Forgiveness: The Invisible Derailer that Frustrates Leaders

Attitudes are invisible but they always show themselves somehow. Your attitude toward disappointment can make or break your leadership.

The way you deal with disappointment is a lid or a platform.

Stumbling toward derailment:

  1. Unresolved disappointment leads to negative ruminating.
  2. Negative ruminating leads to anxiety and frustration.
  3. Unresolved frustrations lead to resentment.

Resentment derails success.

Image of birds bathing in muddy water.

Resentment is messy. It always splashes on bystanders.

Challenge:

Forgiveness is always appropriate. An offense that lives in your heart rots your life, pollutes your perspective, and

The challenge of forgiveness can’t be delegated.

You’re the only one who can kiss an offense goodbye. It doesn’t matter what other people have done or will do.

Forgiveness is always about you.

Forgiveness isn’t about how deserving someone is. It’s about how big your heart can grow.

Forgiveness is letting go of the desire to punish.

Resentment:

Resentment is holding pain in your heart.

Resentment is messy. It always splashes bystanders.

Resentment always contaminates others. Friends who weren’t directly involved in your issue take offense. They choose sides in a battle that isn’t theirs.

Resentment on a team grinds down trust and fractures relationships.

Forgiveness:

Forgiveness is letting go of an offense.

Forgiveness is a repetitive process.

The strength to extend forgiveness comes from received forgiveness. People give you second chances all the time.

The next time you struggle to forgive remember that others have forgiven you.

Reconciliation:

Forgiveness is always appropriate, but reconciliation might not be.

The opportunity of reconciliation involves others.

It’s not appropriate to restore a close relationship with an abusive spouse, for example, but it’s always right to forgive them. You might not reconcile with an employee who stole, but forgiveness still applies.

Always extend forgiveness even if reconciliation is inappropriate.

What aspects of forgiveness seem most difficult?