Whining Wednesday – Share Your Complaints!
What are your favorite complaints? Go ahead and let loose.
Feel free to type ‘anonymous’ where you put your name when leaving comments.
20 common complaints:
- Self-centered uncaring bosses.
- Weather.
- Politicians.
- Pay.
- Customers.
- Unjust rules and regulations.
- Slow or no Internet connection.
- No cell phone reception.
- Emotional women.
- Uncaring men.
- Telemarketing calls.
- False advertising. The sign says 30% off but it’s only for one item on the shelf!
- Pushy people.
- Difficulty in returning items you purchased.
- Deceptive hiring practices. A job interview is a conversation between two liars.
- Potholes in roads.
- Shoddy workmanship.
- Lack of follow through.
- Being lied to.
- Poorly prepared food.
My favorite complaint is complaining about complainers.
6 challenges:
I feel like I have to leave a challenge. I can’t just let complaining stand on its own.
- The difference between a leader and a complainer is resolve to do something about the complaint.
- The trouble with complaining is we see it in others but not in ourselves. I just walked out of a meeting where one team member realized he complained as much as the people he complains about.
- Complaining about people divides teams. When you voice complaints about team members, others have to choose sides. Will they agree with you or will they side with the person being complained about?
- Complaining about performance enables people to improve, if the conversation turns from the past to the future. Complainers are stuck in the past. Leaders turn toward the future.
- Turn your complaints into positive action or keep your mouth shut.
- The more you complain, the more you want to complain.
Pointing out fault, failure, and defect are essential aspects of leadership. The trouble is some do it like it’s an Olympic sport.
Question:
- Who complains more – men or women?
- How do men’s complaints differ from women’s complaints?
- What are some of your favorite complaints?
I am tired of internal fear hindering my growth. I can’t get out of my own head sometimes.
Wow! That’s powerful George. You aren’t the first to complain about rethinking, over-thinking, and decision anxiety.
I agree as well…self-confidence is everything. Past failures need to be moved out of my head, as I move forward and try to improve each day!
I wouldn’t say move it out of your head, more use it as motivation to do better, for me personally failing or making a mistake is fine as long as you learn something from it and don’t continue making the same mistake. My 2 cents anyway, all the best for you moving forward 🙂
It’s good to move the failure out of your thinking – but only after that failure has been Considered deeply enough to provide learning that will remain useful in addressing meaningful situations (and of course for the same situation resulting in the failure – probably not going to occur however, no matter how many teachers’ approaches encourage students to do so …).
I completely agree. Being in my own head is what stalls me from moving forward, growing and being completely in the moment.
shitty communication!
Tell me what you really think!! 🙂
Judgemental people who have opinions with no thought or knowledge, they judge just because.
Ouch!! Quick to complain…without knowing the whole story!!
all of the above, plus being lied about, being the fall guy for someone else’s poor work
Ouch…. Unjust accusation is so hard to take!
I agree nothing gets me more irritated than being lied about or accused of something I absolutely didn’t do!!!!!
Micro-managers stifle productivity! Many staff have approached this manager to no avail. My solution is to sit back and learn what NOT to do as I continue to develop! Right or Wrong?
Sometimes the best lessons we get from lousy managers is what NOT to do when we earn the position. 🙂
Broad based,” the Doubters” that say “they can’t get this done today and then they get done today”, learn to believe in yourself!
Possibly my biggest pet peeve is individuals who try to avoid change or make an excuse for behavior by saying, “That’s just not who I am.”
I’m with you Kevin. I hate it when people hide behind authenticity.
Ooooo, good one Tim. Yes, believe in yourself.
Leaders who abuse their authority. Especially teachers or other leaders of children.
That one feels scary! Thanks Cindy
Competing priorities!
That’s being pulled in too many directions…and then people expect perfection on each thing!
Lack of true leadership at senior level. Fear of holding people accountable for their mistakes, “let’s not point fingers.” No one wants to make a decision just in case it doesn’t work out.
Thanks Tim. Sometimes all people want is a decision, even if they don’t agree.
