How to Avoid the Truly Dangerous Thing While Seeking Feedback
“We define our dialogue and, in a sense, our future through the questions we choose to address.” Peter Block
Seeking feedback includes asking great questions and making space for people to provide thoughtful responses.
4 components of seeking feedback:
- Include several members of the team. Feedback from many sources is more useful than feedback from one person.
- Avoid the truly dangerous practice of asking wrong questions.
- Address foundational behaviors, not passing anomalies.
- Shy away from yes or no questions.
- Provide an opportunity for thoughtful response.
- Engage in forward-facing conversations. Discuss the past to better create the future.
A simple form for seeking feedback:
Openness:
- On a scale of 1 to 10, how open is Fred?
- When you think of openness, what comes to mind?
Provide an opportunity to define terms.
Decisiveness:
- On a scale of 1 to 10, how decisive is Fred?
- When you think of decisiveness, what comes to mind?
10 potential topics for feedback:
- Inspiration.
- Collaboration.
- Delivering results.
- Building relationships.
- Supportiveness.
- Developing others.
- Listening.
- Challenging people to reach high.
- Addressing tough issues.
- Showing compassion.
2 followup questions:
Single question feedback-forms are marginally useful. Sometimes they’re demotivating.
The first question is useful. Followup questions are transformational.
#1. Why didn’t you choose a lower number?
Suppose the person giving feedback gave Fred an 8 on decisiveness. Ask, “Why didn’t you choose a lower number?”
Question #1 provides an opportunity to see strengths through the eyes of others.
#2. If Fred was a 9 on decisiveness, instead of an 8, what would be true of him?
Give people an opportunity to help feedback recipients reach the next level. Choose the next higher number and explore how to get there.
Note: Use this simple form to seek feedback for yourself as well as others.
How might leaders create interactions that result in great feedback?
What might you add to the form I suggest?
Nice. And Block and Drucker. Solid anchors from people with solid perspective.
For discussion, you do NOT need a scale but simply a line from high to low, since some people are reticent to give numbers. You can get the drift from where the mark is on the line (and you can measure it if you have to).
For performance improvement, the absolute best feedback is self-generated and anchored to timeliness and accuracy on key things related to desired results. Waiting for someone else is like waiting on the piano teacher to tell you how you played the silent piano.
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Thanks Dr. Scott. A line with a high end and a low end feels really great. Just put a mark on the line.
Why didn’t you place the mark more to the left?
What would be true if the mark was more to the right?
It feels more human.
Your suggestion on timely feedback is right on. We need feedback in the moment. However, there is a place for scheduled feedback. We don’t always receive feedback in the moment.
I love the concept of asking “why not a lower number” because it sets up the response to be framed with positive thinking. I also love the idea of the high to low line, instead of number ratings, that Dr. Scott suggested. Thank you!
Thanks Don. Love your handle. It’s important to include the positive side. Cheers
Dan I have used a relative 1 to 10 scale to advise or mentor individuals. I place a peer we both know on the scale and ask where they would then place themselves. This can lead to some very good conversation and gives you a chance to suggest areas for improvement. Other scales can be the level of Assertiveness or ability to work with other groups, etc.
Brad
Thanks Brad. Brilliant. Create an anchor point. You might ask them to think of someone who is very decisive. “Where would you put them?” Then as you indicate, “Where are you on the line?”
This strategy helps people who overestimate their skills. It provides an opportunity to pursue improvement.
We should add that it’s not about negative comparisons.
When you ask people to scale themselves, some scale higher and some lower than where others perceive them to be. Modest people will usually scale themselves lower than a highly confident or egocentric person. Asking them to scale another then rate themselves against them, gives you an indicator of how they see themselves in relation to others, similar to a 360 degree evaluation. It also gives you an insight into their personality, self esteem and confidence levels. In turn you have a platform from which to coach and mentor them accordingly.
Thanks Carolyn. Great observations.
For me, the location on the line is not as important as the conversation. Why didn’t you choose a lower number? What would be true of you if you were a 9 instead of an 8?
Having said that, your point about self-perception is helpful.
Dan: I like your phrase “the location on the line is not as important as the conversation”. You built your wisdom and your blog on conversations. You are constantly looking for ways to create a meaningful dialogue. So, the question I have for organizations who feel the need to launch surveys: “Are you willing to invest in great conversations with your people? And, if so, what is the best way to engage?”
Thanks Ron. Your focus on great conversations needs more attention. I think we correct when we should have a conversation. Sometimes we make organizational policies when we should have conversations.
Organizations are the sum of their conversations. (I got that from my friend and coach, Bob Hancox)
As you say, a conversation is an investment.
After a few years of market research interviewing, I’ve found that unless people feel very strongly one way or another, they will tend towards the median if undecided, ie: If not really sure and given a scale of 1-10 they will usually hem and haw and choose number 5.
Thanks Robynne. I’ve read articles about using a 4 point scale to avoid this tendency. But in the end, I really like the idea of a line without numbers. Perhaps a 0 at one end and a 10 at the other.
What is the truly dangerous question ?
Do you mean the closed question that yields pretty much nothing or the question which makes people not give you accurate feedback for fear of reprisals or destroying someone or the question which allows others to tittle tattle?
Thanks teacher. Those are dangerous questions. Perhaps questions that ask about the wrong things are dangerous as well.
Hi Dan,
I recently surveyed some teachers who left our school. I asked them these questions. I’ve received substantive feedback that is helping me ask questions of our teaching coaches to better support our teachers right now.
How did the job match your expectations?
Did you feel that the work you were doing aligned with your personal goals and interests?
Did you have the tools and resources you needed to effectively do your job?
Would you recommend this as a great place for a friend to work?
What was your relationship with your principal(s) like?
What did you like the most about your job here?
What did you dislike the most about your job here?
Why did you leave our organization?
What advice do you have for our organization moving forward?
Thanks for your amazing daily blog!
~ Andy Lindsay
Thanks Andy. We can learn much from people who are heading out the door. It can be painful. Sometimes they overstate. But, if we use their feedback to make things better, it’s worth it.
I wonder how scaled questions might work for the kind of feedback you were seeking.
Place a mark on the line. How much did you job match your expectations? Then have the conversation about where they put the mark.
Best wishes as you move forward.