Relationship Resolutions for Leaders
Poor relationship skills limit leaders. Human ties strengthen us to face challenges. Confidence requires connection.
Detached leaders have friction-filled teams.
5 Signs of Lousy Relationship Skills
- Your team gathers in small groups to have a meeting after the meeting.
- Conversations go silent when you enter the room.
- You never hear “no” or receive pushback on your ideas.
- Documenting work is career protection.
- You know nothing about team members’ goals, motivations, or life outside work.
Efficiency without humanity weakens performance.
Skillful leaders know the messiness of connecting is worth it.
Relationship Resolutions for Leaders
1. Give full attention.
Attention is relational currency. People feel devalued by distracted attention.
All you have to do is quiet your spirit and notice people.
Attention is the result of elimination and focus. Turn from pressing issues. Turn to people.
2. Assume positive intent.
Assumptions waste connection time.
Lower defensiveness, eliminate gossip, and reject misinterpretation.
When you aren’t sure, don’t assume. Ask.
3. Cool hot conversations.
Speed and heat escalate conflict. Slowness restores safety.
- Breathe
- Check understanding
- Withhold judgment
- Adopt a welcoming attitude
- Practice curiosity
4. Invite constructive dissent.
Early disagreement builds trust. Late disagreement creates resistance.
Gratitude for honesty invites more honesty.
Relationship Builders
- Name effort, not just outcomes
- Give credit quickly
- End conversations with encouragement
- Keep confidences without exception
- Ask, “What are you learning?” regularly
Look at your calendar. Is it filled with ‘what’ and ‘when’? Resolve that your calendar will reflect relationship building.
Efficiency is a tool. Humanity is the fuel.
Productivity takes the shortest path. Humanity energizes the will to walk it.
What will you do to build and strengthen relationships this week?
A Simple Approach to Relationship Building
Relationship Skills at Work: 4 Relationship Skills You Need | CCL
Happy new year friend!
And to you, my friend!
What will you do to build and strengthen relationships this week?
1. Increase my curiosity. Ask more questions to get to the the person better.
2. Notice and compliment positive behaviors.
Let’s make 2026 the best year ever!
Wonderful application. Thanks Paul. And Happy New Year to you!
curious about calendars filled with “what” and “when”. What does that look like? And what is the alternative “who’ and “why”?
Great question, Edgar. A few thoughts.
Efficiency answers: “What gets done?”
Humanity answers: “Who gets stronger?”
Transactional meetings are always part of the job.
A what/when calendar is task-centric and transaction-driven. It looks like:
Budget review 10:00
Marketing update 10:30
Pipeline meeting 11:00
Project X status 1:00
Weekly ops 3:00
A who/why calendar is people-centric and purpose-driven. It looks like:
1-on-1 with Maria: growth + workload
Check-in with Carl-new role stress
Lunch with Priya-career goals
Debrief with team-what we learned
Coffee with Alex-morale and motivation
It answers: Who is this for? Why does this matter to them? What do they need right now?
The big difference is what/when is task driven. A who/why moves to a people-centric approach.
I’m glad you were curious about this. Thanks