5 Truths About Trust
Trust isn’t agreement. It’s confidence that…
- Weaknesses won’t be used as a weapon.
- Leaders serves something bigger than themselves.
- Words and actions walk hand in hand.
Symptoms of Distrust
- Excessive CC’ing on emails.
- Constant need for signoffs.
- Repeated clarification requests.
- Meetings after the meeting.
- Bad news hides under platitudes.
- Polished, self-serving updates.
5 Truths
#1. Show Up
Trust begins when people feel seen.
- Stop waiting for people to come to you. Go to them.
- Listen more than you speak.
- Respond openly when people speak plainly.
#2. Be Consistent
You don’t need to be brilliant. You need to be dependable.
Consistency beats charisma.
Reliability beats inspiration.
#3. Drop the Script
Authenticity isn’t performance. It’s unpolished honesty.
- Say what’s real.
- Admit what you don’t know.
- Tell the truth before someone asks.
Transparency turns suspicion into confidence.
#4. Share Control
Control kills trust.
- Invite others into decisions.
- Ask for input and use it.
- Give people ownership, not instructions.
“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” Attributed to Hemingway
#5. Address Elephants
Unspoken issues destroy confidence.
- If there’s history… name it.
- If there’s tension… face it.
- If trust is broken… repair it.
Ignoring distrust doesn’t prevent dysfunction.
Final Thoughts
Trust is built in:
- Quiet conversations.
- Kept promises.
- Shared ownership.
- Mutual accountability.
“Trust men and they will be true to you; treat them greatly and they will show themselves great…” Ralph Waldo Emerson
What trust-building action can you take today?
Most Employees Don’t Trust Their Leaders. Here’s What to Do About It. HBR
If only…
This post dovetails nicely with yesterday’s. That opening sentence of a difficult conversation is framed by the relationship that exists. If trust is high, there’s less temptation to beat around the bush, rather people can be more direct because they know each other’s heart. But where trust is lacking….that’s a whole different ball game. We want to cover ourselves, hedge our bets, are worried about how we’re being received, etc.
So let’s move toward increasing trust. More transparency, honesty, confessing past slights or disappointments or failures. I’ve found that a genuine apology goes a long way to restoring and building trust.
Not the best quote from Emerson. Archaic, gender specific. I appreciate that it comes from a time when “man” was considered neutral, but it also comes from a time where women were fighting for being recognized as legitimate human beings (vote, get educated, own property, have bank accounts), so there was no “neutral”. Also, the “trust me” is often a precursor for abuse including gaslighting. Now, what is the name of the most powerful national white male leader who thinks he has all the answers and insists the world treats him “greatly”…? So while I appreciate what the post is trying to say, it almost landed in the insta-bin in my email. My frustration with the thoughtlessness got the better of me, and I clicked it only to leave this comment.
Too often we see it in movies and TV shows, in particular dramas where guys often mean what they say, and not say what they mean. Especially in workplaces, that could be a killer for any employee. If however you are dealing with email, that’s a whole different game.