My heart races on Monday mornings. There’s a mountain of work to do. It feels like I’m being punished for relaxing Sunday afternoon. I should have logged in and answered email but I didn’t. I should have finished that report, or jump started some of this week’s projects. But I didn’t. All of this translates into feeling rushed. Or to say it with a positive connotation, I’m “eager” to get to work.
Have you ever tried to talk with someone who was in a hurry? How did it feel? Did you feel like they listened? Did you feel like they cared? Did it feel like your message was important? Did it feel like you were important? No it didn’t.
Calmness communicates interest in others and their message. On the other hand, hurry says I’m not interested and you’re not important.
You can express calmness by:
- Standing still
- Speaking slowly
- Small hand movements rather than huge gestures
- Removing that pained look from your face
- Sitting with someone
- Writing down what the speaker is saying
- Asking a follow up question
If you don’t have time to listen, tell them, “I’m interested in what you’re saying but I have a meeting in five minutes. When can we touch base later?”
Leadership is influence:
Listening opens the door of influence. In other words, when others feel you have listened, they’re more likely to respect you and accept your decisions even if they aren’t what I like.
Leaders reach higher with calmness