The Most Powerful Words You Hear
People may notice your strengths, but until your inner voice agrees, you reject affirmations. Your inner voice is more powerful than external voices.
Words aren’t magic, but they are rudders. Words set the direction of your attitudes, actions, relationships, and leadership.
It doesn’t take a genius to know negative self-talk is concrete on your feet.
I have a loud inner critic. It wouldn’t surprise me if you did too. You might be surprised at how frequently you beat yourself down. But what if you have weaknesses?
It’s responsible self-talk to own mistakes and acknowledge weaknesses. Responsibility isn’t negativity. But self-condemnation and negative rumination make you weak and hold you back.
During a conversation, Brian Tracy said, “Never say anything about yourself that you do not sincerely want to be true.” I immediately thought of negative statements I’ve heard people repeatedly say to defeat or excuse themselves. (And I’ve said too.)
During our conversation, Brian also said, “Talk to yourself about the way you want to be, not the way you are.” Negative self-rumination doesn’t inspire.
Encourage yourself the way you encourage colleagues or friends.
Brian Tracy in his own words:
You might tell yourself, “I WILL stop procrastinating.” But saying, “I will,” assumes resistance.
The person who says, “I will address that awkward issue,” doesn’t want to address it. However, inquisitive self-talk may work better.
It’s motivational to ask, “Will I?”
Research shows that asking, “Will I?” is more motivational than saying, “I will.” Perhaps the reason goes to your inner conversation.
The question, “Will I stop procrastinating?” calls for an answer. If you answer, “Yes,” your brain immediately starts to figure out how to make it happen.
Words without actions are gobbledygook. But all useful action begins with words.
What self-talk best reflects who you aspire to become as a leader?
How might you leverage the power of self-talk?
“Eat that Frog for Students,” by Brian Tracy
“Eat that Frog,” by Brian Tracy
The Stories We Tell Ourselves | Leadership Freak
Great post! Love Brian Tracy’s viewpoints on raising their children. Life is all about us believing in ourselves from the beginning, along the way you either blossom or we wilt. We “turn our cant’s into cans”, our “should into could” and “we will overcome”. The positivity in ourselves sometimes needs a little nudge “You are unstoppable”! Bravo, good stuff.
Thanks Tim. I talked over my conversation with Brian with my wife. We both agree that we were to critical of our children. At least we have time to remedy that situation. And we have time to focus on our beliefs about others. (This doesn’t mean we ignore problems or concerns. It means we approach issues from a positive/strengths point of view.
Me too! And failed even more significantly in affirming authentically. My girls could have heard more empathy in both my words and voice. I love how the awareness of these shortcomings opens doors to show up differently now!
Dan, I hear you, we learned what we saw in our parents and passed it on, perhaps in a more critical sense as you refer to, or as life goes on we mellow a bit. Our children we always want to have better than us so we tend to be a bit tougher sometimes with critiquing intended for their betterment.
good stuff Dan! I too have struggled with this in big ways to the point of believing the negative self talk…its way more than just being positive….we really have to counter the lies (negativity with truth (positivity) – thanks for the post!!
Thanks Mike. It seem important to rise about a frivolous view of positive thinking. It’s one thing to repeat positive sayings. It’s another thing to reflect attitudes and actions that take us where we want to go… and then to execute on those attitudes and potential actions.
It’s not useful to try to NOT think negative thoughts unless, as you say, you have a positive replacement.
For a long time, I felt guilty because I was taught, “You can do whatever you put your mind to.” Which means if I’m unable to do something, it’s because I’m not trying hard enough. This became debilitating for a time.
In areas where motivation is the key factor, I would agree that cultivating the “Unstoppable” mindset pays off. Make that next sales call. Try playing that riff or making that shot again. Don’t get the second helping. Do the workout anyway. Don’t quit.
I don’t want my airplane’s pilot thinking she is unstoppable, except when it comes to growth in knowledge and skill about all the factors involved. “A good pilot is always learning.”
A lot of dysfunction in companies comes when the sales mindset meets the engineering mindset and there’s no mutual respect for these different realities.