It’s not good to knock-out yourself.
Self-defeat is inevitable until you acknowledge you’re punching yourself in the face.
13 Self-Defeating Behaviors:
#1. People pleasing that motivates to stress-out over opinions and approval.
#2. Perseverance in the face of futility.
Stop rolling the same stone up the same hill. (Sisyphus)
Find a new stone or find a new hill.
#3. Defending your position instead of exploring options.
Your need to win defeats your team.
#4. Putting off important work until the last minute.
Procrastination is an excuse-maker’s back door.
#5. Perfecting before you go instead of perfecting as you go.
#6. Hanging from the knot at the end of the rope before seeking help.
If you want to go far, seek help early and often.
#7. Rejecting reasonable risk.
If you want things to be different next year, step out now.
#8. Giving feedback, but never seeking feedback.
The first function of leadership is model the way. Practice a behavior for three months before you ask others to practice it.
#9. Practicing pugilism on yourself.
Leadership is hard enough. Why not learn from mistakes instead of beating yourself down?
Obsessing about mistakes is a subtle form of arrogance. “I shouldn’t have done that.” But real people make mistakes. Wise people learn.
#10. Refusing to enjoy benefits and advantages.
#11. Avoiding elephants.
Only a two-year old believes monsters go away when you cover your eyes.
Difficult situations get worse when you avoid them.
#12. Dominating conversations.
The person who talks the most has the most power. If you want your team to feel powerful, listen to them talk.
#13. Dreaming without taking the next small step.
Any dream you can’t act on today is a self-defeating fantasy.
Tip: Sometimes the next step is learning from someone.
What self-defeating behaviors have you seen?
Which self-defeating behavior should you avoid today?
Bonus material:
7 Ways to Get Out of Your Own Way and Get things Done (Success)
10 Self-Defeating Behaviors to Avoid (FastCompany)