Six Step Transformational Conversations
“Many people who could have made the biggest difference in my life didn’t.”
@pastorhudson tweeted back, “WOW that’s so true! My question is why? Did they not know? Not care? Not have time?”
I thought, “Great questions?”
Why haven’t they made a bigger difference?
- We didn’t go to them?
- They didn’t come to us?
- They had bigger issues to deal with. We weren’t a priority?
- We didn’t realize their valuable till it was too late?
- We felt we already had answers but we didn’t?
- Perhaps they didn’t know how?
Here’s how to have conversations that make a big difference.
6 steps to transformational conversations:
- Listen to their passions and ideas. Ask them to tell their story. Listen for achievements and frustrations. Successes illustrate competencies; frustrations reveal unfulfilled passions.
- Repeat it back. Tell them what you hear but don’t pressure them to agree with your initial impressions. Clarify and embrace, again.
- Say yes to their hopes. Forget your hopes for them; uncover their hopes for themselves – hopes they don’t yet know they have. Your greatest power is helping others find their greatest hopes. (Tomorrow I’ll explain how to help others have more hope.)
- Explore next steps. Avoid eating the whole elephant; help them take a bite. Leadership is always about next steps, always. You aren’t leading till they can explain next steps.
- Set the next meeting. Once you find a compelling next step, say, “I’d love to hear how that goes. When can we get together next week?”
- Say, “How can I help?” Open doors and share insights but never do for.
Never let distant uncertainties prevent the pursuit of near certainties.
What steps would you add to enhance a transformational conversation?
What can leaders do to make a big difference in the lives of others?