Expect Responsibility Without Being a Jerk-Hole
Sincere managers unintentionally take responsibility for other people’s jobs.
People get dumb and weak when you solve problems for them. Being the answer-manager builds your ego and weakens your team.
Stop pressuring yourself to solve everyone’s problems. The more problems you solve, the more people expect you to solve their problems.
Expect Responsibility:
People are responsible to do their job. You’re irresponsible when you do it for them. Have this conversation the next time someone asks you to solve something for them…
- They say, “Boss, I have a problem I want to give you.”
- You say, “What have you tried?”
Team members won’t literally say, “I want you to own my problem.” But they plan to leave their problem with you when they walk away. Don’t rush to pick up problems that belong to someone else.
Asking, “What have you tried?” places responsibility where it belongs. Smile. Be pleasant and expect people to do their job.
If you have been the “answer-manager” their response is likely, “I haven’t tried anything.” It’s good for them to acknowledge reality. Don’t punish them. Take responsibility for teaching them to be helpless.
When their eyes go to the ceiling and they say, “I don’t know,” say, “If you did know, what would you do?” Expect people to challenge themselves. If they still don’t know, ask, “Who might know?”
If they still can’t think of anything, say, “Let’s see if ‘we’ can come up with a solution that works for you.”
What makes holding people responsible difficult?
What would you add to the plan suggested in this post?
Author’s note: I’ve written about this before. I was reminded of this issue during a coaching conversation yesterday and thought it might be useful to hit this topic again. Also, some problems people bring you do belong to you.
Still curious:
4 Surprising Things Leaders Aren’t Responsible For
Stop Doing Your Team’s Work for Them
We call that passing the monkey. These are great tips for passing the monkey back to its rightful owner!
Great video, Laurie. For anyone who is interested, the monkey metaphor comes from a classic HBR article titled, Management Time: Who’s Got the Monkey.
The article is online here: https://www.med.unc.edu/uncaims/wp-content/uploads/sites/764/2014/03/Oncken-_-Wass-Who_s-Got-the-Monkey.pdf
“Laurie, great video—thank you!
Whenever I’m presented with a problem, my first question is always, ‘Who owns this problem?’ Many of my former employees and students were eager to hand off their challenges to me. As the video explains, it’s tempting to take on others’ problems for various ego-boosting reasons. But as Dan points out, doing so not only stifles the employee’s growth but also leads to our own overwhelm.
Let’s keep ownership where it belongs. We can coach and offer guidance, but the responsibility for solving the problem should remain with the employee.
Love, “Who owns this problem?” It provides clarity and responsibility. It also sets people free to either act or refrain from acting.
Hi. I’ve been enjoying your daily email for over a year now and have learned so much! Although I totally agree with the message of your blog today, I was taken aback by the wording to the following statement in your summary email: “People get dumb and weak when you solve problems for them.” I don’t think it is necessary to call anyone “dumb” no matter what point you are trying to express. Even though your topics are meant for leaders, most leaders also have someone they report up to. Please be more careful with your wording in the future to not put anyone down in a derogatory way.
PS: I am currently being ‘micromanaged’ by my superior and it is crushing to my self esteem and my ability to do my job effectively, so this is an extremely important message.
Thanks for your feedback, B. I suppose I could have said, “People miss learning opportunities,” instead of saying people get dumb. I’ll try to balance my desire to be clear with the importance of being polite.
Being micromanaged insults people’s talent, initiative, and drive. Leaders who micromanage do dumb things. 🙂
I wish you success even though you’re experiencing destructive leadership. Here’s a tip someone gave me when dealing with a micromanager. Proactively send them updates and information. If necessary, overwhelm them with information. Don’t wait for them to come to you. Go to them. Just a thought.
A bad boss is discouraging. I’m confident you are rising above their incompetence.
Training people in leadership positions to be leaders is so important. Preparing them to be able to deal with employees that want the “boss” to handle tasks or issues that the employee should be doing is a challenge for an organization. It should not be taken lightly. Investing in good leadership training is a must!
Wonderful insight, Tim. The problem of doing other people’s jobs is often caused by sincerity defeating wisdom. Managers usually change quickly when they realize they are harming themselves and others by being too helpful.
“Also, some problems people bring you do belong to you.”. This is an important piece of the overall advice. The leader needs to take responsibility for breaking down the barriers that must be addressed at a leadership level.
Glad you jumped in, Ryan. So true. And important.
Some of the issues that come to leaders belong to them.
I have a strong appreciation for the concepts of perspective and leadership.
There is a leadership perspective for sure. The best way to earn promotions is to adopt a leader’s perspective before you earn a leadership position.
I love this. Your choice of words shows professionalism, respect, and confidence in the other person. Thanks, Travis
So true, Travis. It’s easy to communicate fear and disrespect. I remember a leader telling the team, “I’m worried we won’t reach this goal.” He should have said, “The path ahead is challenging. I’m counting on everyone to rise to the challenge. Let’s talk about ways we can move forward aggressively.