The 5 Enemies of Gratitude that Blow Up Your Leadership
Talented leaders rise on the wings of gratitude.
The 5 enemies of gratitude:
#1. Bob Betterthan.
Bob is an expert faultfinder. He’s ungrateful because no one quite measures up.
#2. Sam Serveme.
Sam won’t say it but he believes people exist to serve him. He may seem humble, kind, and polite but arrogance beats in his heart.
Sam eventually grabs his toys and runs home because everyone disappoints.
Tip: You always have a place when you show up to serve. (Note: We serve each other. Let people serve you, too.)
#3. Nelly Knowsmore.
Nelly knows how everyone should do their job, even though she doesn’t actually do their job.
I keep my mouth shut when my wife is cooking. For some reason I know how she should cook, even though my expertise in cooking ends with burgers on the grill. (I learned this lesson the hard way.)
Tip: Be grateful for the knowledge of others, even if you think you know more.
#4. Tammy Tellsmore.
Tammy loves to tell people what to do, but they never do quite enough.
Tammy’s ungrateful because, like Bob Betterthan, she feigns superiority.
#5. Harry Hogsthespotlightmore.
Harry believes the applause others receive is undeserved and the applause he receives is inadequate.
Praise is a limiter for those who can’t live without it.
The person who needs the spotlight only rises to the level of the praise they receive.
The first time someone on your team receives praise for something you taught them – but you remain unacknowledged – is one of the great tests of leadership.
Enabling and empowering gets to the point that others outshine you in some area. That’s when you step in the shadows.
You look pathetic when you bring up your contribution to someone else’s success.
Tip: Servant leaders cheer the progress and success of others.
Solution: Practice gratitude, even if you don’t feel grateful.
What enemies of gratitude do you notice?
Bonus material:
This four-letter Word is the Enemy of Gratitude (PT)
6 Habits that Destroy Gratitude (Ruth Oneil)
Thanks so much for your gratitude series. Such great insights. If anyone wants to watch the replay of our interview on Asking For a Friend, I’ve included that here. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving. https://letsgrowleaders.com/2020/11/25/on-being-grateful-an-asking-for-a-friend-interview-with-dan-rockwell/
Thanks for posting this link, I’ve not seen this prior..
Thanks Karin. I’m thankful for you and the opportunity to be on “Ask for a Friend.” Thanks for sharing the link.
“Kenny-commenter” sends Thanksgiving Greetings to the Rockwell’s I appreciate your daily “day-starters” they keep me sharp!
Haha… thanks Kenny! 🙂 Happy Thanksgiving to you sir.
How about: Tom Takesallthecredit–No matter what everyone else does, what part they play or the support they offer, Tom always takes the credit and he never acknowledges anyone for anything. In fact when things don’t go right Tom may turn into Tom Throwseveryoneunderthebus.
Great insights!!!! Have a great Thanksgiving!! j
Wow! Great add John. Love that one. The “bus thrower” is hilarious…but too true. Fun!
BTW… I don’t know if everyone knows about your Book, “Overcoming Fake Talk,” but it’s a keeper. http://amzn.to/1o1r0c2
Thanks Dan. Love your work. Thankful for your thoughtfulness and willingness to share with us.!
My pleasure!
This is a great and light hearted article, Dan! the nicknames are hilarious! I am grateful for your articles and share them with my team.
Thanks Lisa. I wish you well on the journey!
Thank you for the fictitious names. We would hate for someone to be incriminated by your message today. I bet you make a great hamburger, too.
LOL…thanks Montie. Truth be told, I’m in several of the fake names. 🙂
Throughout this very difficult year for everyone, I am grateful to just be alive and to celebrate Thanksgiving with my children–even on Zoom. I pray for all the families who lost loved ones who will never again see them at the Thanksgiving table. The last stage of loss is to forgive–and I offer my strength here, even through I am still working on that, to be present for the gift of giving thanks.
Thanks Victoria. I feel the heart in your comment and wish you well.
Thank you Dan for your incredible work. Your themes of gratitude and humility are truly appreciated by many. I saw this wonderful clip in my inbox this morning.
https://youtu.be/tlcILxGmVrI
“Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for.”
Zig Ziglar
Thanks Joseph. Love the Ziglar quote!
I see Frank Thanks-but a lot! Gratitude is an interesting concept, along with empathy that has gotten more spotlight in the last year than I’ve seen in the past. Being a fairly straightforward concept, I see a lot of folks try to be empathetic and more grateful, as I too agree, I can do more of it! However, faulty-gratefulness or empathy wrapped with a ‘but’ occurs too often in my world. “I really appreciate how hard the team has been working to deliver, but….” Being thankful, grateful, appreciative and empathetic are washed-away with an add-on requirement or a ‘but.’
Thanks Travis. The ‘but’ problem is real. ‘But’ is an eraser. I wish you well in your studies.