The 4 Powers of Respect and How to Earn Them

Being respected is better than being liked.

Those who need to be liked, end up disrespected.

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4 powers of respect:

  1. Opportunity. Respect comes before advancement and promotion.
  2. Engagement. The danger of disrespect is disengagement.
  3. Attraction. We move toward people we admire and away from those we disdain.
  4. Impact. Respect enables you to matter more.

5 behaviors that invite disrespect:

  1. Out-do everyone.
  2. Avoid tough stuff. Run from tough conversations, decisions, and situations.
  3. Ignore the impact of decisions on others.
  4. Keep people at arm’s length.
  5. Refuse to change your mind or worse yet flip flop like a fish on the dock.

Bonus: Be a kiss-up.

15 ways to earn respect:

Leaders receive respect because of position, but lose it because of behavior.

  1. Lift others. Think back over your life. I bet you still admire those who helped you be better. For example, bring teammates to the meeting to report for themselves. Don’t report for them. (You may need to mentor them through the process.)
  2. Invite people to teach you.
  3. Reach high. Teams mock mediocre leaders.
  4. Give respect. One secret to earning respect is giving it.
  5. Say thank you, a lot.
  6. Explore the difference between tough and aggressive.
  7. Maintain optimism without minimizing challenges.
  8. Forget about your title or position. Never say, “I’m the boss,” unless it’s to take responsibility.
  9. Open your heart. Don’t clench your fist.
  10. Be secure enough to laugh at yourself.
  11. Apologize. “I was wrong,” earns more respect than, “I told you so.” (Realize that failing in the same way repeatedly invites scorn.)
  12. Practice transparency and candor.
  13. Know and acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses. Authenticity earns respect.
  14. Connect with the front-line, not just top dogs.
  15. Ask, “What matters to you?”

It doesn’t matter if people like you as long as they respect you.

How do leaders lose respect?

What behaviors earn respect from others?