Infatuation with your voice weakens connection, limits influence, and destroys effectiveness.
Brilliant leaders ask forward-facing questions.
Fall in love with the voice of others.
What about blabbermouths?
Don’t use the presence of blabbermouths as an excuse to become one yourself.
Blabbermouths are idiots. I don’t care how smart they are. Confront them. Restrain them. Avoid them. If necessary, remove them.
Curiosity:
Fools talk. Wisdom listens.
I confess that I talk for a living. But the only way to say anything worth hearing is asking questions and attending to answers.
Curiosity changed my life.
When I started writing Leadership Freak I stumbled on something that changed my life.
The second most important thing I gain from writing a popular leadership blog is the opportunity to listen to the thoughts of others. The most important thing I gain from Leadership Freak is the discipline to write my own thoughts.
In February of 2010 a publisher sent me a copy of, “The Leadership Code,” I’d been blogging for about two months. It was the first of hundreds of books to come my way.
I wrote and explained that I wouldn’t mention a book if I hadn’t spoken with the author(s). They went for it. Since then, I’ve had scores of conversations. Some changed my life.
5 ways to practice forward-facing curiosity:
- Bring up the uncomfortable obvious. If someone limps, for example, ask about it. Respectful curiosity establishes connection. Try saying, “I notice.” Then be quiet.
- Ask hard questions. Safe questions never produce remarkable results. When something doesn’t feel right, say, “I’m curious about ….”
- Take notes. Let people know their words matter.
- Push past platitudes and safe theories. Dig into practicalities.
- What would you DO about that?
- How would you … ?
- Focus on the present and future, even if you begin in the past.
How might leaders practice the art of forward-facing curiosity?