Mastering Grounded Confidence

Don’t lie to yourself. Grounded confidence begins with truth-telling.

Confidence Killers

  • Inaction.
  • Constant reassurance.
  • Thinking without action.
  • Avoiding discomfort.
  • Comparing yourself with others.
  • Hiding mistakes.

Grounded confidence requires courage to act and humility to learn.

Brene' Brown: Courage, humility, and grounded confidence.

Blue-Collar Confidence

“People always talk about talent. But what they don’t want to talk about is the loneliness. An empty gym running the same move over and over. No applause. No crowd.” Larry Bird

Bird is the ONLY person in NBA history to win:

  • Rookie of the Year
  • Most Valuable Player
  • Finals MVP
  • All-Star MVP
  • Coach of the Year
  • Executive of the Year

Build Grounded Confidence

#1. Do hard things

“When I stepped on the court, I wasn’t out there hoping I could win. It is not about talking yourself up. It is about knowing that you have outworked every single person in that room.”

Doing easy things makes you weak. Stretch yourself.

Action answers anxiety.

Action Item: Do one thing you’ve been putting off.

#2. Record your wins

Action Item: List three achievable goals every day. Check them off when you reach them.

Life without confidence is agony. Image of a duck walking toward fog.

#3. Prepare

Preparation softens doubt.

Action Items:

  • Rehearse conversations.
  • Study before meetings.

#4. Speak with clarity

Hesitation kills confidence.

Action Items:

  • Slow your speech.
  • Say fewer words.
  • Finish sentences.
  • Don’t vacillate.

#5. Compare yourself to yourself

Measure progress against yesterday, not others.

Action Item: Keep a journal.

#6. Find a truth-teller

False praise creates weak confidence.

Action Items:

  • Seek feedback.
  • Keep people who challenge you.

#7. Turn outward

Don’t focus on yourself. Serve others.

Action Item: Help someone succeed today.

Bonus: Shift from, “I’m terrible,” to “I’m learning.”

Challenge: Build grounded confidence in others.

Resources:

3 Tips to Build Confidence in Timid Team Members

Leading With Grounded Confidence