Do What Makes You Unhappy
“Do what makes you happy” is bad advice.
“Life is not about you. It’s about what you do for others.” Tom Rath
The saying, “Life is too short to be unhappy” overlooks the value of meaningful discomfort.
Don’t do what makes you happy. Do what makes a difference.
Unhappy Temporarily
- Apologies feel awkward.
- Exercise hurts.
- Saving money means saying no.
- Giving feedback is uncomfortable.
- Forgiveness feels unfair.
- Leading requires difficult conversations.
The road to making a difference is paved with temporary discomfort.
Meaning Before Comfort
Happiness runs deeper than good feelings.
Sacrifice often leads to lasting contribution.
Leaders regularly choose discomfort.
- They disappoint people.
- They say no.
- They confront problems.
- They tell the truth.
- They delay gratification.
- They sacrifice convenience.
Do what serves the mission, even when it doesn’t feel good.
Choose contribution over comfort.
What uncomfortable choice could make you more useful today?
On the other hand: Breaking the Glum-Leader Syndrome – Leadership Freak
Hi Dan,
This resonates with me. As an example, I regularly hear young people choosing university paths based on how enjoyable their tenure at a certain school is likely to be. I remind them this is a place to be enduringly ‘from’ and only fleetingly ‘at’. So, I urge them to choose where to spend their time and effort with a wider perspective Bon weekend, Dan and all ! ~ Cate
Thanks for a practical illustration of this idea. When the pursuit of happiness leads to short-term thinking it has a dark side. And a great weekend to you too, Cate.
I think it’s important to separate “happiness” from the idea that being happy means there is no discomfort or effort required. Long term happiness is achieved through achieving a meaningful life. Nothing in that implies that there is no sacrifice, discomfort, or effort. I think there are many people that think something that brings you happiness should be easy. That’s not true.
For example: I am an animal lover. My dogs, cats, and horses bring me such joy and happiness. However, in order for me to have that joy, it is a lot of work and sacrifice. Their care and maintenance cost money, require my undivided attention, and physical effort to have them in my life. But there is no greater feeling than when one of them looks at me with unfiltered happiness and love.
Makes the work and effort I put into it worthwhile. Same things goes for anything else you find worthwhile and meaningful in life.