How to Inspire Others to Fly
Organizations that don’t develop leaders – die. One of the great questions of leadership is, “How are you inspiring others to fly?”
Surprisingly, baby bluebirds grow from birth to fledglings in about three weeks. Before they fledge, they require constant care and feeding. Eventually they peek at the world through the small round door in their home.
Parents fly to the door with grubs and bugs. We hear the young going nuts. But at fledging time, mom and dad shift tactics.
No food:
Bluebird parents land at the door WITHOUT food at fledging time. We still hear crazy chirping but the parent pauses and flies away.
Eventually daddy bluebird perches nearby with a juicy meal dangling from his beak. While daddy coaxes the young from the white birch, mommy demonstrates the desired behavior. Over and over she flies from the birch to the house and back to where daddy dangles the bug.
Redefining help:
Bluebirds expect their young to come to them. They stop showing up with food and expect their young to come and get it.
Redefine ‘help’ when others are ALMOST ready to take flight.
Change your patterns of helping to instigate growth in others. It might be stressful but it won’t be disappointing if everyone knows why you stopped showing up with food.
Maybe you’ve been showing up in someone’s office to check-in. Now it’s time for them to show up in your office, for example.
You change first.
Help to a novice is an insult to experience.
If you don’t change the way you help, others will eventually reject you. If you treat your teen like an infant, they will eventually hate you.
Help differently not necessarily help less. But if you expect to take on new challenges, eventually you will help less.
What makes helping helpful?
Tip: Effective helping includes rising above the need to be needed.
Reminds me of the saying give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Equipping others with skills so they need less of you.
Thanks Gerry. Love the word ‘equipping’. It suggests that others have to use what you give them to better themselves and serve others. Have a great day.
This is a great analogy. It is key for successful transition that they understand why you no longer check-in, lest they think you stopped caring or supporting their success.
Thanks Susan. Yes, my experience is that leaders tend to pull back but not explain what’s happening. The other concern is they pull back too far too fast and then wonder why people don’t step up.
Love it. Great reminder to emulate the behaviors that we want growing leaders to learn. Coach them, encourage them, but give them the right amount of autonomy in a safe environment to stretch their leadership wings. It is a thrill to watch a growing leader flex their muscles and take on more and more responsibility.
Thanks Joel. You added two key ideas that help. #1..the right amount of autonomy. #2..a safe environment.
We should note that a safe environment isn’t a failure proof environment. It’s an environment where it’s safe to try and fail responsibly.
Great post and comments. This post also ties in nicely to the previous post about creating the future we want. To ensure a positive future for an organization, creative leadership must be nurtured and developed, not to maintain the status quo but to meet the challenges of the future, both known and unknown. Start developing your replacement today, for you won’t be around forever!
Thanks Jim. “Develop your replacement”…we might not like the feeling that comes with this, but if we don’t start developing our replacement there will be a hole when we leave.
Sadly, we might enjoy the fact that others miss us when we’re gone. I think it’s more leaderly if they don’t miss us when we’re gone. (I don’t mean to say that they will be glad we’re gone or that they won’t miss the relationship.)
This is a solid thought, Dan. I was with a group of young leaders yesterday talking about the difference between inspiration and motivation. Inspiration creates the environment for motivated people to fly. Thanks for the terrific illustration!
Thanks Edgar. You offer a great leadership opportunity. What can we do today to create an environment where motivated people fly? The idea of removing obstacles and of helping a little, but not too much comes to mind.
So how do you handle the situation when younger ones (in age and experience) do not really want to grow, they are comfortable in the place they are? I am seeing this all over, lack of motivation and drive. We could lay them out on the run way but they just don’t seem to want to fly. Maybe we older guys are just asking too much of the young ins?
Thanks Roger. Maybe the young ins aren’t capable yet? But, the bluebirds seem to leverage hunger. Pain is a motivator. I want to be careful in suggesting that leaders should cause pain. However, if you are creating an environment that comforts the self-indulgence perhaps a little discomfort is in order.
There are many factors to motivation. Things like safety, strengths, and personal passion comes to mind.
Dan; Unfortunately it seems the “personal passion” remains missing regardless of how much opportunity we give for them to fly. I also see this across the country in different groups that I deal with; there is passion in some but it’s fleeting and in the definite minority. But then again maybe being from the Boomers I expect too much.
If you aren’t seeing passion you are either hiring the wrong people or killing it. Boomers aren’t better, we are louder. Give them a chance to share their voice.
This is an excellent article with great comments. I would like to add that this is also very true for raising kids. This effort should start at home with our preteens and teens to help raise inspired and motivated young adults to take on the Leadership roles in organizations when they’re ready to step into the workplaces.