Solution Saturday: Help! My Boss is Incompetent
Dear Leadership Freak,
My boss drives me crazy. He’s incompetent. He has no people skills. The trouble is the people upstairs think he’s doing a good job.
Sincerely,
Frustrated with incompetence!
Dear Frustrated,
The people upstairs think bosses are doing a great job when they deliver great results. Sometimes, leaders are willing to sacrifice relationships for results.
First, learn how to deliver results from your boss. Ignore his weakness. Focus on his strength. What is your boss doing to deliver great results. Try emulating some of those behaviors, even if they might feel awkward at first.
The behavior you haven’t tried is the one that will take you to the next level.
Your boss is great at something. How might you learn from him?
Second, here’s a list of five behaviors to avoid. Don’t:
- Complain to the boss’s boss. The exception is ethical violations.
- Try to fix your bad boss.
- Take it personally. Don’t take frustration with your boss home with you.
- Pull back or slack off. Never let a bad boss be the reason you sabotage your career.
- Don’t stay too long.
Third, always begin with tenderness and compassion. If you’re a direct person, tone it down. Show empathy for the stresses your boss may be under.
Fourth, suggest development programs that help everyone, including your boss. If your boss is lousy at relationships, suggest a training program on emotional intelligence, for example.
Fifth, always work to make things better.
Define “better” within the boundaries of things you control.
You’re frustrated because someone else isn’t doing what they should do. Focus on doing things you should do.
You have my best for the journey,
Leadership Freak
What suggestions do you have for “Frustrated?”
Or, at least as often, executives are willing to sacrifice results for relationships, as long as they aren’t really being held accountable for results.
Thanks Douglas. You make me think about the importance of expecting both strong relationships and results.
Brilliant suggestion to see and learn from your boss about that boss’ strong points. As you note, the boss has to have one. This might even lead to a relationship that could lead to Frank and honest discussion.
And then there is the boss that has been promoted to her / his level of incompetence. That’s where your fifth suggestion is so important – working to make things better, in spite of the boss’ incompetence!!!
Thanks John. I appreciate you taking these ideas to a new level. Most of us have been in a situation where our frustrations close our minds to opportunities.
It feels so important because so much of life is spent at work.
Thanks again for adding to the conversation.
Be wary. If your boss’s great strength is that he/she utterly lacks empathy and therefore is the go-to person to ride roughshod over more junior staff. Do you really want to become a hatchet man?
Thanks Mitch. We might debate if that is a strength. 🙂
I had a situation many years ago where I took the bit between the teeth and applied to undertake a year long training management/leadership program paid for by the organisation. This helped put me in a position where I started to add real value to our part of the organisation. This in turn inspired my boss to subsequently undertake the same program. The outcome: together we transformed the services he was responsible for and ultimately helped us both to become CEOs
Thanks Sean. It’s great to hear a success story. Congratulations!
OK, I am one of those bosses bosses. None of the employees of bosses that report to me have any idea what I am doing or have done to improve this type of manager. I have been fortunate enough to turn around several managers that fit the issues listed in this article. Their employees eventually noticed changes in their management style and found them easier to work for. Managers I couldn’t fix were eventually gone, much to the surprise of their staff.
It is important to communicate with the next level of management beyond ethical issues. There is a difference between complaining and constructive criticism. Better senior managers want and need fact based information that will help the organization and managers that need improvement. Otherwise all we have to go on is numbers.
One number I do look at regularly is turnover. A manager that consistently has above average turnover is doing something that will damage the company in the long run. Often the only people that know exactly what needs to be fixed are his or her employees.
My advice, don’t complain, do communicate.
When I first began visiting inmates in prisons many years ago, I was shocked at how bright, well-read and well-spoken many of them were. It was a wonder to me why and how they landed and ended-up behind bars. Today, I think I know the answer: They are “competent incompetents.” Perhaps the same can be true of some leaders and managers…persons who are incompetent in leading a staff toward achieving the organization goal, but are extremely competent in the politics of delivering good news to hierarchy.
Oh, what to do with the frustration and angst of having to deal with a “politician” as one’s leader or manager? If only we didn’t have to see, hear or feel him or her—or we could know they were in a different location. Nope! None of this helps…because the enemy is us.
