20 Jerks You Know
#1. Oblivious jerks: don’t see how their behavior harms others. Thinks people should grow up.
#2. Coldhearted jerks: see how they drive people crazy, but don’t care.
#3. Visionary jerks: believe vision justifies walking on people.
#4. Genius jerks: have remarkable insights that exempt them from good manners.
#5. High performing jerks: place results over relationships.
#6. Insecure jerks: put others down to feel better about themselves. Criticism shields inadequacy.
#7. Stressed out jerks: act decently on good days. Pressure is an excuse for cruelty.
#8. Passive-aggressive jerks: smile in meetings and backstab in hallways. They avoid direct conflict and create indirect misery.
#9. Victim jerks: believe their happiness is your responsibility.
#10. Micromanaging jerks: trust no one. They suffocate initiative while convincing themselves they’re helping.
#11. Entitled jerks: believe the rules apply to everyone else. Special treatment feels deserved.
#12. Bully jerks: use intimidation, anger, or fear to get their way.
#13. Know-it-all jerks: are more interested in being right than learning. Conversations are competitions.
#14. Credit-snatching jerks: do 10% of the work but take 100% of the spotlight. They show up for the win, but not the sweat.
#15. Miserly jerks: hoard information. They believe keeping others in the dark elevates their own status.
#16. Chameleon jerks: kiss up and kick down. They are angels to leadership, but a nightmare to peers and subordinates.
#17. Ghosting jerks: enthusiastic during brainstorming. But leave execution and clean up the others.
#18. Boundary-busting jerks: expect 24/7 availability because their lack of planning is “your emergency.”
#19. Cynical jerks: kill momentum. They believe relentless negativity is “realism.”
#20. Chaos-making jerks: manufacture emergencies to cover their lack of performance.
Which jerk is your “favorite?”
What kind of jerk can you add to this list?
3 Ways to Protect Good Managers from Becoming Jerk-holes – Leadership Freak
6 types of bad bosses and how to deal with them – Fast Company
Follow Leadership Freak. I plan to explain how to deal with jerks over the next few posts.
People who over complicate everything.
Thanks Paul.
Thanks for a great reflection opportunity! I read these and thought about what “jerk” I have been as a leader, as a team member, as a friend, etc.and when… and then I thought about the opposite I want to be… so, I hope you don’t mind that I added champions to your jerks 😉
#1. Oblivious jerks: don’t see how their behavior harms others. Thinks people should grow up.
Awareness Champion: reads people; recognizes harm in situations, and is able to name it gently without pointing fingers.
#2. Coldhearted jerks: see how they drive people crazy, but don’t care.
Warmhearted Champion: keen awareness of how their, and others’, behavior impacts people, and cares deeply.
#3. Visionary jerks: believe vision justifies walking on people.
Visionary Champion: able to “look beyond,” and keep the desired outcomes in the spotlight in an affirming, non-judgmental way.
#4. Genius jerks: have remarkable insights that exempt them from good manners.
Genius Champion: recognizes and elevates the ideas and deep thinking “in the room.”
#5. High performing jerks: place results over relationships.
Relationship Champion: understands that people matter, connections matter, how we treat others matters, AND is willing to pause on results in order to slow the pace and protect relationships.
#6. Insecure jerks: put others down to feel better about themselves. Criticism shields inadequacy.
Confidence Champion: elevates all voices in the room; understands that humility builds trust.
#7. Stressed out jerks: act decently on good days. Pressure is an excuse for cruelty.
Calm Champion: always reliable for centering calm and kindness, even on the tough days.
#8. Passive-aggressive jerks: smile in meetings and backstab in hallways. They avoid direct conflict and create indirect misery.
Consistency Champion: depend upon them to show up with the same upstanding character, no matter the circumstances.
#9. Victim jerks: believe their happiness is your responsibility.
Agency Champion: believes in the ability of each individual to make their choices and own their outcomes.
#10. Micromanaging jerks: trust no one. They suffocate initiative while convincing themselves they’re helping.
Delegation Champion: believes in others and their ability to add to the shared project or shared meaning.
#11. Entitled jerks: believe the rules apply to everyone else. Special treatment feels deserved.
(Humble) Servant Champion: believes there are greater benefits gained by serving others.
#12. Bully jerks: use intimidation, anger, or fear to get their way.
Support Champion: uses listening, trust, kindness, and empowerment to ensure all voices are heard and understood.
#13. Know-it-all jerks: are more interested in being right than learning. Conversations are competitions.
Listening Champion: believes everyone has something to be heard and considered; listens intently to understand deeply.
#14. Credit-snatching jerks: do 10% of the work but take 100% of the spotlight. They show up for the win, but not the sweat.
Spotlight Champion: ensures that every contributor, no matter the size of the contribution, is recognized and celebrated!
#15. Miserly jerks: hoard information. They believe keeping others in the dark elevates their own status.
Transparency Champion: freely shares information for the benefit of all.
#16. Chameleon jerks: kiss up and kick down. They are angels to leadership, but a nightmare to peers and subordinates.
Builder Champions: recognize the importance of elevating others to leadership while providing clear and consistent information and behaviors to their peers and subordinates.
#17. Ghosting jerks: enthusiastic during brainstorming. But leave execution and clean up the others.
Reliability Champion: ensures brainstorming enthusiasm is turned into action planning with assigned action steps that are progress monitored all along the way.
#18. Boundary-busting jerks: expect 24/7 availability because their lack of planning is “your emergency.”
Boundary Champion: sets and shares clear expectations and holds individuals accountable along the way.
#19. Cynical jerks: kill momentum. They believe relentless negativity is “realism.”
Possibilities Champion: sees failure and negativity as opportunities to reframe as learning.
#20. Chaos-making jerks: manufacture emergencies to cover their lack of performance.
Order Champion: demonstrates the ability to effectively use the “power of the pause” to bring calm to chaos.
Which jerk is your “favorite?”
Which Champion is your “favorite?”
Wow Patricia!! Your mind when where I went. I’ve been mulling over how to turn this in a positive direction. I was thinking about some post that focus on how to deal with jerks. Thanks for sharing your insights!
My pleasure 🙂 Twas actually an enjoyable challenge 🙂
The “Helpful” Saboteur jerk:** presents as an ally by relentlessly pointing out why things won’t work or what’s wrong. They disguise their negativity as “saving you from failure.”
They believe they are providing essential risk management, protecting the team, and offering constructive feedback.
The Reality:They use a mask of helpfulness to kill enthusiasm, halt progress, and mask their own risk-aversion or laziness. By pointing out flaws without ever contributing to solutions, they slow momentum to a crawl while maintaining plausible deniability: *”Hey, I was just trying to help!”*
Thanks Joe. It’s surprising to think that “helpful” people can be unhelpful. Now that I think about it, people who are eager to help can be irritating.
Thank you Dan, Patricia and Joe! I appreciate the naming of the jerk behaviors and the counterbalance of the champions. Naming the actions and behaviors help identify it happening and can change my frustration into more tangible actions to call it out or address it. There are lots of jerks to watch out for out there!
Thanks, Gretchen. And sadly, sometimes I are one.
Another question to ask is: Which jerk do you sometimes become?
Let’s be real, we’ve all had moments where we became the jerk. Did we learn from it? Did we realize it?
Thanks SB. It’s quite a challenge to see my own jerkiness. 🙂 I guess that contributes to the problem of jerkholery.