3 Ways Remembering Advantages Leaders
The beauty of a poor memory is life is filled with surprises.
The danger of not remembering is an untethered life.
#1. Remembering informs identity.
You know who you are by remembering.
Remembering who you are is a rudder in life.
I haven’t lived on a dairy farm for decades, but I’m still a farm boy from Central Maine. I don’t want to milk cows and shovel manure, but memories of farm life are my potter’s wheel.
You’re always who you were when you were 13.
Identity is your grip on decision making.
Leadership tip: Listen to people’s stories and remind them who they are.
When making tough decisions ask:
- What do people like you do in situations like this? Is that what you want to do this time?
- Who is this situation calling you to become?
- Who will you be tomorrow if you make that choice today?
- What values are impacting the way you interpret this situation?
Leadership tip: Know the formative stories of everyone on the team.
#2. Remembering animates the discouraged.
You feel fulfilled when present actions connect with pleasing memories.
Leadership tip: Remind people of choices and behaviors that resulted in hard earned progress.
- What’s something hard you did in the past?
- What factors contributed to your success?
- What did you do then that you will do today?
You give up when you forget past achievement.
#3. Remembering humbles the arrogant.
It’s useful to tame your ego.
Self-made is a myth that insults everyone who helped you. Arrogance forgets all the shoulders it stands on.
Ingratitude dominates those who forget all those who lifted them.
The height you reach depends on the shoulders you stand upon.
What benefits of remembering can you add to the above list?
Still curious: 4 Ways to Make the Past a Platform – Not an Anchor
Reminding people of their previous successes can be a big boost to their confidence.
Imperfect remembering, makes the fish I caught get bigger.
Good one, Paul. “Imperfect remembering.” 🙂
Your timing is noteworthy
Last weekend I had the unique opportunity to host my first boss for the day. He hired me to work in His bicycle/hobby shop when I was thirteen (I’m mid 60’s today). We now live hundreds of miles apart. We visited my 14-year-old grandson who works in a bicycle shop.
It was a wonderful experience to connect these two important ends of my life. We enjoyed a long lunch and talk of our mutual memories of the shop days. Many, many great stories (we repaired flat bike tires for $1.25) we talked about how his example and integrity continued to shape me into adulthood. I had the opportunity to thank him in real time.
In the afternoon we attended a celebration event for a non-profit I serve on the Board of. He saw and heard the “today Ken” roles and sensitivities.
For me it was a blessing beyond description, and caused me to think broadly about purpose, roles,, formative people, and God’s hand on my course.
You correctly observe, that these theaters to the past (like a kite’s string) allow us to fly, grow, thrive.
Eloquently stated, Ken. Congratulations.
Your comment also reminded me that expressing gratitude is a huge factor in our own happiness and fulfillment.
Remembering that 13 year old inside can allow for embracing and understanding one’s self. Remembering the things you were told that resonated with you and the things you read that reached your heart along the way can make the path forward much smoother. And sometimes remembering the things you were wrong about can help in keeping an open mind.
Thanks Karen. We know that we aren’t exactly like that 13 yr old. But, as you say, he/she is inside us. It’s useful to remember what formed him/her and the mistakes that taught her/him.
Such a gift, remembering our roots and where we came from. That is something that I do keep at the forefront of my mind. I wasn’t made this way, I earned this self by all of my experiences. They were hard, easy, painful, happy or hurtful experiences, but I wouldn’t be who I am today without that experience. Great reminder, thank you!
Hi Dan, a great post! This one hit me in a good way. It’s good to remember. Thinking about what I was like and what I had learned by the time I was 13, and how this is connected to what I did/became later, is an interesting perspective. Quite humbling, actually.
I love asking questions similar to this in interviews to see who each individual is and if they will fit in with the team we have established.
I also like the idea that we will always be that 13 year old and how much that shapes how I manage today. Gives me a lot to think about today!