The issue is between positive and negative perfectionism: The former is adaptive and healthy, the latter maladaptive and neurotic. So dramatically different in their underlying nature and ramifications that one must be known as optimalism, and the other simply as “perfectionism.” Optimalism as an ideal is both a distant star that guides us and a distant shore to be reached. Optimalism is much like living the good life: The good life is process and state of being. It is both direction and destination.
Perfection is what we strive for, even though perfection is impossibility. However, “striving” for perfection is not an impossibility. We must do the best we can under the conditions that exist. That’s what counts.
If we want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal–not to people or objects.
Think wellness. “All-ways” think wellness and goodness.
Excellent update this week Dan! What I like most about this update is that it focuses on what we can do, rather than focusing on trying to directly change our bosses. If we are the boss, we can also learn much from the article. Are we sacrificing relationships for results? It is a short term mistake that any leader can make if he or she gets too wrapped up in the accolades and rewards from the higher-ups.
I believe that our military coined the term “situational awareness”, which definitely applies here. If the boss is new to their job and is trying to make an impression, employees may get on his/her right side by providing some insight on how things run and how to get things done. Dan is absolutely correct in that seldom will a higher up admit to having hired the wrong person, so escalating the situation may have the opposite effect the employee intended.
If, on the other hand, the boss has grown up in the organization, look at who they learned their management skills from. Is the entire organization of the “my way or the highway” school of management? If so, start looking for a new position. You will be miserable while you are employed there, and there is a good likelihood that the company won’t survive for long.
Dear Frustrated,
We do not get what we want always. The first thing you are required to do is to learn to accept the hard facts of life. Once you have done this half the battle is won. Having done this try and adapt with your boss who may seem outright lousy. Remember one thing. He has not become boss just like that. He has it in him. Give up only as a last resort when everything fails.mI have gone through a bad Boss in my career except that he was outright brilliant and all the idiosyncrasies and arrogance attached with was there. He will never accept anything you do and will do everything to put you off. I managed him for 6 years before I finally gave up. You need to persist. Grass is always green on the other side.
Dear Freak
These comments covers off many similar circumstances, however what do you do when a leader is put in place, not to lead the current team, but for reasons on the belief he is bringing on new products. The leader is compensated on the new product (in 3 years this product never came about) vs on the divisions current operations and metrics. This leader was a very direct and outspoken person (who had no previous leadership skills) who finger pointed to everyone else for the lack of profitability (vs significant lower results driven by current economic climate). Everyone was compensated on current divisional results, yet he enjoyed the corporate compensation plan which was driven by corporate results (corporate was doing much better than division due to natural economic climate).
We engaged in a process and role review, outlined communication strategy, while providing key goals and metrics. The division met all the non-economic goals, divisional mandates. Ultimately the entire team was driven to please this leader vs what was good for the division. Many areas had implementations, which were thought of as improvements (however the reality was a lot of funds were spent with no current or future value added to the business to be recognized. As each team member left, the workload went onto others until someone was eventually hired. Corporate Senior leaders disregarded this whole scenario for 3 years, due to the fact the company’s overall culture is very suspect. My resolve as a leader on this team was to complete each project, challenge the goals of these projects, highlight the risk to the business, be realistic in terms of identifying the value added components, while running the day to day operations. Ultimately this leader did not like the challenges I presented, thinking he knew best, thus providing me a package deal out. Since then he has eventually decimated the division where 15 of 18 individuals left, and 6 months later this leader was shown the door when the new products never materialized.
There always will be certain leaders who do not match the team and who cannot be pleased, who lacks the responsibility, respect, integrity and communication ability to manage a team. If the organization does not support the entire team, then you are better off somewhere else. The leader in these types of scenario is usually the last to go, unless the top leaders have a pulse on all areas of the business. Which gets us back to relationships. The best managed companies typically have the top leaders engaging with all parts of the organization on a frequent basis.
As a supervisor, much strength is required to guard how you speak and interact with your employees. You can never please everyone who works for you. It requires much time to earn the respect and buy-in of your employees–and it can be torn down in one second by something you say or do which is taken the wrong way. I strive to be both a strong leader and a leader who serves…because I want to be the boss that I want as an employee. I believe putting everything I do in the service category, even the difficult tasks, helps my employees know that I am not operating on my ego. At the end of the day, my team and I are working together as employees in different roles to achieve the mission of our company. My employees know I will go farther to help them, stay longer to serve them, and stand stronger to see them develop.
Understand who your boss is. It is often not what your boss does. Often he/she does not know him/herself what he/she is really up to! Help him/her.