If others see that as attractive then they can ask me what I did and do what I did and get the same result.
Attract not promote, works better in my experience.
I can’ WANT them or encourage them or motivate or make them do ANYTHING.
It is misplaced to think I can.
Isn’t that the point this dude made. Virtual, people watched, not had dummies flapping their gums telling them they ought to do what most likely they are not doing themselves?
Oh the HUMANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Actions can’t flap gums! Feet got no gums! Walk, don’t talk.
Pros and cons, of strong versus weak………weak.
Pro for ME, INSPIRED paired with WILLING.
Am I really the only person who reads that and sees the disctinction? Really?
if so here come the thumbs downers with no explanation and no accountability!!!!!! LOL
For me there are no relevant success factors pairing weak and strong or strong and weak, wrong construct.. Ok less effective construct for the easily offended who can’t take hearing they are wrong. There are infinite factors pairing INSPIRED and WILLING.
Ok if you were a basketball coach and your team shot an average of 30% and there was an assistant coach who taught players to shoot 72% what would you do? You are doing it right now.
Try harder at the techniques that bring you 30%? Or hire that coach to teach your players to shoot 72%?
The BEST your 30% technique is EVER gonna be able to do is get you 30%. EVER. Topped out, THAT is what it can do for you.
When your players find out you coulda got this new assistant who could have helped them get to 72% what you think they gonna think of you? Why did my coach not want to show me the way I could be better? What was he thinking?
I hope they transfer cause they will be better in spite of your neglect to show them a better way.
Better way………People Centric Leadership
Figures don’t lie, just some liars don’t figure.
I Concur!
Great post today Dan
Shifterp back to the Present
Dan: Pairing weak with strong may motivate the weaker partner – but what about the stronger one? We suggest creating a herd dynamic rather than a pair where each member of the team acts as a mentor to someone – with the team leader mentoring to the top performers and the new people just learning = and gaining their own mentee when they have built their skills.
Thanks Sharon. I was thinking of mentoring when I wrote the post but when I went back I was struck by how that isn’t part of this research. I think you are right to emphasize the importance of mentoring but these ideas seem much simpler. I think I’ll reach out the Brandon Irwin and get the latest from him. If I get a chance, I’ll ask about mentoring. Cheers
If you have a chance ask him if they have studied the impact on the mentor – with an electronic “coach” only the subject’s improvements would be measured. A serious flaw in pairing weak with strong might be demotivating the stronger employee… I’ve seen attempts at this with Sales team that failed terribly – staff were paid based on performance and bonuses depended on ranking.. so the stronger sales people resented the time and sales lost when they mentored. Rewards and recognition, incentives etc are all part of the picture. The gap I see in the research is that the impact on the stronger partner cannot be measured.
got it… thanks
I think I can…I think I can…I think I can…
I knew I could…I knew I could…
Thanks for the post about this research. Insights on motivation are helpful on many levels. My experience coaching and facilitating hundreds of business improvement teams certainly confirms the value of pairing more capable people with those needing some improvement.
But I don’t see this as being about people holding negative views (“I think I can’t…) somehow getting more motivation than those willing to try. People need to feel supported, encouraged, and hopeful. They need to believe in the value to them and others, of the stuff they have to do. And they need to believe that they can get better/stronger through their efforts.
In the end, I agree with the renowned community improvement leader Angela Blanchard: “you can’t build on broken.” Help your people see what assets and strengths they do have, and help them use those assets to grow in their work and lives.
A lot of “motivation” FEELS so condescending. While it isn’t the intention of the motivator, they are often little more than noise from the sidelines, distracting and frustrating someone in the midst of a challenge.
The article is right! I feel most motivated when working with someone better than me; I learn and grow and excel. Love this post, Dan.
So in other words Justin you were willing, not weak and the person you learned from inspired you, they were not stronger than you?
Right?
Just think words are very important because they have clearly defined meanings.
Just saw willing and inspired when I read what you wrote.
Right?
SP
Great post. I am a believer in doing not talking. And in the day and age everyone being the best at everything this article is a breath of fresh air. Different motivations work on different people.
“Different motivations work on different people”. I have found this to be so true – as people seem to be motivated by different expected rewards/returns -what do I get out of doing this- such as knowledge, status, money, acceptance, safety etc. The expected return is what triggers/motivates us to move. And, without motivation, it really doesn’t matter who we pair people with.
Great post that challenges some of my current understanding of motivation.
Having read “Drive” by Daniel Pink, in which he discusses how diffent methods of motivating work for simple tasks (yoga in front of a tv) vs. complex tasks (member of a football team), I’m curious if this research was mostly about simple tasks, like individual workouts, or included complex tasks like teamwork?
Thanks Jeffrey. Drive is great and so is Pink’s last book, “To Sell is Human”
I believe Irwin’s work included a team component. But, it centered on exercise. I sent an email requesting an interview. Stay tuned
I think this hits the nail on the head. When I see my boss working his butt off, it certainly motivates me to keep the pace. When you feel your boss works at a less than inspiring pace, it can trickle down through your team
thanks…you can’t beat the power of example.
I find this to be true, in my experiencs as an amateur runner. When my husband comes with me on a run, he is always faster and his endurance levels are greater than mine. I have a better run when I run with him than alone, because I find myself wanting to keep up. He inspires me to be greater than I could ever be on my own! To run further and longer, and he doesn’t have to say one word!
Thank you for sharing!!
I thnk motivation is internal, and recognition is external.
As other have said, this has tremendous implications for education. How we speak to our students really does matter, and a school’s culture can circle around this issue of “motivation”. I have found that witnessing another person’s effort can be encouraging, even if I am silent. Thanks for this.
Dear Dan,
An out-of-box thinking which should work really work well! The best thing what I have experienced is setting your own example. ‘Walk the talk’ is also seem to work wonders for many.
Mixing up low performers with performing team is risky too. t
Inspirational, encouraging talks also have good impact if these are delivered by successful leaders and who have earned the respect for being trusted.
All good and excellent stuff. My work with team building totally supports these kinds of conclusions and anecdotes. The only missing framework on this performance thing is that concept of FLOW, which I think links in perfectly.
I blogged some simple stuff about it at http://performancemanagementcompanyblog.com/2013/05/23/thoughts-on-building-a-high-performance-environment-teamwork-and-flow/
and I think that those thoughts on challenges and the related skills matches in perfectly.
We ARE verbal creatures, and we also engage in a lot of self-talk that can go positive or negative and dramatically affect performance. Motivation, the real stuff, is intrinsic anyway…
.
Yes. I am challenged by stronger people. That’s why I keep smarter, stronger people in my circle. They make me grow.
Reblogged this on IAm Synt and commented:
Yes. I am challenged by stronger people. That’s why I keep smarter, stronger people in my circle. They make me grow.
We never know who is watching.
Working with higher performers absolutely raises my game. Partly because I want to learn and partly because I want to be just like them. There usually something that is special about what they do and we want that.
Sue Bock
http://couragetoadventure.com/blog
Excellent post! Motivation is key to making any team work, as long as their is great chemistry between all the team members and they can push each other to succeed, that makes a successful team.