Winning: Confusion about Winning Leads to Losing
All the cars in the junk yard have empty tanks.
The anatomy of winning:
Winning requires an ending.
A race that has no end has no winner. Even the longest car races in the world had an ending.
A race without an end is pointless.
A world without endings is filled with losing.
The necessity of endings:
Always ‘on’ leads to inevitable defeat.
Weariness is the consequence of rushing from one thing to the next without an ending. Weariness leads to lethargy.
Defeat is the child of fatigue.
Designing wins:
Short projects enable quick wins.
- Send three gratitude emails in 5 minutes.
- Notice someone’s strength at the end of a conversation.
- At the beginning of your next meeting, describe why you’re thankful to work with your team.
- Deal with one nagging issue. Respond to that nagging email.
- Inquire about a project that concerns you. End the conversation by defining a next step or a milestone.
Finish something, even if it’s a milestone on a long-term project.
Making wins work:
Suppose you send three gratitude emails in five minutes (#1 above). But you rush to the next pressing issue without noticing the win.
An unnoticed win is defeat.
Before you rush to the next thing, pat yourself on the back for finishing one thing. Breathe deeply for 30-seconds and record your win in a win journal. “Sent 3 gratitude emails.”
A pat on the back is fuel for the next win.
Arrogance scoffs at small wins.
Maybe a little humility will allow you to make a list of small wins in your day. I bet it’s longer than you think.
How might leaders create wins?
How might leaders put fuel in their own tank?
wow…you nailed it. “Arrogance scoffs at small wins.” That’s me sometimes…and I need to improve. Thanks for the mirror and encouragement.
Thanks Brian. It’s so easy to forget that you’re making a positive difference in a million small ways. You have my respect for passionately working to make a difference in a turbulent sector.
As I was reading I thought, “Hey, I can do #1-#5 every day… yay me!” and then I read on… Acknowledging my own wins is tougher. Win journal seems much more complicated. “An unnoticed win is defeat.” Indeed. Thank you for this, I am consistently amazed how you get to the point so succinctly.
Thanks bardohn. Noticing our own wins seems so much harder than noticing the wins of others. So glad to be useful. That’s a win for me.
Brilliant. We need to pause and accept the win before moving on too quickly (such a temptation to keep rushing!). Learn to celebrate, especially the humble wins. Momentum comes from a series of small wins. Thanks for continuing to write and inspire us! I need it.
Thanks Dave. One of my favorite quotes is “momentum comes from a series of small wins.” No wins. No momentum. I’m so glad you brought this up.
I’m not sure that scoffing at small wins is just arrogance. I see places where the small wins aren’t even keeping pace with the new problems. It’s hard to celebrate rearranging the deckchairs when it feels like the ship is sinking
Thanks Mitch. Perhaps there’s a difference between a small win and irrelevant action. Moving the deck chairs is irrelevant. Plugging a few holes might be a small win, but if the ship is sinking, at least it’s relevant.
To your point, I’m sure scoffing at small wins is more than arrogance. In my case, arrogance is a big contributor to scoffing at small wins.
Dan,
You are one of my gratitude emails. Gosh I thank you! Each day I look forward to your one page treasures of encouragement. Not one idea goes by that I don’t take a note or two and think about later. You are a winner!
Thanks Linda. Your email is an opportunity for both of us to be winners. 🙂
Dan,
We are all winners somedays others think differently, more like succeeding so if that’s a “winner”, another day waits for us to be a “Loser”. Hmm seems cruel these classifications that develop, either we finish or we never reach the end as you mention. Have a great weekend!
I’m on board with Linda, look forward every day to your mindful genuine ways to succeed….
Thank you for your continued thoughtfulness, and your encouragement to make sure we recognize wins.
I wonder if there’s another possibility besides losing when there’s not a defined ending – perhaps it could be, as Steven Simak and others write, an infinite game? It does seem, however, that if someone stays in a *competitive* state without end there will indeed be burnout.
At the start of each day, I look through my calendar and master list of next actions (that is, the list of possible actions I can take to move my projects forward). I also look through the list of things that I’m waiting on other people for. From this review, I write down on an A6 sheet of paper all the things that I’ll be involved in during the day. That is, all the meetings go on the list. So do some of the actions and some of the things I’m waiting for. I cross these off the list as I go. Each one crossed off, is a small win – I *know* it’s a win, because each of them is in some way connected to a larger project. And at the end of the day I have a (small) piece of paper with lots of crossed-off things. The smallness often reminds me of my own limitations – while having lots of crossed-off things at the end of the day, is a real boost to my motivation.
Thanks Johan. Such a powerful practice. Sadly, many leaders just run from one fire to the next without thinking about their accomplishments. It’s draining when that happens. A check list is one way to slow down long enough to notice an accomplishment.