A Contrarian Approach to Growth
Rigid certainty doesn’t think, it defends. In all your learning, learn to be a learner.
You expand when you explore and contract when you know. We begin to grow when we know we don’t know.
Arrogance knows. Humility grows.
A contrarian approach to Growth
#1. Wait for the what-about moment. Quick answers feel right. Solve slowly. Lean into confusion instead of running from it.
#2. Listen to people you don’t like. Irritating people are different from you. Learning is exploring difference.
#3. Go with before pushing against. Seek to understand an idea before you challenge it. Ask yourself, “What if they’re right?”
#4. Open the door to doubt. Say, “I could be wrong.” The person who knows is missing something. Too much doubt paralyzes, but a little doubt creates opportunity.
#5. Learn from discomfort. Pain teaches more than comfort.
#6. Adopt other people’s perspective. People on the front line may not know as much as you but their viewpoint matters. It’s incredible that a VP who has never done the work has the audacity to know how the work should be done.
#7. Don’t pretend you know. Fake knowledge is foolishness parading as wisdom. Say, “I’m not sure, but let’s find out.” Overconfidence boasts of knowledge it doesn’t have.
#8. Try something that feels awkward. Things that feel right align with the past and keep you doing more of the same.
#9. Record your ideas. Writing is thinking. Thoughts that sound smart in your head look dumb on paper.
#10. Say, “That’s interesting,” when you hear something that seems wrong. “Tell me more,” is an open door. “That’s wrong,” slams it shut.
Which idea in this post feels most relevant to your situation?
I like–“Too much doubt paralyzes, but a little doubt creates opportunity.”
But also believe it is important to remember this–Don’t doubt what you know to be true. Some people try to manipulate the facts to suit their purpose.
Thanks, Paul. Doubt isn’t a virtue. It’s a skill. I’m glad you bring up the importance of confidence. A leader without confidence is a follower.
“Say, “That’s interesting,” when you hear something that seems wrong. “Tell me more,” is an open door. “That’s wrong,” slams it shut.”
I need to embrace this more. I try often to seek to understand, but can do better. I agree with Paul, though. Some people (even ourselves) try to manipulate to suit our purpose.
“Tell me more,” is a wonderful way to advance the conversation. When I get feedback both positive and negative, I often ask, “what makes you say that?” I want to know what’s happening in the person’s heart and mind. Good stuff here.
Thanks, Pete. Leaning into feedback is a powerful opportunity that we often miss. Digging into the reason people give the feedback is the context to explore. I’m glad you dropped in today.
Thanks SB. The urge to know and solve is stronger than the urge to understand. I rush to solutions. It would be useful if my urge to understand was as strong as my drive to know and solve.
On #2, you should start by learning why you don’t like them. Is it because they have a different perspective that makes you uncomfortable? It is because they have an abrasive personality? Or it is because they have lost your trust and respect?
Thanks, Jennifer. I was thinking this morning that one reason I don’t like people is they are like me. Sometimes the people who show me who I am irritate me. 🙂
The pill of humility is so hard to swallow, especially if it is administered from someone who is an irritant to you. Thanks for the reminder that “understanding” gives clarity, “illumination” offers undiscovered frontiers.
Thanks, Darrell. Arrogance is natural, even for the timid. When humility is easy, we don’t understand it. (At least in my experience.)
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