How to be Dissatisfied Like a Leader
“Satisfaction is death.” George Bernard Shaw
The only people more dissatisfied than leaders are artists, pubescent teens, and curmudgeons.
“Show me a thoroughly satisfied man and I will show you a failure.” Thomas A. Edison
But:
Dissatisfaction – by itself – only makes life miserable. Yes, dissatisfaction drives change, but it takes more.
I know some dissatisfied people. Only a few of them are leaders. Most use dissatisfaction as an excuse to not try, give up, blame others and wallow in the safe squalor of discontent.
Leaderly dissatisfaction:
The drive to make things better is at the heart of leaderly dissatisfaction.
Leaderly dissatisfaction is driven by what could be, not what was. Putrid discontent, on the other hand, basks in the stench of a dissatisfying past.
Leaderly dissatisfaction believes things could be better. Individuals could matter more. Teams could execute more effectively. Organizations could make a bigger difference.
Complaining:
People who want others to make things better for them complain the most.
The difference between leaders and complainers is leaders smell skunks and dream of perfume. Everyone else runs from the stench.
Organizations are gloomy because we listen too closely to dissatisfaction and too little to aspiration.
Listen and challenge:
Listen to the concerns, complaints, and dissatisfaction of others. Then ask, “What could we do about that?”
“There are two kinds of discontented in this world, the discontented that works and the discontented that wrings its hands. The first gets what it wants and the second loses what it has.” Og Mandino
Nuggets:
- Focus more on aspiration than dissatisfaction. How might dissatisfaction translate into aspiration?
- Turn what you don’t likes into dreams. The more complaints you have, the bigger your dreams might become.
- Hang with people who change things. Avoid do-nothing talkers.
How might leaders deal with their own dissatisfaction? With the dissatisfaction of others?
I think it’s good to to be satisfied or pleased with the progress you & your team are making. But leaders always realize there is more to be done. The status quo can always be improved.
Dissatisfaction is negative. Rather than being negative we need to be optimistic and upbeat about what’s possible–how the furure can be better.
Thanks Paul. It’s that optimism that gives leaders the permission to be dissatisfied. Without it, dissatisfaction is an anchor.
It’s a balancing act to celebrate progress and reach higher. The leaders focus tends toward the latter. But, the former is essential for success.
Show respect for progress. Show respect for the work it took to create progress.
Thanks, Dan. A great reminder of my former self…and one I don’t want to be again.
There was a time when I was a dissatisfied complainer. Things were wrong, but it was all someone else’s fault and things just weren’t fair. But, I realized something. The common denominator in all of my dissatisfaction was me. It was that moment change began. Uncomfortable, scary, and at times incredibly difficult.
Now, when I’m dissatisfied I know (not hope or think) I can do something about it. That holds true for professional and personal lives alike.
Thanks Eric. You have my respect for sharing your story. You nailed it. The path from complaining to personal responsibility is bumpy and painful. Once we get there, we find a new sense of power.
I also find that I complain less. 🙂
Absolutely, Dan. I complain a lot less and my wife is a lot happier when I’m around 🙂
When things go bad–the Theory X Manager—says, They are lazy, careless, irresponsible and not commited.”
When things go bad the Theory Y Manager say, “What could I have done better? What can I learn from this?”
Thanks Paul. I’m glad you brought X and Y theory to the conversation. What do “I” need to change about my leadership/management when team members under-perform? Now that’s a question!!
Dissatisfaction can be a motivating factor rather than a dissuading element for onward progress
Love the graphic. I have found the keen ability among long term leaders to look back and lean on experience as a way to push through the current…as opposed to…creating a better forward looking plan based on lessons learned. When the question is posed…what WILL you, how CAN you… the answer often comes back “What I DID was…”
Thanks Dan as always!