You do some of your old job and some managing too. It’s a pressure cooker of tasks and responsibilities.
Stress isn’t all bad:
Low stress is boring.
Reasonable doses of stress challenge you to rise and conquer.
Stressed-out makes you stupid, moody, negative, and unproductive.
How to Move from Stupid to Smart when You’re Stressed
I use the following pattern for conversations with over-stressed leaders.
#1. Fear drives the conversation. They’re afraid they can’t succeed. Call it panic with a smile, but it feels like they’re thrashing in the weeds.
- Pop the cork on pressure. “What’s going on?” (You won’t have to invite them to talk.)
- Never minimize, explain, or solve a stressed-out person’s problems.
Address emotion before seeking solution.
#2. Reconnect with purpose.
Don’t try to solve stress until you find a reason to face stress.
- How did you happen to get into this job in the first place?
- What made this role attractive to you?
#3. Make a list of the trees in the jungle. Imagine you’re hacking a path through the jungle. What needs to be chopped down?
#4. No solutions allowed. When leaders list their pressing responsibilities, they add solutions. As soon as you hear a stressed person try to solve a problem, stop them. “Lets just make a list. No solutions.”
Get it all down. When they slow down, ask, “Anything else?”
Read the list back to them. Keep your pen handy. “Is that it?”
#5. Break it down.
- What can you put off until tomorrow? (Prioritize)
- What can someone else do? (Delegate)
- What do you have to do today? (Prioritize)
- What can you get done? (Make imperfect progress)
Tips:
- Where they feel uncertainty, ask, “Who might know?” (Bring the outside in.)
- Remind them of their talent and strengths. “You’re suited to face this because you’re really good at….”
What suggestions do you have for making progress when stressed-out?
What shouldn’t be done when someone is stressed-out?
NOTE: This entire conversation can happen in 30 minutes. This is a short-term strategy. Long-term solutions require calm heads and time.
Bonus material:
Stress Makes You Stupid (Time)
Coping with Stress at Work (APA)
