10 Ways to Show Up as a Positive Leader When the House is on Fire
Good Afternoon Dan,
So here is my question. I would love some advice on, how the heck can I get myself to show up as a positive leader day-to-day.
(This reader’s question was preceded with an explanation of his burning-house situation.)
#1. Give yourself permission to feel like crap.
If you’re happy when the house is on fire, you’re an idiot. There’s a huge difference between staying positive and feeling like crap.
A burning house sucks. Pretending it doesn’t is stupid.
#2. Keep a Crap List.
Your brain will thank you if you just write down the issues you’re dealing with. You don’t have to commit to fixing it all. Just write it down.
#3. Remember your history.
The grit that got you here will carry you through. You’ve been through some tough times. It won’t be the end of the world if the house burns down.
#4. Lead, don’t wander.
Choose ONE leadership behavior that seems to matter most today and practice it. Tomorrow, make the choice again. Maybe it’s as simple as holding your head up and breathing
#5. Glance at the big picture.
You have to fight the fire with all your might. But once in a while, think about what’s more important than your current crisis.
#6. Keep short accounts.
Don’t let issues pile up. If you screw up, apologize and move on. But don’t pretend it didn’t happen.
#7. Find clarity in frustration.
Anger shows you what you don’t want. Think about what you want.
#8. Connect with a friend.
When the house is on fire relationships matter more. I always hate to see leaders going it alone.
#9. Feel the fear.
Fear of failure might fuel your energy.
#10. Pray.
Everything you know about leadership matters more when the house is on fire.
Best wishes,
Dan
Which of the above ideas best resonate with you when the house is on fire?
What suggestions do you have for staying positive when things are tough?
DON’T MISS THE FOLLOW UP TO THIS POST:
15 WAYS TO GRAPPLE WITH DISCOURAGEMENT AND EVENTUALLY WIN
Great Sort of cheating, but numbers 1, 5 and 10 resonate the most. The “take” I have on number 5 is to keep focused on the goal, the long view, in spite of the current circumstances. So often, we attend to the urgent, while the important is neglected (yes, credit to Stephen Covey). And my view on prayer is that I will take all the help I can get, and my belief system is such that although I get frustrated with circumstances, I understand that while I am not in control, He is. In terms of other suggestions: take a step back; take a look from 30,000 feet — get a different perspective on the circumstances..
Thanks Daryl. There is something powerful that happens in leaders when they take a look around. As you say, we attend to the urgent. That’s not all bad. The urgent needs attention.
The trouble comes when we neglect the big picture. Energy in the short-term comes from progress. Energy in the long-term comes from connecting with purpose.
#5 and #8, keep your eye on the prize, were are we going. Don’t get stuck in the weeds. and phone a friend, if just to say hi but don’t dump. A good friend will be able to tell if you need to share.
Today was a day of “how did that happen” and “someone is going to have to answer for this” kind of day and that on my Monday after being gone for 8 days. Good timing on this post.
Thanks Walt. One of my personal favorites is connect with others. It’s easy to isolate during adversity.
Welcome back Walt! Don’t go away again! 🙂
#3 and #5 for the win!
Remembering the other tough times you’ve worked through is critical. And #5…best not to make rushed poor decisions because of the current crisis – as they may ruin your big picture.
One other tip I like is to try to surround yourself with people you can “delegate enthusiasm” to.
Sometimes, you feel like crap and things aren’t going well. But if you can find that someone in your team who shows positivity and drive while you take a short rest, it can give you the headspace to come back better the next day.
Thanks Ben. Your insight made me think about leveraging the strength of others. Your team likely has an optimist on it. Encourage them AND live off their energy for a bit.
every one will have a “valley experience” at some stage, being prepared in season and out of season can help.
Thanks Gerry. Yes….the idea that leadership/life is skipping from one happy moment to the next is just silly.
thanks for sharing. I wish I could share this with my leader. anyway, a good read for myself.
Thanks Kampumggirl…. How about printing it off an slipping it under the office door when no one is looking. 🙂
Dan,
#5 there always seems to exist the “big picture” within our own paths, we forget about others who are worse off.
#7 understanding our direction lets us wander #4 which directs us to #2 to keep a list, may get through the understanding & direction.
#8 Always remember the friends, they are there for you as well as you for them! Priceless.
Thanks Tim. I still come back to connect with someone as my favorite. Perhaps because I spent a large part of my journey behind a wall. (One that I built)
I have been reviewing the post for the last 3-4 years this is by far the best post!
2-3-8 !
Thanks for sharing
Thanks Eugene! Have a great one.
I go with #7. I think most of us leaders are fixers. The quicker I can focus on what I want, the quicker I start to influence things in that direction and stay focused on the mission, not the smoke in my eyes. I liked many of the other posts and your post overall. Nicely done!
Dan,
As I had just finished reading this article, there was a knock on my door. Two employees came in with differences that they wanted me to resolve. Talk about fires!!! After 10 minutes of much table thumping, venting and red faced back and forth, the issue was resolved and they shook hands and left for their duties. I pondered at the coincidence of putting out this fire and wrote this poem on ‘Being the Difference!’
Expect the best in yourself
Expect the best in others
Work to be an influence
But prepare for all fires
Learn to be a thermostat
To influence your game
Instead of a thermometer
That changes with the same
For when you have a fire
It challenges your strengths
Its heat and refinement
Will prove your inner depth
So believe in your strengths
Lead with perseverance
For when it’s all said and done
You’ll be the difference!
I don’t know if I just love puns so much, or if it is my inner Beavis and Butthead teenage boy self, but really? #2 is crap? #2. Keep a Crap List. I actually like the idea; seems like an easy “brain hack” that will work. I’ll try it and in my head will be “he-he-he-he, Dan said #2 is ‘crap,’ snort, snicker, ha-ha! ‘Duh!’ giggle-giggle.”
As someone in the fire service, yes, leadership does matter when the house is on fire. But I think if I were to analogize further, the idea of a house fire and all the activities, worries, concerns, and tactics that go into a successful outcome there, transfer over to your blog topic today. Some parts of structures and be saved and others can’t. It’s like #2-some things can be solved, some can’t, but you need to be aware of all of them. #3 history will help you remember training and past experiences and assist in your decisions about how to deal with the current crisis/problem. #5 is key because as you have said Dan, long term perspective overcomes short term frustration. Having a 35,000 foot view of things will help in delegating and managing the larger task at hand without getting lost in minutia. Last, the final three can be taken as a package. We need to work as a team whether in the fire service or not. Fear gives birth to courage, for you cannot have one without the other. Pray every day. Call it what you will, bu those quiet contemplative moments are when we can consciously hit a reset button and refocus ourselves and seek solace. Thanks for a thought provoking post today Dan.