Bad Help

Helping puffs your ego even when it harms others.

Tender-hearted leaders make people weak when they help badly.

You show up for others. Expect others to show up for themselves.

5 Ways to Help Badly

• Doing someone’s work instead of helping them develop.
• Intervening when no one asked.
• Offering solutions before understanding the problem.
• Causing someone to feel incompetent.
• Inviting people to rely on you instead of developing capability.

5 Questions Before Helping

• What are you trying to accomplish?
• How much of this is your job?
• What have you tried?
• What’s getting in the way?
• What kind of help would be useful?

The goal of helping is enabling, not more helping.

3 Reflection Questions

• How much of my eagerness to help is ego?
• What makes me believe I understand what’s not working?
• Is this a competence issue or a willingness issue?

What kind of help do you enjoy receiving? Giving?

Cure Chronic Help-Seekers – Leadership Freak

Read: How to Offer, Give, and Receive Help by Edgar Schein.