The Darkness of Dreams
Dreams are obsessions. There’s nothing casual about them.
The darkness of dreams is:
- Misunderstanding who you are. Those who strive to be like others will feel disillusioned in their future. Authenticity builds the dream.
- Beating yourself up because you should have done better. The darkness of dreams is self-accusation.
- Holding others responsible for a distasteful present.
- Discontent with imperfect progress.
- Striving for self-sufficiency.
- Neglecting people.
- Assuming you will be different in the future.
- Assuming you will get there in giant leaps. Buckle in for the long haul.
- Waiting for “perfect” opportunities.
- Defining the dream by what you receive, rather than what you give.
- Believing the future is changed by doing something tomorrow.
- Expecting the path to be straight. Dreams change as you change. The darkness of dreams is thinking what you want today is what you’ll want tomorrow.
- Listening to voices who don’t share your values.
- Repeating behaviors that produced an unsatisfactory present.
- Focusing on what you don’t want, without clarifying what you want.
- Protecting the past at the expense of the future.
Dreams that don’t impact behaviors are illusion.
7 simple tips for dreamers:
- Dreams find you. You don’t find them.
- Dreams form as you go. Dreams formed by those who haven’t done anything are silly fantasies.
- Distill your dream into daily behaviors that you enjoy. Being different – in this moment – is the stuff of dreams.
- When it comes to dreams, the path forward is always imperfect.
- Appreciate how far you’ve come even though you have so far to go.
- Small successes embolden you to imagine what might be. Dream small at first. Let big dreams emerge.
- Change your future by changing today. Your dream is too big, if you can’t, in small ways, step toward it today.
Bonus: If you aren’t sure of your dream, help someone with theirs.
Which item(s) on the “darkness” list seems most devastating to dreams?
What “tips for dreamers” might you offer?
I thought dreams were “wishes your heart makes when you’re fast asleep”! ; )
Seriously, though … Dreams are quite telling, if we listen.
To answer your question, I would pick #12 on the list as the most devastating to dreams – the expectation of the path to reaching the dreams as a straight path. Staying focused on the goal will help to make the path clear but it might not, necessarily, be without a couple bends and turns before we reach the destination!
Thanks Dianna. You got me thinking about the upside and downside of expectation. Disappointment of our expectation takes the wind out of our sales.
#16 sometimes I hold on to the past (even bad event) out of respect to how I got to where I am. It is good to never forgot your mistakes so as to not have to learn them over but a person should also know how to move on. To be honest I have not done well with the move on part. I need to learn how to move on when you are still working with the same people that where responsible for the last failure.
Walt, The move on part is never easy. Moving on does not involve forgetting the mistake, it means looking at the mistake, learning your lessons from it, setting in motion what you can to ensure that you don’t make the same mistake again, and them moving on. For me, the best way to move on with the same team, is to not assign blame but to accept my part in that failure whether it’s direct (I caused it) or indirect (I was a part of the failure), and then asking myself what I can do to ensure that the others don’t fail next time.
I agree, moving on without spending time blaming others for their part of the last failure is more productive. I will need to reevaluate the trust I placed in those individuals who failed. It will be up to me to determine what new limits I will place on those individual. Was their failure my failure, caused by me placing unreasonable expectations on them beyond their skill level?
“Dreams can inspire you, but goals can change your life.” Thanks, Dan, for another great year of leadership tips, advice and inspiration. Happy New Year!
To dreamers, I’d say dreams are the great equalizer among the greatly gifted and the highly motivated. I’d especially say this to young students. If we can dream it, we can do it. Moreover, dreamers are realists, as most successful people are big dreamers in reality. Just think of all the entrepreneurs in the world.
In fact, Stanford University’s Business School has a plaque outside its entrance that reads: “Dedicated to the things that haven’t happened yet, and to the people who dream them up.” And inside hanging on the walls are large posters that conjure up dreams: “Unheard-of means it’s only undreamed yet; The impossible is often the untried; Impossible means it’s just not yet done; All things are possible until they are proved impossible–-and even the impossible is often only temporary.”
But are dreams real, and can they be proven scientifically to be true?
Well one medical school Chancellor explained dreams like this: Scientists believe in a “hypothesis,” and dreamers believe in a “vision.” Both scientist and dreamer must BELIEVE something to be true BEFORE “knowing it is true.” Ironically, while science can discover by accident, a dream cannot be revealed by accident. Dreamers do not prove what is impossible; they affirm what is possible.
A dream is a clear, specific, detailed vision of a strong desire that comes from deep in our subconscious thought. It has a “wonder-full” effect on our thinking and our
motivation to drive our confidence and our ability to achieve the outcome for a perceived value to us. Our dream creates our desire to make a strong commitment to it—that is, for us to decide that we’ll do whatever it takes to make our dream become reality.
About life, living, being, and doing–ask those who live lives of quiet desperation and they’ll say: When they ceased dreaming, they ceased to live. Yet ask successful dreamers and they’ll say: Sometimes our dreams are so real…we dream that we’re dreaming.
Dear Dan wishing you a very happy new year. On behalf of this great nation we all Indians wishing you successful n prosperous 2016. Keep growing.
Change your future by changing today.
I love this sentence. For any kind of dream or change in behaviour needs realisation. Very precisely firm belief of yours is most required elements.
If realisation is there , definitely wisdom will play a greater role.
Dan who can dare to dream , who has liberty of thoughts with realisation otherwise people keep dreaming and remain in dream only because there is no actualisation with realisation.
Your one more sentence like small wins of today are better then the next week.
If you have a dream , be ready to make more mistakes and learn from these mistakes will help you in getting wisdom.
ordinary people CAN see ordinary dreams but extraordinary people can see ordinary things in special way which never let them allow or permit to go for a sleep, this is power of dream and realisation.
Great minds are result of great imagination and imagination is more powerful then knowledge.
World is termed as DREAM.
I TERMED IT AS REALISATION WITH OPEN EYES MAY CALLED DREAM OR IMAGINATION.
I would like to hear opinions how Dreams (positive or negative) are in comparison to Passion…
If I had to answer this question – I would say that Dreams are goals and Passion is the fervor in which you chase toward those goals.