A What Without a How
A “what” without a “how” is like a car without gas.
My “what” statement:
What I’m doing in life is adding value to others in ways consistent with who I am and that energize me. Sounds great but it’s comfortably ambiguous.
Asking how:
“What” is not enough.
Asking how I can add value moves me from pie in the sky to rubber hits the road. That’s what I did while driving home yesterday. “What” determines destination. “How” explains action.
The first “how”:
Five “hows” that give feet to my “what”.
- Encourage, nurture, support, and believe in my wife.
- Help others know themselves by listening for their values and creating or exploring meaningful opportunities that express their values.
- Help others to say the hard things about their performance.
- Because I’m a talker, I’ll talk less and listen more.
- Find people with passion and help them enhance their value.
The second “how”:
The first how helps but doesn’t go far enough. For example, how will I encourage my wife? Or, how will I focus on people with passion?
I’ll encourage my wife by cleaning the kitchen. That’s no impotent mirage that makes me feel like I’ve done something when I haven’t.
How will I find people with passion? I’ll gravitate toward frustrated people and see if I can fuel their fire.
Take action:
Leaders always focus on “what” first. But without two “how” questions you’ll stagnate.
You may be wondering, what about “why”? That’s a good question for another day. Today is “how” day.
“How” can you add value today?
Dear Dan,
I agree that “what” determines destination and “how” explains action. I can add value by understanding value itself. What is value ? I think meaning of value differs from person to person. For one it could be tangible and for others it could be intangible. For one, it could be money, position and power, for others it could be serving, helping and empowering others without any expectation. Value actually is decided by what is important for you in life. Money could be value for the one, who really gives importance to it. For others, reputation and social prestige could be value. So, I believe that meaning of value is directly related to what is important for you in your life.
Dear Ajay,
Thanks for expanding on the idea of value. It points us in a valuable direction and keeps us on track.
If we don’t understand value we can’t add it.
Nice.
Best regards,
Dan
Ajay is a featured contributor on Leadership Freak. Read his bio at http://leadershipfreak.wordpress.com/ajay-gupta
Ask not what your spouse can do for you; ask what you can do for your spouse!
Stay tuned into The Light!
Illuminatingly,
Voncelle Volté
voncellevolte.blogspot.com
Crack me up…what a great quote to start the day Voncelle!
Once again, great clarification, Dan.
And as usual it transfers into leading others as well. I believe the trick is giving people their what and why, then letting them figure out the how. Your concept of the second (or third or fourth) why is a great tool for leaders to help others do just that.
Thanks!
Great points
One of my favorite questions is “what would it look like to DO that?”
Clarifying and communicating the HOW not only creates more ownership and accountability, it also aligns people around the right actions necessary to create the WHAT.
Hi Dan,
I love the focus that “how” brings to well-meaning “what,” and I had to laugh when at the end of the post you mentioned “why” the way you did, as by that time I was wondering just as you described, LOL!
“How” is really powerful because it is a step from concept to reality.
And why is powerful too, isn’t it, as it brings in desire.
The timing of your post is fun for me, because I just completed the second in a series of blog entries that treat the “why” question, and I enjoyed seeing the “how” bit here.
I believe that “how” comes after “why.” By the time we are asking how you are going to create something, the “why” is already there, even if we haven’t consciously thought about it yet.
We can have strong “why” or weak “why”… well, like you said, that’s a topic for another day.
😉
Hi Mark,
Thank you for generously sharing your insights.
For those who don’t know here is a link to Mark’s blog: http://www.successwaypoint.com/EDL_BLOG/BLOG.php
Thanks again,
Dan
Dan, thanks for the kind words and the plug! 🙂 Means a lot coming from you!
~Mark
I read a great quote recently: “Everything in life is speaking in spite of its apparent silence” (Hazrat Inayat Khan). To some degree this is the flip side of “talk less and listen more.” For the quieter presences in your organization, one “how” is to seek out their opinion or suggestions – and if they are more of a writer than a talker (or vice versa) try to make it possible for them to use their preferred mode of communication – you may be surprised what you unearth.
