3 Ways to Lead a Know-It-All
You don’t wonder what a know-it-all thinks even though a little mystery would be nice.
Know-it-alls close their minds and open their mouths.
A know-it-all:
- Knows how to belittle you.
- Defends their opinion with emotion, not research.
- Increases volume when confronted.
- Expects compliance.
- Rejects other perspectives without consideration.
- Irritates and drains competent team members.
- Coerces timid people.
3 ways to lead a know-it-all:
#1. Ask questions:
- How did you come to that conclusion?
- What makes you say that?
- How has that worked in the past?
- What could go wrong if we do that?
- What are other ways to look at this?
- What resistance will come up if we go with your suggestion?
- How will this help the people we are serving? (In the short-term. In the long-term.)
- Ask, “And what else would you suggest?”
- Say, “If you were the customer, what questions would you be asking?”
- How does your suggestion fulfill our mission? (Know-it-alls tend to think in short-term solutions.)
#2. Determine if it matters to you:
If it doesn’t matter to you, let them talk. Excuse yourself or avoid them.
#3. Lead the conversation:
After someone offers input, ask a closed-minded person to summarize their position.
Lower their brilliant idea to a good suggestion. “Thanks for your suggestion. What other ideas do you have?”
Set expectations. “I’m gathering several suggestions before making a decision. I’ll keep your suggestion in mind.”
Cut them off before they speak. Suppose Bob is a blabbering windbag. Begin team conversations with a person’s name. “Mary, what suggestions do you have?”
Don’t let windbags believe their suggestions are decisions.
Tips:
- Some intellectual gasbags respect confidence. “Thanks for your suggestion. That’s not going to happen. I’m open to other ideas.”
- Don’t allow ego to control response. Trying to put a fathead in their place is self-defeating.
What suggestions do you have for leading know-it-alls?
A note to readers:
This post is the continuation of “5 people who drive leaders nuts.”
- Know-it-all owls.
- Get-it-done squirrels.
- Cautious possums.
- Quiet sheep.
- Social butterflies.
10 Marks of Learn-it-all Leaders
How to Deal with a Know-It-All at Work
Dan,
I particularly like your suggestions listed under–Lead the Conversation.
Thanks.
Thank you, Paul. Much appreciated.
Hey Dan: Spot-on depiction of the Know-it-Alls. The lack of ability to see any other way or opinion is often startling….and very draining as you try to maintain a professional and respectful dialogue. The Know-it-Alls also often resort to personal attacks such as: “You must not care…how can you let this…”, etc., often because they simply cannot see the bigger picture. When that happens, we respond with: “The conversation just turned personal and we’ll end it and reconvene at a later time.” Doesn’t make them happier, but it stops the “know-it-all” abuse.
Thanks Mary. It seems you’ve had experience in this arena. Drawing clear and firm lines seems important. My experience with know-it-alls is they respect strength even if it causes grumbling.
Dealing with them is situation dependent. At times that I was a guest, I would deflect as much as possible, with responses like “What do you suggest?” or “How can we make this better for you?” If they have genuine responses, so much the better, but it they are just mouthy, it puts them on the spot and they tend to quiet down. For my own units, I made it clear who was in charge through a strong personality, and attempted sharpshooters get called out with a request for a better idea that they normally don’t have. In some cases, I would put that person in charge of the solution, which they didn’t want, but they now have a responsibility, and it will hopefully teach them something.
Thanks Tim. One way to lead a know-it-all is give them opportunity to see they don’t know. In my own experience, I repeated learn I don’t know as much as I think.