How to be Happy by Complaining More
Complaining done well increases happiness. Don’t get the wrong impression. Curmudgeons are toxic. The difference is ego. Big shots are never happy. They complain because the world revolves around them.
Complaining more:
We’re looking for white lights for our fake Christmas tree with fake snow on it. I love complaining about fake Christmas trees and white lights. Thankfully, we didn’t find any.
I decided to fill up at Sam’s Club before driving home. Gas is 20 cents cheaper. That’s when my problems began.
Waiting turns me into a caged animal. When there’s a line at a restaurant, I don’t get out of the car. I’d rather go hungry. Choosing a line at a gas station is an art. Don’t get behind a pickup with dual wheels. It probably has two gas tanks.
My wife noticed an opening on the right bank of pumps. I went for it. It was blocked by an orange cone. Doh!
I drove around the station to start again. I said the same bad word several times in a row while going to the back of the line. Saying bad words makes me happy.
My second mistake was choosing the shortest line. Never choose the shortest line. Look for fast people and economy cars. We got one thing right. Economy cars.
I swear the guy at the pump had never pumped gas before. He stared at the pump like he’d never seen one. I wanted to get out and show him where to put his freaking credit card. Then he looked at the handle like it was a novelty. Just pick it up!
Eventually he turned to his car and contemplated the best way to open his gas tank. I complained with delight through the whole experience.
The best things to complain about are insignificant. And my wife is searching online for white Christmas lights.
Complaining poisons life when you take yourself seriously.
What is the difference between toxic and non-toxic complaining?
Something serious about the value of complaining: Go Ahead and Complain. It Might Be Good for You
Great read and you had me laughing this morning, Dan! Complaining about the insignificant can be a great way to navigate the little things that we make big. Toxic complaining is contagious and can be a drain on people, teams, and process. Toxic complainers stink!
Thanks Kyle. Your insight that complaining about insignificant things is a way to navigate little things is helpful. Complaining about little things is a reminder that they are little things, as long as we don’t take ourselves too seriously.
Yeh, light-hearted complaining that you can turn into a funny story is the best!
Thanks Paul.
Dan, I tell the people that I supervise, Its always fine/good to get stuff off your chest…telling me all your frustrations once is venting (good): However, continuing to revisit the same issues is complaining (not good). They tell me that they like that logic. It allows them to vent, feel better, then move on with the day.
Great point. Listening to the same complaint over and over isn’t destructive. Worst of all it promotes helplessness.
Bahahaha! I hate to admit that I can identify with you way too much! Mocking ourselves might be the best therapy.
Well said, sjrgcms. I laugh at myself when I get upset at stupid things. I say, “You are a lucky person if you’re complaining about something so insignificant.”
Sounds a bit like when my friends and I, after “complaining,” will comment about how difficult it is to deal with all these first-world problems! 🙂
LOL! Great post, Dan!
Thanks Michael.
For this purpose, I run a local facebook page here called, “Cranky Expats of Cuenca” (in Ecuador) just so people can vent about different things and share thoughts. My initial goal was simply to provide a place for simple stuff…
So good, Scott. It feels like things got a little serious, too.
I am not really a complainer, but my husband is! It can be exhausting. This was a good read for me–I have a different understanding about my husband’s complaining. Thank you for sharing Dan!!
Thanks Tracey. The next time your husband complains, ask him if that’s the best he’s got. Or say, “And what else…” Keep it going until it’s just ridiculous. 🙂 …
After listening for awhile say something stupid like, “Life sucks bad,” but never offer any solutions.
How did you know I needed this post today. Thank you!
Well Stacy, some of us need this post every day. 🙂
Some people are not happy unless they are complaining. Complaining brings more situations to the complainer to complain about. You are mentally attracting it to you. My experience.
This is true for people who take themselves seriously. It’s sad. I wonder if complaining is one way to feel powerful when you believe you are helpless.
Thanks for the laugh this morning!
My pleasure. Thanks for being a reader.
A good rant about everyday annoyances is the stuff of stand-up comedy. It’s a cathartic laugh and relatable to everyone. When leaders do it, it makes them human.
Thanks Chris. It’s always good to be human. It seems to align with reality.
there is no difference in toxic and non toxic complaining, both is negative & i want no part in it. I observe the situation and just let it be.. there is always something to learn . Do my part and move forward .. no time to complain , toxic or not .. we have things to achieve !!
idealist view?