Questions Aren’t Curiosity
There’s no curiosity when you know the answer.
Questions that end with verbs aren’t curious. They’re controlling.
“We agree this was the best option, don’t we?”
“That’s what we decided, correct?”
Leaders ask questions but haven’t learned to inquire.
Contrast
Questions collect information.
Curiosity seeks understanding.
Work questions aim for speed, clarity, compliance, and closure.
- “What happened?”
- “Why did you do that?”
- “Did you follow the process?”
- “When will this be finished?”
You can ask questions without caring about people.
Work questions move work forward. Curious questions move people forward.
Examples
Curiosity shows up as inquiry:
- “Help me understand how you saw this.”
- “What felt most important to you?”
- “What surprised you?”
- “What am I missing?”
- “What are you learning?”
- “What’s working?”
- “What will you do differently next time?”
Curious leaders invite thinking. Work questions often invite defensiveness.
Use Both
Ask questions when you need answers.
Practice inquiry when you want growth.
Questions solve problems.
Curious questions develop people.
Shift Conversations
Being curious slows conversations.
Control speeds it up.
Work questions narrow options.
Inquiry opens them.
Action
Before your next conversation:
- Check your motive. Is this about work or development? Or both?
- Do you need to know or understand?
- Prepare one curious question.
- Commit to talk less and listen more.
Curiosity isn’t simply asking better questions. It’s caring about people.
What makes curiosity hard?
How can leaders practice being curious?
Seven Ways Curious Leaders Succeed
The Importance of Being Curious
Good insights, Dan. Wouldn’t you agree? 😊 Thanks for delving into asking questions. It’s such a critical part of leading, if not life in general.
🙂 Yes, I agree!
A slower conversation isn’t always better. And often a slower conversation ends up being a time saver because you have time to see the cliff before you reach the edge rather than after you’ve gone over it.
Questions without curiosity are leaders’ ways of letting employee think they have a say and their opinion matters, when employees really don’t. Leaders can then “boast” of employee participation and inclusivity in the process.
Thank you, Dan. I have been struggling to find a way to reach a new subordinate. She is not developing and I have noticed a pattern of avoidance. I am hoping your questions will allow us both to move forward.