I Had a Boss Who Poisoned Relationships

Every word you say to yourself and others matters.

Gossiping manager:

I had a boss who poisoned relationships. She bad-mouthed support staff. My mirror neurons made it natural to agree.

Gossip ignites tension.

It wasn’t right but I agreed with her bad-mouthing because she was my boss. I didn’t have enough personal authenticity to speak my mind.

When your boss complains to you about others, you take up an offense that isn’t yours.

Pollution:

Gossip pollutes your life when you take up an offense. Think of it. You get mad at people you don’t know or might not work with.

Negativity that resides in your mind pollutes your heart.

Suppose you hear a group of married men bad-mouthing their wives. If you aren’t careful, you end up disliking people you don’t know.

Why is some gossip more damaging?

Liking matters:

When you allow someone’s words to poison your mind about a person, that person becomes less trustworthy to you. You question their integrity.

Gossip is damaging because you tend to agree with people you like and disbelieve people you don’t like.

I have a friend who has “complained” about his wife to me but it doesn’t feel harmful. I have another friend who complains about his wife and it feels like poison.

One friend doesn’t seem to like his wife. The other friend loves his wife.

Lingering stink:

People misjudge you because they heard something bad about you. Those judgments cling like skunk spray.

Misjudgments stick when gossip pollutes your mind. People get branded. It doesn’t matter how wrong those judgments are.

What makes some gossip more damaging?

How do you address negative issues without being a gossip?