Thieves of Thankfulness – 3 Traits That Inhibit Gratitude
I searched, “What’s good about ingratitude,” and the article at the top of the page was titled, “14 Health Benefits of Practicing Gratitude According to Science.”
I searched, “Benefits of ingratitude,” and the first article was, “The BENEFITS of Gratitude.”
Google must think I need help.
Benefits of ingratitude:
- Distrust of others.
- Weak relationships.
- Poor health.
The only thing good about ingratitude is thankfully you’ll die sooner than grateful people. You’ll be out of your misery. Positive emotion can help you live 10% to 15% longer.
Thieves of thankfulness – 3 Traits that Inhibit Gratitude:
Philip Watkins’s research indicates narcissism, cynicism, and envy/materialism are thieves of thankfulness. Narcissism is most deadly.
I decided to see if I was materialistic, cynical, and/or narcissistic. The results were disappointing.
You might be a narcissist if you:
- Have an excessive sense of grandeur. I want to change my last name to ‘Grande’. Danny Grande’ has a real ring to it. Don’t you think?
- Feel you’re worthy of special treatment. I don’t really feel like I deserve special treatment, but I seem to enjoy getting on airplanes ahead of others.
- Often monopolize conversations. (The trouble with this one is you don’t notice it.)
- Have shallow relationships. People are important only as they bring benefit.
- Think others are always out to get something from you.
- Love perfectionism.
- Struggle to deal with criticism.
- Frequently demean others.
- Blame others for your behavior.
- Can’t compromise.
Why gratitude is difficult:
If you don’t need others, but others need you, gratitude is a strain.
Gratitude acknowledges benefits received.
If you get bent out of shape when others don’t respond quickly to your emails or give you special treatment when you show up, gratitude is a burr under your saddle.
Entitlement and gratitude don’t play together well.
A little humility might up your gratitude game.
Why is gratitude difficult?
Part 2: Thieves of Thankfulness – Why Cynics Struggle with Gratitude
Gratitude often needs purposeful discovery to flourish while ingratitude often needs little goading to spread like crabgrass. That’s how I see the difficulty of continuing to make gratitude a routine perspective for most folks.
Thanks Scott. Often the negatives of life seem brighter than the positives…specially if you watch the drama mongers on cable news. 🤷♂️
Thanks for all of your thoughts, concepts and writings, Dan! You make us all better Leaders with everything you do and give us! Happy Thanksgiving to you and your Family!
Thank you Sam. I appreciate your kind words. Happy Thanksgiving to you and to your family as well.
Perfect lesson for the holidays and EVERY DAY. Happy & Blessed Thanksgiving, Dan, to you and yours!
Thanks Kym. “and EVERY DAY.” 🙂
Happy Thanksgiving! Envy is the thief with which I deal. But I’ve been promised all things in Christ Jesus. The end of Psalm 16 has become especially meaningful. At his right hand is fullness of joy! I’ll miss out on nothing. That’s my constant reminder.
Thanks Pete. I don’t have a problem with envy — unless I’m around someone who has more than me.
I am grateful for your wonderful insight, sage words, and daily messages. I enjoy reading your emails first thing every day before I begin work. You really make a difference, so thank you, kindly, and have a most wonderful Thanksgiving!
I’m grateful for this body and intellect, the ugliness and the beauty, my Beloveds, this living Being who is Earth.
I would like to also gift you a shard of wisdom, as a show of gratitude for yours:
Meritocracy is not at the heart of gratitude–
realizing that one is truly alive, is.
A slightly disturbing observation is that seven out of the ten narcissistic traits on your list above are considered to be positive attributes in the operation of contract research organisations.