Gullibility is Deadly: Practice Responsible Trust
Trust propels leaders forward.
People who see the worst in others don’t thrive in life or work. “Cynicism, if it were a pill, would really be poison.” Jamil Zaki (WSJ)
Distrust corrodes relationships, stirs conflict, slows communication, erodes team cohesion, fosters fear of failure, and drains vitality.
Responsible Trust:
Leaders thrive when they build allies instead of enemies. Share information. Practice responsible transparency. Help others. Leaders who hinder others don’t get ahead.
Gullibility is deadly.
Some leaders complain, “I feel like we’ve been having the same conversation for months. Leaders realize the futility of their actions when I ask, “What are you getting done by having the same conversation over and over?”
After the second conversation proves ineffective, say, “This is the third time we’re talking about the same thing. What you’re doing isn’t working. What can you do differently?”
Confront evasiveness. When you ask about doing differently people might talk about others. Sometimes they blame circumstances or complain about supervisors. Listen and ask the same question again. “I hear what you’re saying about others. My question is what can you do differently?”
Don’t trust what people say. Trust what they do.
- Promises aren’t performance. Action provides assurance.
- Sincerity isn’t reliability. Consistency demonstrates reliability.
- Plans aren’t results. Outcomes validate plans.
- More of the same isn’t growth. What will you do differently?
- Complaints aren’t commitments. Say, “I’m committed to…. What are you committed to?”
Offer support and expect people to do their jobs. Don’t do people’s jobs for them.
Practice mutual accountability. You are responsible to others just as deeply as your team is responsible to you. One way accountability demotivates.
How can leaders extend trust without being gullible?
Something to consider: 7 Faces of Distrust
Excellent post!
Thank you, David.
It’s less a question of gullibility and more a question of willingness to have the hard conversation. It is so much easier to have the same conversation over and over again. Just like a small child likes to watch the same movie over and over (and over and over and over) again: there is comfort in consistency. With the added bonus of being able to say that you spoke with the employee.
Thanks, Jennifer. Great insight. Negative patterns can signal compassion gone wrong. The belief that compassion is avoidance is painful. I find leaders eventually face the beast, but fear or confusion about compassion make them wait too long. Glad you dropped in today.