Slapped at the Hotel Front Desk
The elusiveness of humility slapped me in the face while I stood at the hotel’s front desk this morning.
I left my key in the room. I’ve done it so often that I’m no longer embarrassed to pick up a new key at the front desk. “Hi, I’m Dan Rockwell. I left my key in the room.”
He smiled and asked, “What room, sir?”I told him and held up my ID. He nodded and reached for a blank key. Then, to my disappointment, he just stood there.
I think I’m patient, but I felt my body language shifting toward, “Hey guy. Get me a freakin’ key. What’s the hold up?”
It had been a three or four seconds and my patience was getting short! At that moment I looked down.
On the counter was the book I’m rereading, “Humilitas!” I was reminded – like never before – that arrogance is impatient. Looking up, I discovered the reason for the delay.
The key making machine was in use. He had a blank key in his hand. He was patiently waiting to serve the knucklehead who left his key in the room.
Arrogance is easily annoyed.
Practicing humility requires reminders.
Reminders:
Arrogance lurks unnoticed in the shadows. You need persistent reminders to keep humility top-of-mind. A book on the front desk reminded me.
- Submit to a humility partner. Discuss what humility and arrogance look like. Establish a signal. Maybe a loud throat clearing when they see subtle expressions of arrogance.
- Carry a book around with the word ‘humility’ in the title. You don’t even have to read it. Just look at the title.
- Put a sticky note on your computer monitor. “Don’t be an arrogant ass!”
What types of reminders might help you practice humility?
I love this! So many times have become impatient and then had to go back and apologize for my impatience. I don’t mind apologizing what I do mind is my impatience in the first place! We are all a work in progress and this story is such a good reminder to stop and check ourselves. Thanks for your posts Dan I always get some type of tidbit out of each of them.
Thanks Nancy. You’re right. I am awesome!! 😉
An apology is a powerful expression of humility. I better apologize for the above sentence. 🙂 Cheers
Remember that someone may be ahead of us!
Now if the servant is not doing their job that tends to get under ones skin.
“Patience” is a virtue, learn to practi e what we preach.
Thanks Tim. BUT it’s all about me! 😉
BTW, you’re so right. If you’re paying for a service and someone is intentionally delinquent, humbly bring it to their attention. Cheers
I am putting the sticky note on my computer, bathroom mirror, screen saver on my phone, etc.! I catch myself sometimes being arrogant and sometimes others catch me. This is a hard lesson to learn.
Perfect!! 🙂 … Your sticky note comment cracked me up. Actually, I’ve decided to buy a box of humility bracelets to give to all the people who need them. 😉
I call moments like that a heavenly head slap. I have the ability to create situations on an regular basis to remind myself of these issues. Just by its name servant leadership requires humility and there is no room for arrogance on the part of that leader. I have found as I help move employees forward that somehow I find my own career and the respect of other moving forward at the same time. Strange how that works and when you are focused on helping others move forward as compared to crawling over them, life just seams to work out better.
Thanks Walt. I think I still have a bump on my head!! You remind me of a leader who said that the more gratitude he expressed the more he received. Funny how that works!
Hi Dan. I am struggling with how this is arrogance. I think this is more entitlement. It says “it is okay to lose my key and expect a new one.” If the keys were literal keys, it would be less likely to happen. : )
Thanks Donna. Yes…we need literal keys and key chains at hotels. I knew it was there fault. 😉
I suppose it might be entitlement…I wonder if arrogance and entitlement are connected… 🙂 Cheers
Being kind and patient is never too much. Entitlement, arrogance, you name it. Those are very far from humility anyway.
Yes, you might be right. I admire your ability to reflect and learn.
Reminds me of a great, challenging Bible verse: Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it (Hebrews 13:2). The world is full of incredibly interesting (and sometimes hurting people) and when we move to quickly we miss opportunities to learn from others, be touched and touch others — and our days are less meaningful. The only way for me to enjoy life when feeling pressed is to ensure I take the time to look in people’s eyes when we speak, to listen to their responses and sometimes the story that comes with it.
Thanks Barbara. One thing is sure, if I thought the clerk behind the counter was an angel, I would have been more patient. I would have stayed calm for 15 seconds! 😉
lol… Oh my gosh, what a funny story. Thanks for using it as a teaching moment for us all. Awesome!
So glad you enjoyed, John. Frankly my wife laughed out loud. Of course she knows how humble I am. 🙂 Cheers
I find that retirement gives me more time to be patient. I’ll send you an interesting story about being locked out of one’s room.
Thanks Jim. I’ll never forget my key again.
This is the generation of impatience, as we have been programmed to expect things now. It is a challenging emotion to change.
That’s the truth, Gerry. I’d write more but I’m in a hurry. 😉
Dear Dan,
An interesting thought-provoking post!
We need to control our arrogance and anger showing good patience and the needed empathy in various situations. I feel that we need to forget our ego and the professional/social status while requesting actions per our desire especially when we are wrong.
We need to wait in patience and value the time, attention & efforts put by a person to solve our problems. Just observe the things and sit comfortably instead of standing furiously! Things work better when we think differently and show humility rather than ask things by way our rights,
Thanks Dr. Asher. “Just observe…” All I needed to do was look around! Cheers
Love the sticky note idea. Every manager / leader should put that on the their monitor. They should also have a sign inspired by Ben Zander: “Remember Rule #6. Don’t take yourself so damn seriously.”
Thanks Joel. Love Ben Zander and rule #6. I also love one buttock playing.
Each of us needs to control our arrogance, but I find that in a position of leadership, arrogance is especially egregious because it gives evidence to the stereotype that leaders really don’t care about people and are merely chasing the bottom line. Moments of arrogance can do a lot of damage to what has been built over time. Luckily this encounter was with someone you are not likely to see again. Be grateful for that! Love your postings and have learned from you…
Thanks Margaret. Looks like an uncaring attitude reflects arrogant leadership. Ouch! That’s powerful.
Ah, the left key in room.. short story…
when.my son was little, he and I went out of the room to get some breakfast and didn’t take our key nor any ID. Imagine our chagrin at having to go to desk and say we were locked out and had no ID to show who we were,
The worst by far though was admitting we didn’t even know our room number!!
Thankfully my husband was in the room so staff was able to confirm who we were and tell us our room number!
Love it Pam. Your story is an encouragement!! Happy Hotelling.
Hello Dan,
I definitely agree that impatience can lead to arrogance. I mean after all, doesn’t this person realize how busy I am and how important my time is?
I reviewed your recommendations with my wife. Not because she needs them, but because I can absolutely see instances in my own life where arrogance can raise it’s head. I like your recommendations, especially #3. My wife also got a good laugh out of that one.
Jay
Thanks Jay. YES! People should know that the world revolves around me!!
When we’re infants it’s OK to think the world revolves around us. Those days are long gone.
Best to your wife!
Ironically, I have a tattoo of the Sacred Heart with the Latin work Charitas or “Charity”. Similar to humility, I am reminded to be humble and charitable daily! I do not want to betray my tat!
Love it! Thanks Frank.
I could use a giant sticky note like that. Or a whole stack! Great reminders, Dan!