Treat People as They Are – Not as You Are

It’s frustrating to expect people to be like you when they are like them.

Understanding and accepting people is leadership’s missed opportunity.

Don’t be so busy with goals and plans that you forget that people get things done.

Understand Values:

Values energize behaviors, drive commitments, and produce satisfaction.

There’s a woman on my team who loves to help people feel they belong. It’s a thing of beauty to see her expressing her value.

You frustrate and demotivate teammates when you violate their values.

You respect and energize teammates when you help them express their values.

Understand Doers:

Doers need a clear goal and reasonable plan. Once a doer sees the path forward, they’re dynamos. Before a Doer sees the path forward, they seem like anchors.


Beware of disillusioned Doers. They’ll sabotage others to prove they’re right. They’ll pull back, let others fail, and then say, “See, I told you so.”

Understand Dreamers:

Dreamers love ideas, jump quickly, and sometimes flame out.

Invite them to explore new ideas.


Beware dreamers who start too many things and finish too few.

Understand Introverts:

Quiet introverts enjoy time to reflect. If you want an introvert to move forward, give them time to think.

Understand Extroverts:

Aggressive extroverts respond to kind but firm instruction. It’s not anger, but confidence that reaches aggressive extroverts.

Talk it through with extroverts.

Understand four people principles:

  1. Adapt where you can. Confront where you must.
  2. The way you treat people reflects who YOU are. Fearful leaders tend toward self-protective responses. Authentic leaders speak up with courage and kindness.
  3. Always seek the best interest of others, especially when confronting or correcting.
  4. Practice kind candor, forward-facing curiosity, and courageous transparency with all. Humility is the secret to effective candor, curiosity, and transparency.

What types of people might leaders encounter?

What tips do you have for success with people?