Love that Khan quote, Paula… I believe that…
Your post reminds me of this trick I learned from a metaphysical book I once read, and I use it often. I will ask myself: “If what were going on right now were a dream, what meaning would I assign the individuals, events and objects in that dream?”
Surprising what can come of that, and how silent objects, events and people will suddenly speak. 🙂
Mark, your “dream trick” and the accompanying comment dovetails amazingly with some questions I am asking myself lately. I sent you an email to elaborate. Thank you – if this conversation were a dream it wouldn’t be a nightmare. 🙂
Paula,
It’s an uplift to know that you found value in what I wrote. I received your note and replied. Fun stuff, this. 🙂 Always a pleasure…
~M
Hey Mark, just a bit late, but thanks for the reframe or alternative frame of ‘dream state’…has given me pause over the last couple of days and taking the time to reflect/reframe is a good thing! Maybe we all can get to the point where when people ask how we are doing, we can respond truly with ‘livin’ the dream!’ Thanks!
Doc
You know a post hits home when your brain is filling out your own form as you read it. I like the simplicity and the direct tie to action that you presented. I wonder what the impact would be if we used this language in performance conversations / development discussions?
It is funny how changing words often changes attitudes / outcomes. Thanks for sharing these simple but impactful words.
Scott,
Thank you for an encouraging comment. I like saying that a great book helps me think my own thoughts.
I’ll keep looking for your insights on future posts.
Best,
Dan
Excellent. What do we believe and how do we live it?
KaChing
What comes first, what we believe or how we live? What if we turned it around to “how do we live, therefore what do(es it show that) we believe?”
Now the trick is to step back and see ourselves and get the clues as to what we believe.
What if we see how we act, and it conflicts with what we think we believe? Hmmm. Some self reflection time!
A What without a How is often a lot of empty words. As I read this, in my mind I thought about a curriculum, lots of Whats, not enough Hows, which is the reason of an interview. And even then, the interviewer focusing on the wrong question will get a good, but worthless answer.
Thank you Dan for such a nice post. you always make my day.
Dan,
You put a little different twist on the 2 things – serving others and listening. I like the way you put it.
Could you explain how you get others to say the hard things about their performance? That’s a tough one.
Connie
Thank so much for this. Just what my day called for!!!!!
I meant to say thank you!!!!!
Deep deep thoughts today, great comments all! Invigorating!
Dan, your #3 how….”Get others to say the hard things about their performance” has some serious legs. May not even have to be the ‘hard’ things, just things about their performance is a great start. From there grows inner vision and synthesis to others’ visions…about deep personal ownership of one’s work. To be able to have others comment about the hard stuff, even deeper. That seems to be the very large nugget I am mining for a bit. Thanks for opening up this vein!
Doc
Hello Dan,
Brilliant points to note!!
I’ve totally shared it, and I consider it giving perspective to goals! It’s not enough to wish it, a step further is the doing, upon a fundamental basis of why!!
…Can’t wait for “why” day 🙂
Thanks for sharing…Tyna
I encourage my wife by vacuuming the house (3 indoor cats) and scooping the litter boxes twice a day when I am home.
I like the two additional questions. Good food for thought.
Dan,great thank you for sharing part of who you are with us all yet again. I feel great now that I am assured i am frustrated!
To add value I can do more of what comes naturally to me (once I get over my natural shyness ) how – by approaching people I am not currently approaching and listening, listening with care and consideration, without j udgement and in all fairness. How – by not feeling obliged to provide an answer.
Thanks heaps and loved Marks and Paula’s exchange too.
Richard
Great post Dan as usual. The reverie of it all, Paula with the silence that speaks and Mark with the dream in Metamorphosis, and Doc with the performance that rocks with or without legs and Voncelli who discovered the holy grail of espousal bliss, WOW someone please pass the oxygen having trouble breathing! 🙂 Absolutely wonderful and inspiring, thank you Dan for exploring this dimension and again as mentioned above leaving the window slightly cracked to catch yet another glimpse of who you are. 🙂 Value can simply be defined as those things which like a boomerang enrich the lives of others and returns to lift us to who we are. Cheers all.