How to Find Your Nut
Fill in the blank, “All I care about is _______.” If you can’t complete it, you’re just going through the motions.
A person going in many directions ends up going nowhere.
What if you don’t know?
You know what you care about, but maybe you forgot.
The enemy of meaningful activity is doing meaningless activities. Choose your nut – the thing you care most about – then do what matters. A squirrel without a nut has lost his way.
If you don’t know what you care most about, put your energy into figuring it out.
Space:
I asked my coach, Bob Hancox, what he cared most about. He said, “Creating the space for people to find clarity.” It’s not surprising that he had helped me find clarity moments before.
Elimination:
In order to do what matters you must stop doing what doesn’t matter.
- Write down your top five priorities for the day.
- Identify the priority that most aligns with all you care about?
- Draw a line through the other priorities. You must do things that matter in order to become a leader who matters.
- Spend an hour working exclusively on the priority that most aligns with all you care about. Turn off email. Don’t answer the phone. Forget social media. Do what matters, without distraction, for at least an hour.
*Adapted from, Essentialism.
Leaders who haven’t decided all they care about, are distracted, diluted, and frustrated.
3 requirements for success:
- Complete the sentence, “All I care about is ________.”
- Evaluating the way you use time and energy by “all you care about is _______.”
- Eliminate activities that are disconnected from what you care about.
Nothing can stop you when you’re serving the thing you most care about.
How might you complete, “All I care about is ______.”
My statement: All I care about is helping people develop themselves.
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I’m excited to announce a partnership with Clarity Development Consulting to offer the proven “Coaching for Engagement” program. Drop me an email if you’d like to explore Bob Hancox and me coming to your organization.
All I care about is “using my time wisely”. Wasted motions as you have mentioned are exactly what is portrayed, spinning your wheels and going nowhere. Priority has always worked well for me, the rest falls in place most of the time. Sometimes the nut just rolls and you don’t catch up in a timely fashion, perseverance will get you there.
Thanks Tim. What’s more frustrating than wasting time? Thanks for jumping in.
I will do it in 3 steps:
#1. AllI care about is develop my business model.
#2. All I care about is spread the word out about it.
#3. All I care about is implement and deliver it to the public.
Thanks “your.” I see your progression. #3 becomes #1. 🙂
…People! And that’s the way it is for me. I do a lot for people, but keep also in mind what I need from people. I am not selfish. I like to talk, act and do things with people. I take and give. But mostly I care for people.
Thanks Dennis. I feel the heart and compassion in your response. It feels great. Best for the journey.
Thanks a lot Dan.
Thanks Dan
– it is always a challenging question for me anyway. I can still only get it down to 4 – Understanding, Compassion, Efficiency and Action. My worst days (the ones I’m least satisfied with) are when I fall short on the last 2 – the first 2 happen without thinking (can you understand without thinking, I guess you can).
I guess in terms of turning that into a statement – I care about those things in myself and developing them in others.
congrats on the partnership that sounds very exciting, and i know it’s well deserved.
Develop away…
Richard
Thanks Richard. The tension between compassion and action is central to the leadership dance. Just seeing it is important. Navigating that tension is one of leaderships highest challenges. I’m not surprised that you bring up such an important issue. It’s a pleasure being on the journey with you.
All I care about is developing systems to aid felons and reduce recidivism. Got it!
KaPow! Thanks Emily.
As a fellow coach I love this post Bob. All I care about is “shifting the lives of people to the possibility of living and leading essentially.” What occurs to me as i read this is once committing to your priority notice what you allow to get in the way of achieving it. It won’t be something outside of you, although it may seem that way at first. It will likely be one of our inner voices telling us something like “who do you think you are to decide what you should do next?”
Thanks Ian. It’s fascinating that we talk ourselves out of the things that matter most. Or, we do what matters least BEFORE what matters most. “I’m just going to get this out of the way.” BUT, by the end of the day, we never get to what matters most.
All the major battles are inside us. 🙂
Thanks for the thoughtful response Dan (and I want to apologize for calling you Bob last reply). I spend much of my time as a coach with people who have defined their purpose/passion/interests yet still have much trouble bringing them to the forefront. The biggest barriers appear as our inner board of directors telling us why we won’t succeed – stay with what you know.
To me, this also equates to passion. That is what will motivate unbridled energy and enthusiasm. I am passionate about collaborating with architects and designers with the common goal of creating efficient and beautiful environments.
Thanks Kass. Isn’t it great to have focus? 🙂 Cheers!
All I care about is helping people find true freedom and lasting joy.
I love this and the reflection it creates. Thank you. All I care about is supporting people in understanding themselves and others.
All I care about is successfully living a purposeful life.
This is scary – these decisions take some soul searching
All I care about is pleasing God.
You’re absolutely right and on target, Dan.
Can you imagine someone going up to a ticket window at a bus station, asking for a ticket somewhere, and the ticket person says “Where to, Sir?” And the traveler says, “Anywhere?”
Or, a person who knows she wants to go New York City but can’t decide if she wants to travel by bus, plane or train…will she ever get there?
Worst of all is the person who neither knows where he wants to go…or how he wants to get there??!!!##
And like you say, it all boils down to that simple yet profound question: What do I care about?
What makes me come alive? I’ll define, describe and write it down in specific detail?
I work in a job where I rotate to other assignments in new locations every 2-3 years. As my current assignment is drawing to a close, my number one priority is to leave behind something that matters. I’m working hard to tie up loose ends and to leave something behind programmatically that people will remember was uniquely mine.
Ooh good one, Cheryl. Leaving something behind that matters….you’re a born leader. And clearly a responsible, empathetic team member.
Thanks dan for the post, All i care about is bringing solution to the doorstep of people, seeing them smile gives me more joy. Because when people are happy, the world becomes a better place to live.
hope to learn more from you.