Selfish coward or loyal supporter
“My boss threw me under the buss.”
“I did most of the work but my boss took all of the credit.”
“I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard my supervisor taking credit for my ideas.”
“I was blamed for something a co-worker did and my boss knew the truth and didn’t do anything about it.”
These are a sampling of quotes from emails I have received. They all reflect the anguish, disappointment, pain, and fear some employees experience because they work for selfish cowards.
Beyond cowardice – a more excellent way
In *Leadership Under Pressure, Colonel Bob Stewart offers seasoned counsel, “Care about those who work for you before you concern yourself with pleasing superiors.”
One expression of caring is loyalty. Loyalty is surprisingly simple. However, loyalty requires courage.
Three ways to stand with your people
First, if you’re a self-serving coward, everyone already knows. Turn the corner on cowardice by apologizing in private to your victims. Don’t make a big deal about it. Just take responsibility. Then begin publicly honoring your team. Lastly, the next time the team fails say, “I screwed up.”
People are drawn to selfless honesty and repelled by selfish deceit.
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Let’s talk about it. What’s your take on, “Care about those who work for you before you concern yourself with pleasing superiors?”
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Pressing personal needs
Leadership Freak
Dan Rockwell
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*Leadership Under Pressure is a book of lessons learned and shared in personal stories by Colonel Bob Stewart. He was the first British United Nations Commander in Bosnia. On return from Bosnia, Stewart was awarded the Distinguished Service Order. Colonel Stewart’s quote came from Leadership Now
I have found more often than not that employees and leaders that practice back stabbing typically have a very difficult time overcoming this habit because they know they can get away with it. One reason centers on so many of us have become so motivated by Affiliation that we are worried what others will think of us and, heaven forbid, we might lose them as so called “friends.” Another reason comes when a leader allows his HR manager or his legal counsel to control his behavior and actions when it comes to holding others accountable for their behavior – Don’t want to be facing a law suit or have to fill out all that paperwork. Finally, there are just too many narcissistic managers that don’t want to be bothered by others behavior because they carry the biggest knife.
Jim,
You make a great point. Trying to change direction can be like stopping an avalanche. There are so many issues involved. I wonder if we’ll hear a success story?
Loving hearing from. Thanks for giving back to others.
Dan
Being a manager means being in the middle between employees and owners. There are situations where you are protecting and supporting employees, yet they view your actions as self serving. As a manager you often have information and perspective that employees do not have and although your behavior may appear to be benefitting yourself, it is often for the support of your employees. Balancing the competing needs of running a business and supporting the people in it can be one of the most difficult parts of being a manager.
V Hurless,
Thank you for leaving your first comment. Freak reads tell me they enjoy reading everyone’s perspective. Thinking about Colonel Stewart’s comment, I thought he left out the needs of the business/customer. Of course his comment centered on the dynamic between upper management – middle management – employee so I tried to limit my thinking to that dynamic. Perhaps I shouldn’t have. Perhaps Colonel Stewart meant his comment as a universal statement? I haven’t read his book so I’m not sure.
Regarding balancing the competing needs of running a business and supporting the people… Southwest Airlines puts it this way, “Employees will be provided the same concern, respect, and caring attitude within the organization that they are expected to share externally with every Southwest Customer.”
You left useful commens… thanks
Regards,
Dan
In my career, I have found that a boss who truly has your back is indeed a rare find. Seeing as how superiors are a lot like relatives (you rarely get to pick them for yourself), you are pretty much stuck with what you get. I have found that I was most miserable working for the manager who did not want to rock the boat – he would not fight for you or defend you because he did not want to stick his neck out. Although this manager was a great guy, I hated working for him. On the flip side, the best manager I ever worked for would fight tooth and nail for his team. In public, he would praise you and give you credit. If corrective action was needed, it was done behind closed doors. And do you know what the difference was? The team for the first guy performed in the middle of the pack and we didn’t really go out of our way for him. The second one? The entire team would have killed or died for him. Work extra hours or weekends? No problem. Cover a conference call for him? You got it. When his promotion came, while we very happy for him, we knew that it would be long time before we worked for someone of that caliber again. As I move forward in my career, I am constantly thinking about these two managers. As I work with my direct reports, who would they say I am? It is my hope that it is the later and not the former.
Jason,
Thank you for leaving your first comment on Leadership Freak. You left a great story that instructs and encourages. I appreciate it. You make me think of the old adage, “you get what you give.” If you want loyalty, give it. If you want disloyalty, give it.
Since you and V Hurless are first timers, I hope you keep coming back.
Cheers,
Dan
Dan, I try to work hard at making amends continuously when the other person is partly to blame for the trouble.And along with this be quick to apologize to children and co workers as we would to people of power and prominence.
Bill,
The words I see in your comment are “continuously” and “quick.” These words partially explain the challenge of creating trusting environments.
Best to you,
Dan