10 Ways to Make People Feel Powerful
You influence the way people feel about themselves. When you make people feel weak, they act in fear. When you make people feel powerful, they act with boldness.
Boldness takes you further than fear.
3 ways to make people feel weak:
- Assume the worst.
- Express frustration with them.
- Ignore them.
10 ways to make people feel powerful:
- Allow people to influence you. It feels empowering to have influence with a leader.
- Adapt to their ideas.
- Seek feedback. How is it working when I …?
- Seek feedforward. “The next time I lead a meeting, what do you suggest I do to get the team talking with each other?”
- Make everyone feel like an insider. Outsiders lose motivation. Insiders feel connected, respected, and powerful.
- Provide freedom with responsibility.
- Bring up poor performance with optimism. What you ignore is accepted. “I guess it doesn’t matter if I screw up.” What you accept becomes expected.
- Ask how they might challenge themselves.
- Give feedback based on observable behaviors.
- Explore success. What’s working?
- Be more personal than formal. Insiders speak freely with each other.
- Tell a short story. “I remember when….”
- Follow-up with conversations. “The other day we talked about…. How’s that going?”
7 Empowering vs. dis-empowering contrasts:
- What are you learning? vs. You did this wrong.
- What’s next? vs. Do this next.
- What are some options? vs. Here’s what you should do.
- Which alternative seems best to you? vs. This alternative seems best to me.
- What’s happening in your life? vs. Just get it done.
- What would you like to try? vs. Try this.
- I believe you have more in you. vs. It’s time for you to step up.
3 Empowering questions:
- What worked in the past?
- What are your hopes for yourself?
- How have your strengths served you in similar situations?
How might leaders make others feel powerful?
How have leaders made you feel powerful?
Another word / phase you’ve introduced me to: ‘Feedforward’. Feedback is of course so important. But the notion of asking for thoughts on a future event builds relationships and trust. Could also include ‘advice’ such as “Why don’t you give some thought to dealing with ____, maybe along the lines of your contributions to _____.”
And then I liked this also: “Insiders feel connected, respected, and powerful.” I doubt that anyone would consider being an insider if not connected. But as you so clearly make the case in this post, true insiders are respected and made to feel powerful as well!!!
Thanks John. I enjoy reading your thoughts and encouragement.
The idea of feedforward come from Marshall Goldsmith. (Very useful article.)
Here’s to a great week.
How might leaders make others feel powerful? Put them in charge, allow them to direct the project with no intervention. Assuring them that they are trusted and corporate believes they are the best individual for the task. Asking them for their input and using the information provided to enhance the project or meeting.
How have leaders made me feel powerful? Gave me the drawings and told me to run the job, They implemented my suggestions on various occasions, showing me that they are listening. Challenged me beyond my expertise trusting I would make the correct judgements, accomplish the tasks, yet also letting me know they will support me if i overwhelmed.
Absolutely love this post! Thanks Dan. As a leadership development professional, it’s so important to help other with the words that are going to help them achieve the outcomes they are looking for.
Empowered people working in your business are much more effective than those afraid to make a move…because the boss will “explode” . A business is only as good as its leadership…employees can only follow.. I always ask my clients…what kind of a leader are you? One that people will follow gladly..or one that everyone tries to hide from?
Good post. As multiple business owner, teacher and of over 35 plus years I totally agree. Empowered people working in your business are much more effective than those afraid to make a move…because the boss will “explode” . A business is only as good as its leadership…employees can only follow.. I always ask my clients…what kind of a leader are you? One that people will follow gladly..or one that everyone tries to hide from?