Tired of not being able to articulate the vision of why advanced leadership, team development, and project management training outside of the web based format we have at work is important to develop our team. I have access to one of the most amazing training courses put on by the Boy Scouts of America that uses the teachings of Covey, Greenleaf, & Blanchard for a bargain basement price that I can get members of my team to attend but management is hesitant to pull the trigger on outside education. It’s incredibly frustrating.
Thanks AJ… you’re right. It’s frustrating to see a path forward and feel like leadership is an obstruction.
I often complain about tax, and the incompetence of the government. Just to clear it out, I live in Denmark and we pay 40% in tax of the first 80.000$ (480.000 kr.) and 57% of all income above 80.000$. Even with “free” education, hospital and doctor, there is a huge overspend on bureaucracy, regulations and laws.
Don’t bring up taxes and government. They were on my original list!!
Oh. I didn’t see that, but I don’t complain often, so I wanted to be honest and answer. I often handle complaints and complainers, typically because there is a gab between two perceptions, honesty, or lack of great leadership (poor emotional intelligence)
Jill Lepore, Professor of American History at Harvard University, is quoted as saying “Taxes are what we pay for civilized society, for modernity, and for prosperity. The wealthy pay more because they have benefitted more”… how civilised would our societies be without taxes, and how much more would we have to complain about?
Slow, sloppy and incomplete unenthusiastic work effort from Millennials; it does not matter the task they seem just not interested
Lack of enthusiasm is a killer!
The challenge on the lack of enthusiasm extends beyond my work spear; I see it all over with this Millennial group; (church, community, extended family etc.). My Gen Z adult children (right on the lower cusp of Millennials) are enthused but a large number of their peers just seem to be wandering without purpose and hence unenthused thru life. Has the sense of putting in a good work effort regardless of work just faded away?
Management that you give a good solution to an issue who “say” they are going to move forward and don’t. I don’t care if they even take the credit I just want movement.
Complainer and drama majors don’t want a solution or help. They need to be unhappy and only want people to agree in their view. They are draining and if the problem is real (rarely is) just fix it yourself and move on. They wont thank you.
Needless drama and panic at the workplace!! Employees that can’t resolve issues or think “outside the box” to make things work!! It’s constant panic and then when you try to facilitate a solution, rather than just give it, you are deemed as difficult an unwilling to help!!
I think that ‘things to complain about’ drop into 2 categories:
1.things that were advertised to be something and which then don’t match the billing (eg broadband speed that is SLOW as opposed to the advertised FAST or a job that was described in the advert as having opportunity for international travel and you actually go no further than Bracknell)
2. things that you have built your own expectation of quality, service, performance and when the don’t match that expectation you are disappointed ( being lied to OR the weather)
For the first category it is right and proper that you should mount a clear. concise and studied complaint in order to
a. rectify the situation
b. get recompense for your inconvenience
c. try and stop other people falling victim.
You may get a satisfactory response or you may not – whatever the case you should then let it go,
For the second case you should just let it go. You were the one who set the expectation in the first place against your own personal set of values and standards. Even though you expected that your boss would always tell the truth and that the sun would shine on Tuesday – no-one promised it (and even if they did – the weather forecast – they had no way of guaranteeing their promise).
So review your expectations, put it down to experience and move on…life really is too short!!
Know it all leaders. During team meetings and conference calls is almost always the first to reply (usually with a defensive comment or a reason why something is that way) or often times interrupts the speaker before they are finished making their point. Conversation usually goes to a negative tone, or, collaboration is minimized.
In life, general unkindness from poor service to self-absorbed inconsiderate strangers, because a little smile and simple manners go a long way.
At work, there are so many but if I had to pick one overarching complaint it would be not leveraging the unique talent and passions of individuals.
I think men and women complain about the same amount.
Thought provoking questions. I don’t think one gender complains more than another. I might suggest which generation complains more? My complaint may not be popular as even some of the examples already listed fall in this category. My biggest complaint, people complaining and taking no responsibility for their own actions. We all have a choice to accept things or do something about it. Unfortunately correcting most issues require time, energy and buy in. Too many people want instant gratification. I guess being a baby boomer I’ve learned that there are very few quick fixes. So here is a question, can a complainer become a good leader? I think one of my most gratifying feelings is when you are able to turn a complainer into a leader.
