How to Nudge Selfish People Toward Service
Service is repulsive to self-serving jerks, but self-service limits leaders.
The more you serve yourself, the more you expect others to serve you.
To servant leaders, serving is opportunity.
4 facets of service:
#1. Serving is stepping outside yourself. To the selfish, service is something received. You can’t serve others and be filled with yourself.
Self-service elevates self-consciousness. The self-conscious make themselves the center.
Serving is placing others at the center.
#2. Serving is seeking another’s highest good. The most profound responsibility of leadership is seeking the highest good of customers, stakeholders, organizations, and communities.
Seeking the highest good of others is both motivation and expression of servant leadership.
#3. Serving is freedom. The difference between enslaving obligation and liberating opportunity is dedication to service. You don’t “have to” serve. You “get to” serve.
Life apart from service collapses inward.
#4. Serving is noble. The greatest are those who serve the most. The more you serve, the more valuable you become.
Serving expands life.
Nudging people toward service moves them toward nobility.
How to nudge selfish people toward service:
#1. Get self-centered people talking about people who served them.
- Who, from your past, made your life better?
- Who is making your life better today?
- What good things do you remember about people who made your life better?
- What were the people who made your life better like?
#2. Nudge people toward service by inviting them to emulate those who served them.
- How might you do for others today, what others did for you?
- How are you like the people who served you?
- How might you reflect today, the qualities of someone who served you?
- What would the person who served you do in this situation?
#3. Follow through.
- I’d love to hear what you’re learning about yourself.
- When can we get together to talk again.
How might servant leaders nudge others toward service?
Challenging others has worked for me, getting individuals to step out of their comfort zone is the tough part. Part of the solution is Lead by example, the other part is to encourage them that they can do what they put their mind too.
Sometimes you have to guide them on the new journey with success stories that others have accomplished which can ease the new changes they are about to encounter.
Thanks Tim. Challenge coupled with example is a powerful force. Challenge without being an example is laughable. 🙂
There is some good research that indicates success stories help us succeed. Thanks for your insights.
Absolutely we are here today, because we encountered challenges and weathered the storms! Happy 4th of July! Cheers
Great blog. Often times, individuals feel obligated, but do not feel they need to earn or do anything to fill that obligation. I like your tips about encouraging people to be less selfish, rather than disciplining the behavior. This would make the individual feel that they had control of changing the behavior. Thank you!
Thanks Tammy. Sometimes we work on symptoms rather than causes. One seems short-term; the other long. Have a great weekend.
I agree Dan, so many of us work on are very quick to react on the symptoms because it gives us the most immediate short-term satisfaction. Although, if we looked at best for the long-term, less “self” and more for the good of everyone would be the answer.
Thanks for the reply and Happy 4th,
Dan, I very much believe in servant leadership. What I find interesting is that leaders seem to be able to do this within their own silo’s, but struggle when they are asked to serve across the silos of an organization. Any insights on how to spur cross silo servant behavior? More leader to leader serving? Patrick