Do This to Answer Anxiety
Some anxiety is destructive. Other forms of anxiety improve life. Is your heart racing while you get ready for work? That’s not all bad. Are you alert during tense conversations? I hope so.
Anxiety means you care, but caring can become destructive.
Answer Anxiety:
Leaders worry (care deeply) about employee engagement, creating environments where people can flourish, and getting stuff done.
Thinking without action intensifies distress. Healthy anxiety guides behaviors.
Destructive concern loves to remind you of things you can’t do. You can’t control people. You can’t guarantee plans will work. However, you can control yourself by designing action steps.
- What simple actions promote employee engagement?
- How can you influence environments in ways that make strong relationships more likely?
- What will you do today to make your plan work? Plans without action become painful memories.
Destructive concern turns your inner eye on yourself. Self-reflection is healthy when it teaches you how to contribute. Self-reflection goes wrong when all you think about are disappointments, pain, and what you want from others.
Turn your attention to outward-facing action when you feel anxiety.
Worry fixes its attention on the worst that could happen. I have learned to think about what I will do if the worst happens. For example, what if I embarrass myself by saying something stupid? I will apologize. “I want to apologize for what I just said. It was stupid.”
Prepare for the worst. If you’re anxious about a meeting, prepare. If you’re worried about a presentation, practice. Preparation doesn’t eliminate concerns, it focuses them.
Practice gratitude when you’re worried. Make a list of your worries. Make another list of everything you are thankful for. The best expression of gratitude is being thankful for opportunities to serve.
When does anxiety become destructive?
How can leaders answer deep concerns?
Still curious:
3 Ways to Stop Worrying and Lead
Don’t let worry become a leadership weakness
A little book about humility.
John David Mann and I provide an opportunity to explore structured self-reflection in our book, The Vagrant.
Many of the experiences of the protagonist reflect my own. I believe you will see yourself in the story, at least in part.
The exercises at the end enable you to take self-reflection to the next level.
Dan, thanks. Your words of exhortation hit home today. Right when needed.
My pleasure, Dale. A good word is fuel for the day. Thank you.
“Plans without action become painful memories”…great line! Even when not developed as formal plans, I find that there is not much that can fuel regret more than inaction.
Thanks Dan!
Great point, WP. We are more likely to regret the things we didn’t do than the things we did – as long as we have reasonable certainty we aren’t doing harm.
I love the reframing of anxiety as a positive. We tend to overly emphasize negative repercussions of anxiety and interpret the physical and mental response as debilitating and out of our control. Personally, I find that my anxiety is directly connected to my tendency to procrastinate (aka delay action). This simple reminder that action quells anxiety is timely. Thanks Dan.
Wonderful insight, Susan. Procrastination creates unnecessary stress. It’s like wondering all day if we left the stove on. There’s enough stress in life. We don’t need to add to it.
Thank you Dan for the excellent article!
As the father, brother, and son of people with varrying levels of anxiety, I have seen the negative impact that this can have on one’s life and relationships.
And I also agree 100% with the ideas you discuss here. I know in my interactions with my family that a couple of the best ways to address anxiety are to 1) recognize the opportunity to show emphathy for others, and 2) take action. I too have also found that “what could happen” typically does not happen, even when things go wrong.
Thank you,
Jay
Thanks for dropping in today, Jay. Your addition of the idea that anxiety in others is an opportunity for empathy and action is important. Empathy isn’t part of this post so you added a new dimension to the discussion.
Thanks Dan, I needed this. Overwhelmed and anxious the last several days, the words “Thinking without action intensifies distress” hit home. Too much overthinking and rumination.