I’m concerned that our drive to improve the world around us and over-regulate or control society is interfering with the process of natural selection.
People won’t have time for you if you are always angry or complaining. Stephen Hawking
I forgot to mention that these are great posts. I read them every day from Mexico City. Sincere congratulations!
Blowing out one’s candle to make another’s shine brighter. Suppression of talent to gain/keep the spotlight.
Fave: When did passive/aggressive behaviour become culturally acceptable?
The first indicator of p/a is words and action/behaviour (demonstrably) not matching up/ being in alignment.
Point that out, and you are accused of taking things out of context and/or being unfair/injust. (i.e. being a fascist/Nazi)
Call “shenanigans” (“b.s.” – trying to get me to believe something you obviously don’t), and you are “biased.”
Too much tolerance of bs encourages p/a … this complaint has to do with trending toward #19: lying, the degradation of mutual trust.
Bad Coffee :0)
Dan you set yourself up for a least one of these responses. NO ONE said anything about emotional women. In fact most said its about the same between each.
Seriously…emotional women? How about the shoe on the other foot? I work in IT, have for more than 20 years. Women who work in IT since the 80’s and 90’s are what you might call…resilient. Women who work in traditional men’s fields when that is rare tend to be more skilled than most of the men and gave up emotional back when they gave up gaucho pants. What kills us is the men that act emotional and whine like babies when someone moves their cheese or challenges their ideas. These same fellows will then nod and wink at each other when a developer who happens to be female is angry with their behavior and calls it, “emotional”. So let’s do ourselves all a great favor and discuss the behavior and not the gender stereotypically associated with it.
Why deal with issues when you can dismiss it. I agree completely.
First, people who stubbornly ignore facts or the universal laws of science and mathematics because “they don’t fit what we told the customer” or “our internal guideline doesn’t cover it”;
Second, timelines and schedules that are produced with a total indifference to what is actually physically possible.
My top complaint: Organizations failing to Consider the tremendous positive impact of Servant Leadership, compared with top down, mandating management!!!
I hate it when people just don’t care about what they are doing and therefore do it half-way, at best.
Teachers who cry that they are not supported but can’t define support, union leaders who refuse to give specific information so we can address the complaints; and a boss who has all of the answers before the questions are asked and admits she hates to listen to others.
My favorite complaints:
* Totally incompetent management – and everyone around knows it but is afraid to say it out loud
* Crazy harebrained scheme-o’-the-week — frequent lurching and grasping of bright shiny objects that are NEW (actually no) that will SOLVE all our PROBLEMS and MAKE us more EFFICIENT and we’ll finally be able to TAP into the MAGICAL untapped REVENUE that is out there, in the billions of dollars, just SITTING THERE —– oh wait it’s a NEW week? Time for a NEW harebrained scheme and more lurching/grasping at bright shiny objects. It’s NEW!
* People who only remember what THEY did, never anyone else’s ideas or accomplishments (whether intentional or unintentional)
* Managers who love holding 2-hour meetings in which they get to talk for 1 hour and 50 of those minutes and think they are “listening.”
* So-called leaders who can’t answer a simple question without involving other people’s time and energy and “data.” Look, chump — if you don’t know the ballpark answer to a simple question about our program operations, wasting the team’s time and poring through crappy “data” in flawed reports isn’t going to give you the answer.
Political Correctness in all its forms.
With a little more political correctness, I can think of three people who I might be friends with.
Sure glad I don’t need to use Political Correctness as a measure of who I am friends with.
Sometimes people complain not because their is a genuine complaint but because it is part of a negative mindset
But yet you say PC would gain you three more friends. Hum???
I am a #9. The thing I complain about is judgmental people.
My biggest frustration (complaint) is not being able to have an opinion without being labeled “wrong.” We live in a country with freedom of speech and yet if it is not the popular opinion, it is deemed wrong/not PC/not forward thinking/etc. Can we just talk about it like calm adults and share our opinions/perspectives? If ultimately we still aren’t moved one way or the other, can’t we agree to disagree?