10 Relational-Steps to Improve Performance and Elevate Satisfaction

It’s  energizing to work with people who are devoted to improvement and painful working with self-justifying losers.


Anyone who isn’t dedicated to improving their performance ends up:

  1. Complacent.
  2. Complaining.
  3. Mediocre.
  4. Blaming.
  5. Detached.

10 steps to mutual self-improvement:

  1. Establish a two-way relationship that’s dedicated to mutual improvement. “How might we help each other improve?”
  2. Craft a list of twenty behaviors/results you both might improve. Include things like having tough conversations, running great meetings, asking powerful questions, for example.
  3. Include items on the list that strengthen relationship as well as deliver results. “Engage in behaviors that help people feel supported.”
  4. Choose five areas for personal improvement from the list.
  5. Add two items to each other’s list. Everyone has blindspots.
  6. Pick one item to improve this week. Suppose you commit to asking powerful questions and your partner chooses bringing up awkward issues.
  7. Identify one or two behaviors that express your intent. You might say, “When you see me (insert behavior) you know I’m working on improving (insert result).” It might go like this. “When you see me asking follow-up questions, you know I’m working on asking powerful questions.”
  8. Report success and learning to each other in the middle of the week.
  9. Reject excuses like, “I didn’t have time or opportunity.” If days go by and you don’t have opportunity to improve the behavior you selected, choose something else. Results and behaviors aren’t relevant if you don’t have recurring opportunities to work on them. Choosing irrelevant behaviors is a smokescreen.
  10. Adopt a ‘what’s next’ approach. Brag about progress in your weekly meeting and set new goals. (Yes, I wrote brag.)

Skillful leaders work on self-improvement more than other-improvement.

Tip: Don’t ask for help as an underhanded way to give instruction.

How might leaders work on self-improvement and other-improvement at the same time?