7 Things You Would Love to Say to an Intimidating Boss
We lie to an intimidating boss because they influence our success at work.
An intimidating boss seldom hears the truth. An approachable boss hears the truth occasionally.
Image by Lynn Wilson from Pixabay
7 things people would love to say to an intimidating boss:
#1. Please see me as a real person, not a tool.
Don’t get too personal, but express interest in my life outside work.
Express interest in my well-being.
#2. Give me a chance to feel good about my work.
Would you chill out for a few minutes before you press me to reach the next goal?
#3. Would you please relax when we talk?
Presence is paying attention to what’s in front of you. Stop thinking about the next thing while you’re standing in front of me.
#4. Let me know my contribution makes a difference.
Ask me about the things I’m working on. Encourage me to feel good about good work.
#5. Just give me a straight answer.
Tell me when you can’t talk about something because of privacy, timing, or other factors. Don’t blow smoke.
#6. Reward me for supporting the team.
Acknowledge that star performers stand on other people’s work and support.
Stop rewarding individual contributors and ignoring the teams that support them.
#7. Please don’t correct the team when it’s one person.
Deal with performance issues in private. Speak with individuals not everyone. Please don’t make another rule for everyone because one person is an idiot.
Bonus: Passion is pushy when projects take precedence over people.
What would people like to tell an intimidating boss?
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I would say “People are not honest with you because they don’t trust you”
Thanks for jumping in today, Danielle.
My suggestion to tell the boss: Make me feel I am on your list of priorities.
Love the way you worded that, cvanagarajan.
I read this as 7 things I should be doing as a boss.
Good take on it, Tim. Thank you for jumping in, today.
I see this as something I should be doing in all aspects of my life, not just as a boss.
I particularly like the “correct the person, not the team” because it reminds me of a now-retired director who used to say “because one person poops their pants, we all have to wear diapers” whenever a new policy addressing the behavior of a few came out. His phrase was a bit more colorful than mine, but you get the picture. So true, especially in larger organizations that tend use a wide brush rather than an eraser to correct problems.
Thanks Laurie. I wish I would have thought of the “poops their pants” sentence. Love it. I want to remember that one.
This may be one of my favorite posts yet. Thanks, Dan!
Thanks, Rosemarie. You encourage me.
I would say, “Come down to the trenches more often to visit and see what we are doing on a day-to-day basis before criticizing.” We need more walk around leaders!
So true, Joseph. Show up. Ask a few questions. Meet a few people.
I have found that even nice bosses can be intimidating. I work with several CEOs who are genuinely kind, thoughtful, and caring. Yet, they are still intimidating. The reason? They hold the economic future of their employees in their hand. Even if they are regarded as a really great leader, they still have the power to fire anyone they want to. I’ve seen this phenomenon over and over again. I saw it when I ran large companies. Possibly it’s because workers have been in other places where bosses fired people out of the blue. I guess they might be shellshocked.
Thanks, John. So true. I see the same thing. Leaders need to work harder than they think they need to to lower the natural feeling of intimidation people feel.