Everything You Need to Know About “NOT” Being Yourself
Warren Bennis was brilliant when he said, “Becoming a leader is synonymous with becoming yourself.” But what if you’re a jerk-hole?
Perhaps you shouldn’t always ‘be yourself’. I’ve been told, for example, we should write the way we talk. (Be yourself.) But what if you’re a boring windbag when you talk?
Sammy Davis Jr. sang, “I’ve Gotta Be Me.” The lyric goes, “What else could I be but what I am?”
The way you were born doesn’t reflect the person you could become.
It’s one thing to accept a genetic disposition toward alcoholism, for example. It’s destructive to embrace it.
Sometimes I’m at my best when I’m being like someone else.
Perhaps you don’t gotta be you. But how?
I enjoy being like people I admire.
I remember the slow painful recovery after my accident. One day I looked in the mirror and saw my dad looking back. (Not literally of course.)
When I looked in the mirror that day, I admired my own toughness. That’s when I realized that the grit in me was dad-in-me. It still feels fantastic.
When I’m like the people I admire, I affirm my best self.
It’s fulfilling to be like someone who has strength where you have weakness.
I practice humility by reflecting on humble people I respect, not by following natural inclinations.
I learn to connect with others by reflecting on the great connectors in my life, not by doing what comes naturally.
I learn wisdom by emulating the sages.
Choose carefully when choosing people to emulate.
Show me your influences and I’ll tell you who you will become.
- Move from admiration to emulation.
- Being impacts behaviors and behaviors impact being.
- Listen to things that rub you the wrong way. They expand you.
How might being yourself not serve you well?
How has emulating someone made you a better person?