Dealing with Anger: 3 ways to Transform Negative Energy into Positive Action
Successful leaders know how to transform negative energy into positive action.
You don’t care enough if you never feel irritation or frustration.
The temptation of anger:
Emotion controls action. Angry leaders get quick results.
Anger is a seductive shortcut to influence.
Anger inspires action from those who want a job.
Authority to give promotions is the power to instill fear.
Fear makes anger powerful.
Leaders that control assignments are feared by those who seek advancement.
When people fear you, your anger motivates them.
A frustrating universe:
There’s great value in writing down goals, but the universe doesn’t care if you reach them.
If the universe conspired to help us, leadership would be irrelevant. Everyone would get what they want. Achieving dreams would be easy.
An indifferent universe is frustration for aspiration.
Negative energy transforms to positive action when you rise above a universe that doesn’t cooperate.
3 ways to transform negative energy into positive action:
Anger can be deadly, but frustration is your friend.
#1. Frustration points to aspiration.
Negative energy transforms to positive action when you ask, “What do I really want?”
In the beginning, frustration tells you what you don’t want and don’t like. Use negative energy to clarify positive aspiration to serve others.
#2. Frustration says it’s time to speak up.
Frustration builds up when you don’t speak up. But don’t blow up.
Anger obscures the vulnerability it takes to say what you truly want.
Say ‘I’ not ‘you’ when describing what you want.
#3. Frustration says it’s time to try something new.
Persistence turns to anger when you keep doing what isn’t working.
When frustration persists, ask,
- “What’s not working?”
- “What do I need to stop?”
- “What might I do differently?”
- “Who might help?”
How does negative energy produce short-term results?
How might leaders transform negative energy into positive action?
Bonus material:
Forget Positive Thinking: This Is How To Actually Change Negative Thoughts For Success (forbes.com)
5 Ways to Turn Your Anger Into an Advantage – Lawyers Mutual Insurance Company (lawyersmutualnc.com)
How does negative energy produce short-term results? It becomes the fix now just to get it done, may not be the proper fix, yet it still functions, more or less the band-aid approach.
How might leaders transform negative energy into positive action? Understanding the Anger is not the solution and solves nothing in the long run other than venting and often times makes oneself look like an “out of control fool”. If we reflect back on those knee jerk moments we often see the light was there we just missed turning it on.
Thanks Tim. Your comment speaks to me. The inclusion of ‘short-term results’ and ‘band-aid approach’ speaks volumes.
Frustration persists even more when the organisations says “It’s how we have to do it, it’s what the regulator expects, it is what it is…”
Perhaps frustration persists until people stop caring.
I wonder if an unwillingness to accept what can’t/won’t be changed is one of the toughest things we do.
Years ago, I was in a group of frustrated employees, where the leaders could have used this same messaging (not on themselves, but toward us as a group). Our frustrations were related to our passion about our work (#1) and all we heard is we have to improve and do better. We all had ideas, yet we were doing the same things and having the same conversations (#3) over and over again.
To the leader who may have tunnel vision, don’t write off frustrations as just a bunch of complaining employees. it is easier and less stress to just do what you way and collect our paychecks. The frustration comes in when we want to make a change for the better but are unable to (for whatever reasons). Left unchecked, I’d say frustration can turn into dissatisfaction, which turns into disengaged “check collecting 9-5ers” or your good people leave to get a job that they feel suits them better.
My favorite part of your article (unrelated to the above) is this:
“If the universe conspired to help us, leadership would be irrelevant. Everyone would get what they want. Achieving dreams would be easy.”
That is great point that hits me right in my confirmation bias standing up against a fairly popular notion over the past 15 years.
I’ll agree that you need to let “the universe” (people) know what you are trying to do, as people like helping others, you may get some unexpected help or benefits due to this. However to your point-The universe doesn’t care if we reach our goals or not.
Fantastic post – Yes I turned it from an inward approach to how others should apply it. To turn it back – Of course, I need to face the mirror and apply this to my own thinking and emotions.
A good reminder to do a self-check on if I want commitment or compliance.
Anger and fear can get me compliance, and do it very quickly. However, I shouldn’t expect people to be committed to my cause if I use tactics best suited for immediate and most likely short-term compliance.
Thanks Nick. Powerful comment and insights. We all need to remember that frustration means we care and frustrated employees care. We should acknowledge that a few frustrated employees care for the wrong things. But most employees care about succeeding!
It would be useful for all leaders to respect and explore the frustrations of talented employees…. instead of offering quick solutions or simply telling them to deal with it.
One the other matter…. I think you are exactly right. When we declare our goals to people, some will be excited to help. I find it very useful to talk about goals and vision. People may conspire to help us, but the universe, from my perspective, doesn’t conspire at all.
Good callout on the few frustrated employees caring for the wrong things.
Totally happens.
I may be one who easily gets suckered in to caring about some things I can’t control, but think I may be able to “influence”.
People above me pay other people to handle those things. Really, I can only make suggestions, but at some point I need to come back to what I am paid to handle. Not sure I’m fully comfortable with that, but in the end, that is part of the truth.
The second sentence in this blog is a powerful and a very true statement. You stated, “You don’t care enough if you never feel irritation or frustration.” The “I do not care” attitude can be a deadly disease to destroy a successful organization. Sometimes when frustrated or angry, it is easy to state that “I do not care” but deep down the individual does care. The concern is when some does not have a care even deep down. The dangers of that attitude can create culture issues which can overflow to other employees. In high hazard workplaces, having a “I do not care” attitude can lead to a major injury or even worse death. The individual with the “I do not care” attitude can take short cuts or not properly follow procedures thinking it does not apply to them. For example, the individual with that negative attitude may not fully lock-tag-verify an electrical unit and just half-heartily do the job. They do not verify zero energy because they know “they locked it out” but energy is still present and can cause serious injury to someone