When Failure Matters
The self-defense instructor taught us to escape first. But if you can’t escape, put your back up against the wall or find a corner to stand in. Attackers can’t surround you – vulnerabilities diminish by 50 and 75 percent, respectively.
Every leader has been up against the wall. What was it like?
Up against the wall is the place
where failure matters.
Benefits:
- “Proper” procedures fade.
- Fear creates resolve.
- Passivity turns to activity.
- Confusion turns to clarity.
- Confusion turns to clarity.
- Everything matters more.
- You forget about what others think of you.
Opportunities:
- Clarify your mission – realign.
- Forget what you used to do – reinvent.
- Escape remembered identity – reimagine.
- Assess the strengths of your current team – reexamine.
- Better utilize the strengths of your team – reassign.
- Tap into sustaining relationships both within and without – reconnect.
- Act decisively.
- Be willing to fail large, it’s freeing – release.
When you’re up against the wall, stop doing the things that got you there.
What has being up against the wall done for you?
What suggestions can you offer leaders who are up against the wall?
We’ve all been there, I guess! The most creative solutions come out of desperation if you allow them to. Thanks for a great reminder and practical checklist for those times. Maybe I’ll print it out and keep it in my wallet, Dan 🙂
Thank you Monica.
I appreciate the term “desperation.” Sometimes life gets that way.
I think the big thing about being up against the wall is it forces a change of direction. We usually keep moving the same way even if it’s not working…until we run into a road block. But, it’s important to remember it’s not the end of the journey, just a change in the path to get there.
Thank you Harrison.
Great point. A tipping point is a beginning that includes a powerful ending.
I’ve seen people with their back against the wall, who instead of taking that moment for contemplation and realignment, going into attack mode themselves. Nobody likes to fail, but in some cases going down fighting, instead of thinking strategically, increases the chances of staying down.
Thank you Laurie.
Well said. I see the idea of blaming rather than taking responsibility as an ineffective attack mode.
The other day, I was just thinking about these options… using every failing dream an opportunity to revive another one..
Thank you Tweezer.
Lets go revive..renew…reinvent.
Totally up for that!! 🙂
Dan,
Being up against the wall and surviving allowed me to know for certain that I could be up against the wall in my future and survive also. That is a huge lesson to learn and you can only do it up against the wall.
I loved your #7 in benefits. Being up against the wall breaks you free of worrying about what other people think about you. Women care about that enormously. We want people to like us. We are nurturers by nature. It is extremely hard to stop worrying about what other people think. But being against the wall will finally free you of it.
Surviving the up-against-the wall moment and realizing that you cannot control what ohter people think, will transform you. It makes you feel like you have a black belt. We don’t attack needlessly. But we’ve learned we can protect what we value, maybe redirect our efforts and go on.
Dauna Easley
Being up against the wall really brIngs into focus what’s most important. The other things become peripheral.
When leaders fail they learn not to do that again that way, i.e., they learn from their mistakes.
When managers (non-leaders) fail, they learn not to do that again, i.e., they do not learn from their mistakes.
You know, Dan, sometimes (often) I read LF and need to let it sit for a while before I compose a comment. This time the response was virtually immediate (for me) to “What has being up against a wall done for you?” Being up against a wall forces you to be honest with yourself …. have to admit that you have had your head in the sand, have been giving yourself way too much credit, have avoided taking responsibility. Not to say that events don’t occur in our lives where we truly have been handed a raw deal or have been victims, but in many cases we stop asking ourselves the hard questions and forcing ourselves to make the most difficult of choices. Being against that wall can be a pretty unyielding vantage point from which to face all this.
One obvious concrete answer is to move laterally…meaning you still have options to shift perspective, the environment, and the situation. Another allusion may be is that there is something or someone confronting you.
In the moment, you deal. Sometimes, you may even lean into it. Not necessarily in a fight mode, but in an unconditional engagement mode. Lean into it to learn what you may have missed before. Lean, listen, and truly feel with all of your head, heart and spirit. As you do that, options do appear. Being in that moment can yield phenomenal clarity…of purpose as you noted Dan.
In the long term, perhaps to grow from the experience, a little root cause analysis might be productive in identifying how you did not see that that bright light coming at you was not the end of the tunnel but an oncoming train. How did you miss the early signs…were you being avoidant, distracted, or too self-involved.
When your back is against the wall, it limits the choices. You can go forward and take a beating, or you can just stand there and take a beating. If I’m going to be beat, I’m at least going to try to fight.
Dan, the best organizations I ever worked for instilled that sense of desperation at all times — we were desperate to do great work, desperate to help our clients succeed, desperate to prove ourselves as individuals and as a team. Then I moved to the big city, and people were more concerned about their bonuses. The work wasn’t nearly as good. Go figure.
@barrettrossie
You know Dan, it is really amazing all we can do when we are aginst the wall. Sometimes I try to “pretend” I’m there to make something really good happen. Although it can worn you out it is very interesting.